Dragon Ball: Tournament Saga

Dragon Ball is a Japanese anime that originally aired in Japan from February 26, 1986 - April 12, 1989 on Fuji TV. It is based on the original manga series established by Akira Toriyama. The English dub started in 1995 by FUNimation, which has partnered up with Trimark, for the first 13 episodes, then redubbed in August 20, 2001, along with the other 140 episodes, for a total of 153 episodes.

Goku's Rival

 * Goku: I'm here for training!
 * Master Roshi: (watching an exercise program) Now? Hold on. I'm doing my morning workout.




 * Master Roshi: I tell ya, Goku. Studying martial arts is no Sunday picnic.
 * Goku: I don't mind. I know I'll have to work hard to get stronger than you.
 * Master Roshi: Eh... heh heh. Really, kid... you could learn some manners.
 * Goku: Heh heh ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!
 * Master Roshi: But you know my lessons don't come free.
 * Goku: Huh?
 * Master Roshi: You must find me a young gal. It's the only way I can start training you.
 * Goku: Okay. But what's a gal?
 * Master Roshi: A gal! A fun girl I can go on a date with!
 * Goku: Oh! That's kinda weird. But, if I find this girl, then you'll train me?
 * Master Roshi: Ohh... yeah!
 * Goku: Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha! Yippee!
 * Master Roshi: Hold on there, Goku!
 * Goku: Huh?
 * Master Roshi: Are ya sure you know what to look for? A stallion like me has very particular taste!
 * Goku: You want someone who'll be your friend.
 * Master Roshi: Hmm... well, that'd be nice. But, I've got a few other guidelines. I'm a sucker for nice skin. She's not too young but not too old. And funny, too.
 * Goku: That's a lot. But what does her skin have to do with it?
 * Master Roshi: Uh...well... uh... I... uh... guess that's a lesson for another time.
 * Goku: Okay. I'll find you someone nice!
 * Master Roshi: That's my boy!




 * Master Roshi: Looks like your first lesson won't be in martial arts.
 * Goku: Aw, man!
 * Master Roshi: (raises two pictures, one of an ugly woman and one of a pretty woman) Now, eh... which one of these is prettier?
 * Goku: Hmm... I like both.
 * Master Roshi: What are you... a saint!? (pointing at the pretty woman's picture) Just get me one of these girls, you got it!?
 * Goku: Uh... I don't see the difference, but... okay!




 * Master Roshi: Do your legs hurt, 'cuz you've been runnin'... all through my dreams!
 * Mermaid: Pardon?
 * Master Roshi: Heh heh heh heh.
 * Mermaid: I don't have legs.
 * Master Roshi: Ah! So you're a mermaid, are you? Heh heh heh heh heh! (to himself) I knew there was somethin' fishy about this. I guess I can still try with her human half (to mermaid) Well, uh... I'm like a turtle, and you're part fish, so what do you say you and me go inside and learn more about our species! (The mermaid smacks Roshi and jumps into the water)
 * Goku: I get it. The lesson is to keep your guard up!
 * Master Roshi: Exactly...




 * Krillin: Doesn't seem that you like fighting...
 * Goku: I like marshmallows! Aha ha!
 * Krillin: What's that gotta do with anything?
 * Goku: Ha ha ha! Well, I'm hungry! And your bald head looks like one!
 * Krillin: What did you say!? Don't you know that everyone who's serious about martial arts shaves their head!? Look at Master Roshi! He shaves!
 * Master Roshi: Nope. I'm naturally bald.

Look out for Launch

 * Goku: (while they are on the flying Nimbus cloud) Hey, Krillin. Look. Do you think Master Roshi would like that lady over there?
 * Krillin: You mean I have to look down? (Krillin sees a fat farmer) Goku, that's a man...
 * Goku: Really? How can you tell? Gosh, they all look pretty much the same to me.
 * Krillin: Huh? You're joking right? I mean, you really can't tell the difference?
 * Goku: Well, usually I can figure it out. I just have to touch them first.
 * Krillin: Huh? In case you can't tell, I'm a boy.




 * Launch: Anyone else wanna call me their sweetheart!?




 * Goku: Hey, why does Master Roshi wanna meet a girl so bad anyway?
 * Krillin: Well, uh... I guess that he likes... uh... goin' on dates just as much as you like food.
 * Goku: You mean he's going to eat her?
 * Krillin: Uh... no, Goku. He's not.




