Dr. Seuss on the Loose

Dr. Seuss on the Loose (titled Green Eggs and Ham and Other Stories for the sing-a-long videocasette release and the Deluxe edition releases) is an animated musical television special, first airing on CBS on October 15, 1973, and hosted by The Cat in the Hat who appears in bridging sequences where he introduced animated adaptations of Dr. Seuss children's stories The Sneetches, The Zax, and Green Eggs and Ham.

The Sneetches

 * Cat in the Hat: [singing] Oh, at the edge of each ocean, You'll always find beaches. Beautiful, glorious, florious beaches. And when I meander On peacefulish beaches, I frequently find myself thinking of... "Sneetches"!
 * Sneetch Choir: [singing] Snee, snee, did you say Sneetches?
 * Cat in the Hat: [singing] Yes! S-N-E-E-T-C-H-E-S. Sneetches!...
 * Sneetch Choir: [singing] Oh... S-N-E-E-T-C-H-E-S. Sneetches!


 * Narrator: Now the Star-Bellied Sneetches had bellies with stars. But the Plain-Bellied Sneetches had none upon thars. No stars on their bellies, no stars upon thars. Now those stars weren't so big. They were really quite small. You would think such a thing wouldn't matter at all. But, because they had stars, all the Star-Belly Sneetches would brag...
 * Star-Bellied Sneetches: We're the best kind of Sneetch on the beaches!
 * Narrator: With their snoots in the air, they would sniff and they'd snort. They'd have nothing to do with the Plain-Belly sort.
 * Star-Bellied Mom: Ronald, remember: When you are out walking, you walk past a Sneetch of that type without talking. Keep your snoot in the air, and remember to snort. We have no truck whatever with the Plain-Bellied sort!


 * Sylvester McMonkey McBean: My friends, I have seen they've been treating you mean. My name is Sylvester McMonkey McBean. I know precisely why you're so unhappy, and that I can fix. I'm the Fix-it-Up Chappie. [He pushes on a lever, setting up his Star-On Machine] My prices are low. And I work with great speed. And my work is 100% guaranteed.


 * Sneetch Choir: [singing] Them over there, they got stars upon thars, And we over here, we got stars upon ours. We got 'em also, we got 'em too. We're every little bitty-bit as goody-good as you. Now we're socially acceptable at marshmallow toasts; You'll have to send us invitations to your frankfurter roasts! Stars! Stars! Bless our lucky stars! All the Sneetches... On the beaches... Now've got stars upon thars!


 * Narrator: Then of course, from then on, as you probably guessed, things really got into a horrible mess. All the rest of that day, on those wild screaming beaches, the Fix-it-Up Chappie kept fixing up Sneetches. Off again! On again! In again! Out again! Through the machines they raced round and about again, changing their stars every minute or two. They kept paying money. [speaking really fast:] They kept running through until neither the Plain nor the Star-Bellies knew whether this one was that one or that one was this one or which one was what one! [speaking more calmly:] ...Or what one was who. Then, when every last cent of their money was spent, the Fix-it-Up Chap packed up! And he went! And he laughed as he drove his car up the beach...
 * Sylvester McMonkey McBean: Ha-ha! They never will learn. No, you can't teach a Sneetch.
 * Narrator: But McBean was quite wrong! I am happy to say that the Sneetches got really quite smart on that day. That day, they decided that Sneetches are Sneetches, and no kind of Sneetch is the best on the beaches. That day, all the Sneetches forgot about stars, and whether they had one, or not, upon thars.

The Zax

 * Cat in the Hat: [singing] Oh, beyond the last mountain, the very last mountain, beyond the last Zinniga-Zanniga tree, beyond the last woomf bush, the very last woomf bush, there is a vaculous, vacant prairie. The Prairie of Prax, and the tale of the Zax.
 * Narrator: One day, making tracks in the prairie of Prax, came a North-going Zax. A North-going Zax... and a South-going Zax. A North-going Zax... and a South-going Zax. And it happened that both of them came to a place where they bumped! [They bump into each other] There they stood, foot to foot, face to face.
 * North-going Zax: Look here now!
 * Narrator: ...the North-going Zax said.
 * North-going Zax: I say! You are blocking my path, you are right in my way! I'm a North-going Zax, and I always go north. Get out of my way, now, and let me go forth!
 * South-Going Zax: Who's in whose way?
 * Narrator: ...snapped the South-going Zax.
 * South-Going Zax: I always go south, making South-going tracks. So you're in MY way! And I ask you to move and let me go south in my South-going groove.
 * Narrator: Then, the North-going Zax said with North-going pride...
 * North-going Zax: I never have taken a step to one side, and I'll prove to you that I won't change my ways if I have to keep standing here 59 days!
 * South-going Zax: And I'll prove to YOU...
 * Narrator: Yelled the South-going Zax...
 * South-going Zax: That I can stand here in the Prairie of Prax for 59 years! For I lived by a rule, that I learned as a boy back in South-going School, "Never budge!" That's my rule. "Never budge in the least! Not an inch to the west! Not an inch to the east!" I'll stay here not budging, I can and I will if it makes you and me and the whole WORLD stand still!
 * [day turns to night, then turns back to daytime, then turns windy, then rainy, then snowy, then springtime, and finally a prairie with a highway]
 * Narrator: Well, of course, the world didn't stand still. The world grew. In a couple of years, the new highway came through, and they built it right over those two stubborn Zax, and left them there, standing un-budged in their tracks.

