An American Werewolf in London

An American Werewolf in London is a 1981 horror-comedy film about two American tourists in England who are attacked by a werewolf that none of the locals will admit exists.
 * Written and directed by John Landis. 

From the director of Animal House... comes a different kind of animal taglines

David Kessler

 * [while transforming] I didn't mean to call you a meatloaf, Jack!

Dr. J. S. Hirsch

 * If the villagers believe that Jack Goodman was killed by a werewolf, why shouldn't David? And then it follows, that if he survived an attack by a werewolf, wouldn't he himself become a werewolf at the next full moon? Oh, I don't mean running about on all fours and howling at the moon; but, in such a deranged state he might harm himself. Perhaps other people.

Dialogue

 * Jack: The Slaughtered Lamb?
 * David: Of course, The Slaughtered Lamb. Why else would they have a severed fox head on a spear as their symbol?
 * Jack: That's a wolf's head.
 * David: Of course, The Slaughtered Lamb. Why else would they have a severed wolf's head on a spear as their symbol?
 * Jack: That's not a spear. It's a pike.
 * David: A severed wolf's head on a pike as their symbol.
 * Jack: David, before we go in there I want you to know that - no matter what happens to us - it's your fault.
 * David: I assume full responsibility.
 * Jack: Okay.
 * David: Shall we?


 * [recalling what they are told in The Slaughtered Lamb]
 * David: Keep off the moors.
 * Jack: And stay on the road.
 * [they look down to see that they have wandered off the road]
 * David: Oops.


 * Jack: I vote we go back to The Slaughtered Lamb.
 * [a howl is heard in the distance]
 * Jack: Did you hear that?
 * David: I heard that.
 * Jack: What was it?
 * David: Could be a lot of things.
 * Jack: Yeah?
 * David: A coyote.
 * Jack: There aren't any coyotes in England.
 * David: The Hound of the Baskervilles.
 * Jack: Pecos Bill.
 * David: Heathcliff.
 * Jack: Heathcliff didn't howl!
 * David: No, but he was on the moors.


 * Dr. Hirsch: Did you get a good look at the man who attacked you?
 * David: I've told you, it wasn't a man. It was an animal. A big wolf or something. A rabid dog.
 * Dr. Hirsch: Yes.
 * David: Look, Dr. Hirsch, I know I've been traumatized, but Jack was torn apart. I saw him. A man can't do that to someone with his bare hands.
 * Dr. Hirsch: You'd be surprised what horrors a man is capable of.
 * David: Did you see Jack?
 * Dr. Hirsch: No. In fact, your wounds were cleaned and dressed before you arrived here.
 * David: Did you talk to the police in East Proctor? Did the cops go to The Slaughtered Lamb?
 * Dr. Hirsch: I really don't know.
 * David: Then why the hell are you so quick to disbelieve me? You yourself said it must have taken incredible strength to tear apart a person like that.
 * Dr. Hirsch: David, please. The police are satisfied. I'm certain that if a monster were out roaming northern England we'd have seen it on the telly.
 * David: You really think I'm crazy, don't you?
 * Dr. Hirsch: Believe me. The Hound of the Baskervilles was an invention of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's. And if you'd read the bloody book, you'd find that Holmes discovered your hound of hell a fraud, a fake. [pause] Now really, David. You're far too intelligent to go on this way. When you return to America I want you to seek out a competent psychiatrist or psychologist or something and stop this nonsense. You'll be leaving this hospital in three or four days, please remain sane. At least until you are no longer our responsibility.