 * Krillin: (Launch is about to get naked in front of everyone in order to change her clothing) Whoah! You can change in the house if you want!
 * Launch: Okay. Yes, that's a good idea. (Launch goes inside)
 * Master Roshi: Now why in the world did you have to bring that up!?
 * Krillin: I panicked.




 * Launch: (Launch sneezes and changes to her angry persona, finding that she's now wearing lingerie) Okay, boys! Who's idea was this? Wanna dress me like a doll? Well then please don't forget... the accessory machine gun! (Launch goes on a shooting rampage)

Find that Stone!

 * Master Roshi: Gee, all that running made my tongue dry. Goku, grab me a brewski!
 * Goku: Okay. What's a brewski?
 * Krillin: Don't worry, Master. I gotcha.
 * Master Roshi: Oh. Goku, I have many things to teach you besides fighting. Now, are you sure you weren't raised in a bubble?
 * Krillin: (Krillin enters the house) Launch, which way is our refrigerator? (searches through the house)
 * Launch: Careful! You're blowing up dust!
 * Krillin: What?!
 * Launch: Ah... Ah... Atchoo!
 * Goku: Huh?
 * Master Roshi: That's no yawn. (Launch chases Krillin with a butcher knife in her hand)
 * Launch: Slow down, ya little pig! Hows about I cook YOU for dinner?!




 * Krillin: The test is to throw stones?
 * Goku: Master Roshi, your training sure is kinda weird. (picks up a stone laying nearby)
 * Master Roshi: Throwing stones is not the test here.
 * Goku: Huh?
 * Krillin: Huh?
 * Master Roshi: The test is to find mine.
 * Goku: What?
 * Krillin: You mean the one you just threw?
 * Master Roshi: Anyone can throw a stone, just like anyone can throw a punch. But to find a stone takes a focused mind and a calm spirit. This is what will separate you from the others. And so, the person who finds it, can keep the stone, and the one who doesn't, can keep their appetite.
 * Krillin: You mean...
 * Goku: You mean...
 * Krillin: No supper!?
 * Goku: No supper!?
 * Krillin: Ah...ah!
 * Master Roshi: That's right! And if no one brings the stone back in thirty minutes, then neither of you gets to eat! Now hurry up boys, time's already started! Watch out for snakes!




 * Krillin: (after Goku finds the stone) How in the world did you find that, Goku?
 * Goku: It smells like Master Roshi.
 * Krillin: What are you, a dog?




 * Krillin: (after Krillin steals Goku's stone and challenges him for it) Let's roll! (Krillin and Goku are about to fight)
 * Goku: Ha! I'd love to!
 * Krillin: But first, you have to promise you won't cry to Master Roshi if I cause you death or permanent injury.
 * Goku: Sure! If you swear to fight once without cheating!




 * Master Roshi: (Master Roshi is reaching for Launch's buttocks as Krillin barges in and makes him angry) Do you time this?

Milk Delivery

 * Master Roshi: Krillin, wake up! It's time to get started! Early bird and the worm... uh... you know the saying.
 * Krillin: I don't even think the worms are awake yet...
 * Master Roshi: Nice try. Now stop talking and start dressing.




 * Launch: (to Goku) What are you doing in my bed, you pervert!?
 * Goku: I slept here, sir. We only have two blankets...
 * Launch: Grrr! Lame excuse, you little hedgehog! (pulls out her gun)




 * Master Roshi: We do not learn martial arts to pick fights or to impress girls who will say "Oh beefcake, you're so strong, I want you." Heh. Muah. (does a kissing motion) Do you understand what I am saying?
 * Krillin: Uhuh.
 * Master Roshi: We must master the art of peace in addition to the art of war. We achieve victory by the art of war, victory is won through strategy, strategy is derived from the art of peace.




 * Master Roshi: But, you will not go in there with hopes of winning the tournament the first time you compete. To do so would be arrogant! And arrogance is for fools, not warriors! So you will enter the tournament with the sole purpose of improving your fighting skills.




 * Bulma: (Yamcha is facing a powerful opponent) That beast is going to beat Yamcha!
 * Oolong: Well, don't blame the beast, Bulma. Yamcha did knock down twenty of his friends...

The Turtle Hermit Way

 * Krillin: (after Master Roshi tells him they have to dig in a farm) First we're the milkmen, and now we're stinkin' farmers. We never did this in Orin Temple.

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 * Orin Temple Monk: (about Krillin) So that's why the master kept him. He makes such an excellent punching bag!