Green Eggs and Ham

 * Cat in the Hat: [singing] Oh, I frequently think every now and then of the glorious fruit of the noble hen Eggs, eggs, E, double-G, S-eggs My knowledge of eggs is tremendously wide I've eaten them boiled, I've eaten them fried Poached and shirred and deviled and scrambled Omelets, shmomelets, cobbled, and frammeled I've eaten them beaten and swizzled and swuzzled Frizzled, cadizzled, bamboozled, and fuzzled I know every way that an egg can be guzzled And thinking of eggs reminds me of Sam Whose favorite dish Is "Green eggs and ham."
 * [Opens to see Guy-Am-I reading a newspaper. He hears dog bells and a dog barking]
 * Sam-I-Am: I am Sam! [leaves with the dog and comes back with a tiger] Sam, I am!
 * Guy: That Sam-I-Am! That Sam-I-Am! I do not like that Sam-I-Am!
 * Sam: Do you like green eggs and ham?
 * Guy: I do not like them, Sam-I-Am! I do not like green eggs and ham!
 * Choir: [singing] He does not like them, Sam-I-Am. He doesn't like, he doesn't like green eggs and ham.


 * [Sam has driven the car up a tree]
 * Sam: You may like them, you will see. You may like them in a tree.
 * Guy: I would not, could not in a tree! Not in a car! Now, let me be! [As a train passes by below, he drives out of the tree and onto the train] Not in a box! Not with a fox! Not in a house! Not with a mouse! I would not like them here or there! I would not like them anywhere! I do not like green eggs and ham! I do not like them, Sam-I-Am! [train speeds away offscreen]
 * Choir: [singing] Sam O-Sam O-Sam-I-Am. He doesn't like em', wouldn't eat them, wouldn't touch em', wouldn't eat them here or there! Or any any any any any any any anywhere!
 * [On the train, Guy is looking at a menu, but Sam appears with the green eggs and ham]
 * Sam: Could you, would you, on a train?
 * Guy: No, not on a train! Not in a tree! Not in a car! Sam, let me be! [He gets ready to leave as he opens the door] Not in a box, not with a fox! [The fox appears on the train, with the hound dogs and men on horses chasing him] Not with a mouse! Not in a house! Not here or there! Not anywhere! [He slams the door and sits down while the train moves, until it goes into a dark tunnel]
 * Sam: In the dark, here in the dark! Would you, could you, in the dark?
 * Guy: I would not, could not in the dark!


 * Sam: [With a goat on the railroad tracks] Would you, could you with a goat?
 * Guy: [Growls angrily] I would not, could not, with a goat! I will not eat them here or there! I would not eat them anywhere!
 * [Guy rides away on a handcar and lands in the hull of a ship. He climbs up out of the hull, panting. He dusts himself. He goes to the railing of the ship. He looks on the side, only to see Sam on a raft]
 * Sam: Would you, could you on a boat?
 * Guy: [cries angrily] I would not, would not on a boat! [repeatedly banging on the railing] I will not, will not with a goat! Not in the rain! Not on a train! [He hears an offscreen oncoming train. He turns and sees the train coming down the track. The train lands on the ship, bringing it down into the ocean with it. After the train/shipwreck, Guy emerges from the water and pants. He takes off his hat. Water falls out all over his head. He puts his hat back on and goes over to a treasure chest. It opens and Sam comes out]
 * Sam: You do not like them, so you say. Try them. Try them and you may. Try them and you may, I say.
 * Guy: Sam, if you would let me be, I will try them, and you will see. [He grabs one green egg with the fork. He covers his eyes with his hand as he takes a bite from one green egg and laughs after eating it] Say! [Eats more green eggs] I like green eggs and ham! I do! I like them, Sam-I-Am! [Singing] And I would eat them in a boat! And I would eat them with a goat! And I will eat them in the rain! And in the dark and on a train! And in a car and in a tree! They are so good! So good, you see! So I will eat them in a box! And I will eat them with a fox... [The cavalry bugle blares as the fox runs into view]
 * Fox: [Singing] He will eat them in a box! And he will eat them with a fox!
 * [The dogs from the cavalry come in and sing, along with the mouse and goat]
 * All: And he will eat them in a house! And he will eat them with a mouse! And he will eat them here or there! Say, he will eat them anywhere!
 * Guy: [After having eaten the whole plate] I do so like green eggs and ham. Thank you. Thank you, Sam-I-Am.

Voice cast

 * Allan Sherman - The Cat in the Hat
 * Hans Conried - Narrator / North-going Zax / South-going Zax / Fox
 * Paul Winchell - Sneetches / Sam-I-Am / Guy-Am-I
 * Bob Holt - Sneetches / Sylvester McMonkey McBean
 * The Ron Hicklin Singers - Sneetches (singing voices)