 * Jack: Can I have a piece of toast?
 * David: ...Get the fuck outta here, Jack.
 * Jack: Thanks a lot.
 * David: No.. I can't take this... Am I asleep now or awake or what?
 * Jack: I realise I don't look so hot, David... [picks toast] but I though you'd be glad to see me. [beat] David! You're hurting my feelings!
 * David: Hurting your feelings? Has it occurred to you that it might be unsettling to see you rise from the grave to visit me?
 * Jack: Sorry to be upsetting you David, but I had to come. [munch]
 * David: Aren't you supposed to be buried someplace in New York?
 * Jack: Yeah. Your parents came to my funeral. I was surprised at how many people came.
 * David: Why would you be surprised? You were a very well-liked person.
 * Jack: Yeah. I was, wasn't I?
 * David: Well, I liked you.
 * Jack: Debbie Klein cried a lot.
 * David: Oh God, am I asleep now or what?
 * Jack: So.. so you know what she does? She's so grief-stricken she runs to find solace in Mark Levine's bed.
 * David: Mark Levine?
 * Jack: An asshole. Life mocks me even in death.
 * David: I'm going completely crazy....
 * Jack: ...DAVID!!
 * David: What!?
 * Jack: Now, I'm really sorry to be upsetting you, but I have to warn you.
 * David: Warn me?
 * Jack: We were attacked by a werewolf.
 * David: [covers ears] I'm not listening to this!
 * Jack: On the moors. We were attacked by a lycanthrope. A werewolf. [David uncovers ears] I was murdered. An unnatural death. And now I walk the earth in limbo until the werewolf's curse is lifted.
 * David: Shut up!
 * Jack: The wolf's bloodline must be severed. The last remaining werewolf must be destroyed. [beat; points] It's you, David.
 * David: What...?
 * Jack: Please believe me. You'll kill people.
 * David: NURSE!!
 * Jack: Listen to me!
 * David: Nurse..!
 * Jack: The supernatural, the power of darkness — it's all true. The undead surround me. Have you ever talked to a corpse? It's boring! I'm lonely! Take your life, David. Kill yourself... before you kill others. [David sobs] Please don't cry. [hears nurse coming] Beware the moon, David.


 * David: I'm a werewolf.
 * Alex: A werewolf? [she holds him until he calms] Are you better now?
 * David: I'll let you know the next full moon.


 * Alex: I'll be perfectly honest with you David, I'm not in the habit of bringing home stray, young American men.
 * David: I should hope not.
 * Alex: I find you very attractive - and a little bit sad.


 * David: [sees Jack in bathroom mirror and screams] You're not real!
 * Jack: Ah, don't be a putz David, come here. A nurse huh.?
 * David: [closes door] Shhh, come on. What are you doing here?
 * Jack: I wanted to see you
 * [picks up Mickey mouse figure; high pitched]
 * Jack: Hi, David.
 * David: Put that down! Ok you've seen me now go away.
 * Jack: I'm sorry I'm upsetting you David, but you don't understand what's going on.
 * David: I understand all right, you're one of the undead and I'm a werewolf.
 * Jack: Yes, that's right.
 * David: Get out of here Jack.
 * Jack: Tomorrow night's the full moon, you're gonna change you'll become...
 * David: I know, I know... A monster.
 * Jack: You gotta kill yourself David, before it's too late.
 * David: Are you really dead Jack?
 * Jack: What do you think?
 * David: I think I've lost my mind. I think you're not, I think you're just another part of bad dream.
 * Jack: You've gotta believe me David.
 * David: Believe what?, that tomorrow night under the full moon I'll grow hair and fang's and eat people, bullshit!
 * Jack: Oh goddamnit David please believe me!, you'll kill and make others like me I'm not having a nice time here. You gotta take your own life.
 * David: I will not accept this, go away!
 * Jack: This is not pretend David.
 * David: I will not be threatened by a walking meatloaf.


 * David: Jack was right!
 * Alex: Jack is dead!
 * David: Jack is dead and six people are dead! There's gonna be a full moon tonight, I'm going to the cops!
 * Alex: David, please be rational! Let's go to Dr. Hirsch!
 * David: Yeah, be rational, sure. I'm a werewolf, for Christ's sake!


 * David: Alex, I've lost my mind. I woke up at the zoo! But you know what? I feel terrific!
 * Alex: The zoo?
 * David: Waking up at the zoo, that's not so insane. Having no clothes on? That's insane. What did I do last night, Alex?
 * Alex: Don't you remember?
 * David: I said goodbye to you. I was locked out of the flat. I climbed the wall and came in through the bathroom window. I started to read and then I was naked at the zoo! I guess I am out of my fucking mind.