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 * Krillin: (after Goku moves a huge boulder all by himself) Krillin wants everybody to know he's speechless right now.

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 * Krillin: (after Master Roshi tells Goku and Krillin to swim a few laps in a lake) I guess Master Roshi's rewarding us for good behavior.
 * Goku: Yeah, it's kinda like takin' a bath! Heh!
 * Master Roshi: Oh, you better watch out boys! There's some big fish in there!
 * Krillin: Huh? What kind o' big fish?
 * Master Roshi: Sharks, mostly.
 * Krillin: Huh?
 * Goku: Uh? (a huge shark approaches) Did you feel that? Uh...?
 * Krillin: Feel what? (The shark appears from underwater next to Krillin and Goku and they scream) Waaaah!
 * Goku: Waaaah!!!
 * Master Roshi: (as Krillin tries to evade the shark) That's not a lap, Krillin! You forgot to touch the other side of the shore!
 * Krillin: Are you kiddin' me!?

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 * Krillin: Master... please say our training isn't gonna be this difficult every single day.
 * Master Roshi: Of course not, Krillin. It will be much more difficult. For the next few months, you'll be doing the exact same training schedule as today, but you'll be wearing these stylish fifty pound turtle shells.

The Tournament Begins

 * Krillin: So, what do ya think, Goku? You think there's even a chance we won't get creamed at the tournament?
 * Goku: Who knows? Maybe all we have to do is pretend our opponents are like another day of construction work.

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 * Bulma: Yamcha, I was worried about you. For all I knew, you were dead in a ditch in a country you can't pronounce. You'll have to make this up to me. And you're going to enjoy it.

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 * Master Roshi: Okay, boys. Did you remember to pack your toothbrushes?
 * Krillin: Yes, sir.
 * Goku: Tooth-what?

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 * Goku: Oh, wow! It's like a flying house! What do they call this thing again?
 * Krillin: Airplane.
 * Goku: How neat!

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 * Goku: (The plane is landing during the night time, and Goku sees the lights below) Oh, no! Look, master! There's stars on the ground!
 * Master Roshi: Huh? Oh, don't worry. Those are city lights. We've arrived.
 * Goku: Wow. So they make stars in the city? You think they'll give me one, master?
 * Krillin: Caveman...

Elimination Round

 * Bulma: (while she's standing on top of Oolong's shoulders to see the elimination rounds) I could see inside!
 * Oolong: Great, Bulma. That's the important thing. I mean, who cares if my spine's cracking?

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 * Bulma: I'm not speaking to you, Oolong!
 * Oolong: What? After I defended you from that drooling army of perverts?
 * Bulma: Yeah, somehow I can't see it as honorable when you're getting free looks of your own.
 * Oolong: Come on, just think of it as payment for my services.

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 * Orin Temple Monk: What do we have here?
 * Orin Temple Monk 2: It's our old punching bag.
 * Krillin: Uh... hello...
 * Orin Temple Monk: It's been a long time since I've seen you, Krillin... when you ran crying out of the Orin Temple.
 * Krillin: Heh heh. Heh heh.
 * Orin Temple Monk 2: But look. His clothes are so pretty...
 * Orin Temple Monk: Now surely you're not trying to fight in the world martial arts tournament? (The Monk begins tapping on Krillin's head)
 * Krillin: Well... yeah... umm... like... I was thinking about it...
 * Orin Temple Monk: How horrible. Making all these real fighters waste their time on you.
 * Orin Temple Monk 2: Have you forgotten what we taught you? That runts are always runts!?
 * Krillin: No. I remember.

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 * Orin Temple Monk: You didn't run away this time. I can't say that's a healthy move, but at least you're less of a chicken!

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 * Yamcha: It's Wolf Fang Fist time!
 * Wolfman: You humans come up with the wildest names to make your moves sound tough. But I'll show you how the real wolf attacks.

Smells like Trouble

 * Krillin: Who's the stinkbucket?
 * Yamcha: That's Bacterian. He's got Herculean strength but that comes second to his offensive odor. They say he's never taken a bath since the day he was born. His opponents can only fight with one hand because the other one has to hold their nose. He takes advantage of this to win.
 * Krillin: That's a dirty trick.
 * Goku: I think I'm gonna pass out.

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 * Jackie Chun: Sonny?
 * Announcer: Yes? (Jackie Chun yanks Ranfan by the arm)
 * Ranfan: Hey!
 * Jackie Chun: Why don't you be a pal and put me in the ring with her?
 * Announcer: Uh?
 * Ranfan: Oh...
 * Announcer: Huh? I don't take requests!
 * Jackie Chun: (to himself) Young people are so unreasonable.

