Dennis the Menace (1959 TV series)

Dennis the Menace (1959-1963) was a sitcom, airing on CBS, about an overly helpful boy that always seems to cause chaos.

Keep Off The Grass [3.03]

 * [Mr. Wilson, Henry and Dennis walk up to Officer Grant in the park.]
 * Mr. Wilson: Oh officer, we'd like a word with you.
 * Henry: Mr. Wilson, are you sure we're doing the right thing?
 * Mr. Wilson: Of course I am. Justice will prevail.
 * Officer Grant: Hello, Mr. Mitchell. Hi Sonny. What's up?
 * Dennis: Mr. Wilson says I'm old enough to be a citizen!
 * Mr. Wilson: Never mind the boy, you just pay attention to me. Now first I'd like to point out that we are standing on the sidewalk.
 * Officer Grant: Well, yes I can see that.
 * Mr. Wilson: So don't claim that there's grass under our feet!
 * Officer Grant: Mr. Mitchell, what is this?
 * Henry: This is Mr. George Wilson. He has something to say to you.
 * Mr. Wilson: Oh no! You're the one who has something to say. I'm merely a bystander. Now go ahead, tell him.
 * Henry: Well officer, it's about this ticket you gave me.
 * Mr. Wilson: By which he means this totally unwarranted ticket which you had the colossal nerve to force upon!
 * Officer Grant: Is that what you mean sir?
 * Henry: Well...
 * Mr. Wilson: It certainly is! He thinks you're completely out of line and he resents it as any red blooded citizen would! Keep talking, Mitchell.
 * Officer Grant: Are you saying I didn't treat you fair?
 * Henry: Well officer, it just seemed to me that you could've given me a warning instead of a ticket. After all, that sign's only been there a few minutes.
 * Officer Grant: Well if it was up to me, I would have. But the law is the law. I don't make it, I only enforce it.
 * Mr. Wilson: Well he's not accepting your ticket, he's giving it right back to you! Aren't you Mitchell?
 * Henry: Gosh, I...
 * Mr. Wilson: Oh, here I'll give it back, let me. (Accidentally rips the ticket from Henry's hands then drops it on the ground)
 * Dennis: Jeepers dad, you're not supposed to tear up a ticket! I'll pick it right up!
 * Mr. Wilson: Never mind Dennis, just leave it there. All right officer! What are you going to do about that?
 * Officer Grant: First, I'm going to write Mr. Mitchell another ticket for walking on the grass. Then, I'm going to give him a second ticket for destroying the first one. That's interfering with an officer in the performance of his duty, you know. (starts writing Henry a third ticket.)
 * Dennis: Look dad, he's writing you another one. He sure can write awful fast!
 * Officer Grant: Throwing wastepaper on the sidewalk is against the anti-litter law, Mr. Mitchell. Does that answer your question sir?
 * Mr. Wilson: Oh, all right! You've won this round, but you'll be hearing from us again!

A Quiet Evening [3.21]

 * Margaret: Now then, we can eat, talk, play post office. What would you like to do first, Dennis?
 * Dennis: Find some way to get you out of my house!

Cast

 * Jay North - Dennis Mitchell
 * Herbert Anderson - Henry Mitchell
 * Gloria Henry - Alice Mitchell
 * Joseph Kearns - Mr. George Wilson