 * David: [in Trafalgar Square] I want you to arrest me, asshole!
 * Policeman: There's no call for that kind of language.
 * David: Queen Elizabeth is a man! Prince Charles is a faggot! Winston Churchill was full of shit!
 * Policeman: : That's enough.
 * David: No! Let go of me!
 * Alex: David, please!
 * David: Shakespeare's French! Fuck! Shit! Cunt! Shit!
 * Policeman: You keep this up, sir, and I will be forced to arrest you.
 * David: That's what I want you to do, you moron!


 * Jack: I want you to meet some people. David Kessler, this is Gerald Bringsly. Gerald's the man you murdered on the subway. We thought it best for you not to see him, as he's a fresh kill and still pretty messy.
 * Bringsly: [with a slashed, bloodied face] Yes. I do look most unpleasant.
 * David: Why are you doing this to me?
 * Bringsly: This isn't Mr. Goodman's idea. He's your good friend, whereas I am a victim of your carnivorous lunar activities.
 * David: Mr. Bringsly... I'm sorry. I have absolutely no idea what to say to you.
 * Bringsly: You've left my wife a widow, and my children fatherless. And I understand I am to walk the earth in limbo, one of the living dead, until the wolf's bloodline is severed and the curse lifted. You must die, David Kessler.
 * Jack: David, this is Harry Berman and his fiancee Judith Browns.
 * Harry: [bloodied and cheerful] Hello.
 * Judith: [also bloodied and cheerful] Hello!
 * Jack: And these gentlemen are Alf, Ted, and Joseph.
 * Ted: Can't say we're pleased to meet you, Mr. Kessler.
 * David: What shall I do?
 * Jack: Suicide.
 * Harry: You must take your own life.
 * David: That's easy for you to say - you're already dead!
 * Bringsly: No, David. Harry and I and everyone you murder are not dead. The undead.
 * David: Why are you doing this to me?
 * Jack: Because this must be stopped.
 * David: How shall I do it?
 * Judith: Sleeping pills?
 * Alf: Not sure enough!
 * David: I could hang myself.
 * Jack: No. No, if you did it wrong, it could be painful. You'd choke to death.
 * Joseph: So what? Let 'im choke!
 * Jack: Do you mind? The man's a friend of mine.
 * Joseph: Well he ain't no friend to me!
 * Bringsly: Gentlemen, please.
 * Harry: A gun!
 * Alf: I know where you can get a gun.
 * David: Don't I need a silver bullet or something?
 * Jack: [rolling his eyes] Oh, be serious, would you?
 * David: Madness...
 * Harry: No, a gun would be good!
 * Judith: Yes, you just put the gun to your forehead and pull the trigger!
 * Bringsly: If you put it in your mouth, you'd be sure not to miss.
 * David: Thank you, you're all so thoughtful.
 * Alf: A knife.
 * Harry: An electric shock.
 * Judith: A car crash.
 * Bringsly: You could throw yourself in front of a tube.
 * Ted: Drowning!


 * Darts Player: [to David Kessler & Jack Goodman] Stay on the road. Keep clear of the moors.

Taglines

 * From the director of Animal House... Comes a different kind of animal.
 * Something different.
 * A masterpiece of terror.

Cast

 * David Naughton — David Kessler
 * Griffin Dunne — Jack Goodman
 * Jenny Agutter — Nurse Alex Price
 * John Woodvine - Dr. J. S. Hirsch
 * Michael Carter - Gerard Bringsley
 * Don McKillop - Inspector Villiers
 * Frank Oz - Mr. Collins
 * Paul Kember - Sergeant McManus
 * Sydney Bromley - Alf
 * Frank Singuineau - Ted
 * Will Leighton - Joseph
 * Geoffrey Burridge - Harry Berman
 * Brenda Cavendish - Judith Browns