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 * Announcer: You lose if you fall outside of the ring, stay down for ten counts, or give up. But poking in the eyes or hitting in the private parts is not allowed.
 * Goku: What parts are private?
 * Announcer: You know what I mean... it's the things that makes us boys.
 * Ranfan: But what... about... my parts?
 * Announcer: Uh! Okay, everyone. I think that's enough questions for now. So just stay here and I'll come back when it's time.

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 * Goku: (after Bacterian performs a few disgusting and smelly moves) Krillin, hey! Focus your mind and you won't smell him! Just think about it. You don't have a nose, remember?
 * Krillin: Huh? Hey! He's right!

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 * Announcer: Well, if we learned anything from this match, it's that no matter how used you are to your own stench, you'll always be stunned by someone else's. Now I just hope they can clean up the arena.

Quarterfinals Continue

 * Giran: (to Goku) You took my food! No one does that! Rah! Rah! (Giran stomps a table, spilling more food)
 * Krillin: Uh?
 * Nam: Stop your wasting.
 * Giran: Grr...grr... I'd like to see you try and stop me, mister skin and bones!

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 * Bulma: I wonder what this mysterious Jackie Chun guy looks like.
 * Oolong: What's it to you, Bulma? I thought Yamcha was your boyfriend?
 * Bulma: He is. But I can still keep my eyes open for an upgrade.

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 * Jackie Chun: (after dodging Yamcha's attacks) Your fighting moves are big and fun to look at, but I'm afraid most of them are just a waste of energy.
 * Yamcha: I'll show you!

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 * Krillin: First it was that sewer-face and now I'm up against a superhero.

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 * Nam: I was warned that people in the city would try to trick me from my goal. But I swore that I wouldn't let anything stand in the way from saving the lives of my people!
 * Announcer: Uh oh! Nam's temper is rising! I'd say he's preparing for a big attack!
 * Ranfan: Oo! You're so brave.
 * Nam: Don't you make a mockery of me! (Nam attacks and Ranfan dodges. Ranfan reciprocates with a combination of attacks which are blocked by Nam)
 * Ranfan: Heh heh heh heh heh. Just one question.
 * Nam: Oh? (Ranfan strips off all her clothes except for her underwear and bra) Ahhh!!!
 * Jackie Chun: Yahhh!!!
 * Nam: Eee...!
 * Ranfan: You think pink's a good color on me?
 * Nam: Eee....
 * Ranfan: Eheh heh heh heh. You tough boys are all alike.

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 * Jackie Chun: Please step back, everyone! I'm a doctor! (as he is touching the unconscious Ranfan's buttocks) Okay, let me just... check for a... heartbeat.
 * Announcer: Excuse me, sir. I think you should go wait inside... Sir?

Monster Beast Giran

 * Orin Temple Monk: It's a shame that the tournament has come down to two kids, a guy old enough to be their grandfather, a peasant, and a monster who likes milk!
 * Orin Temple Monk 2: Yeah. This championship's a sham. I could beat them. Easy.

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 * Giran: Come here, mister handsome hero. Take care of the big bad monster.

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 * Orin Temple Monk: (after they are easily beaten by Giran) Remind me never to attack any ten foot monsters again.
 * Orin Temple Monk 2: Yeah... me too...

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 * Giran: (after spitting out and entrapping Goku in his gooey substance) How do you like Giran's merry-go-round gum?
 * Goku: Oh no!
 * Giran: That's right! Go ahead and struggle, kid. The harder you try, the tighter it gets. Face it. You're stuck. Right where I want you.

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 * Giran: (to Goku) I'm going to knock the living hoo-ha out of you, you little nuisance of a kid! Argh! Time's up! Just close your eyes! This is only gonna hurt for a second!

Krillin's Frantic Attack

 * Jackie Chun: It's rare that I find a fighter who can follow my movements.
 * Krillin: It comes natural. I was trained by the best. Master Roshi's my teacher.
 * Jackie Chun: Let's see if your master's training can get you through this one.
 * Krillin: Whenever you're ready.

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 * Jackie Chun: How many of you ladies out there love me? Alright! A boo boo boo boo! A dee dee dee! I know you ladies love me! Because I am so studly! Alright! Eheh! Ow! I know I'm causin' a reaction! But that's cause I'm the main attraction! Come on now, ladies, can't you see that a martial artist's life is the only life for me!

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 * Krillin: It looked like it was going to be germ warfare, but the Bacterian fight got me ready for that.

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 * Jackie Chun: (after Krillin tosses women's underwear in the ring and Chun jumps for it, resulting in his getting kicked sky high into the air by Krillin) Kids, you just can't trust 'em nowadays!

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 * Yamcha: (after trying to yank out Jackie Chun's hair, suspecting that he's really Master Roshi) I get it now! You've had hair the whole time! You've just been covering it up with a bald cap!
 * Jackie Chun: How do we know that you're not Master Roshi wearing an ugly mask!

Danger from Above

 * Nam: I was certain I had lost this match. Fate has given me another chance to win.

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 * Nam: I will strike like a lightning bolt from the sky!

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 * Nam: Young warrior, I have no desire to harm you. I do this only because it is my duty to help my people.

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 * Nam: It is against my way to harm any creature. You will regain consciousness in eight to ten days.

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 * Oolong: Hey, kid! Remember, before you ever got famous, I was your best buddy!
 * Bulma: And I discovered him!
 * Puar: Me too!
 * Yamcha: Hah! Man! Win or lose, Goku's already made it in the history books. I have to take my hat off to the kid. Hah!
 * Jackie Chun: Yes, indeed. He's a remarkable young man. To accomplish what he's accomplished at his age is truly extraordinary.

The Grand Finals

 * Jackie Chun: Sorry to put your lights out like that, Goku, but it had to end sometime.

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 * Yamcha: Don't be fooled, Goku. He's using the drunken boxing technique. He's only pretending to be tipsy.
 * Goku: Tipsy?

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 * Jackie Chun: Having some trouble, Goku? Yes, it's hard to drunken box if you've never been drunk before!

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 * Goku: Crazy monkey technique!

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 * Jackie Chun: I'm not out of this yet. In fact, I've already won.
 * Goku: You have?

Number One Under the Moon

 * Jackie Chun: (after putting Goku to sleep by hypnotizing him) The sleepy boy technique. Eheh heh heh heh heh. I win.
 * Announcer: Uh... Hold on. That was hypnotism. You're supposed to use martial arts in this tournament.
 * Jackie Chun: Oh... come on. The sleepy boy is a martial arts classic. Now just count to ten, will ya?
 * Announcer: But just think of how the fans are going to react if we end the tournament this way. Kind of anticlimactic, you know?
 * Jackie Chun: Who cares about the fans? It's the kid's own darn fault for falling for such a thing anyway. Now start counting or I'll sleepy boy you!
 * Announcer: Oh gosh!

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 * Bulma: Goku, we'll go and eat a big dinner as soon as you beat that smelly Jackie Chun!
 * Goku: Okay! Aha ha ha ha ha! Then, I'd better hurry and get this over with!

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 * Jackie Chun: Darn you! It's no time to be stubborn when your life is at stake!

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 * Yamcha: There's no use trying to talk to 'im! When Goku changes like that, he loses all sense of himself! He's just a big ape with a sweet tooth for tearing people's limbs off!
 * Krillin: Oh, is that all?

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 * Jackie Chun: I'm sorry. I only did what had to be done.

The Final Blow

 * Jackie Chun: Well, with the moon destroyed, it can't possibly get full again, so Goku won't turn into a big ape. Heh heh heh. Sometimes, I'm so clever, it amazes even me.
 * Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, Jackie Chun has done a reprehensible thing.
 * Jackie Chun: Huh?
 * Announcer: What's going to light up the skies for us at night? What about romantic moonlit walks? And you can just say goodbye to relaxing oceanwave CD's. And what about the Wolfman? What will he howl at?
 * Jackie Chun: Stop being a goof and start counting!

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 * Fat Woman: (seeing Goku completely naked) I shouldn't look, but I am.

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 * Jackie Chun: We've both done every fancy tricks our body can handle. It looks like we'll have to rely on good old karate chops and flying kicks to finish this. The strongest man will stay standing. It's as simple as that.
 * Goku: Sounds like fun to me.

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 * Yamcha: (about Master Roshi) Where is he?
 * Bulma: Did you try the ladies room?

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 * Krillin: Goku got robbed at the end. He would've won if he hadn't been so hungry.
 * Goku: I don't know about that, Krillin. Jackie was pretty strong. I still don't think I could've beat him.
 * Master Roshi: That's for sure. You've got lots to learn before you're up to his level and plenty of others are just as strong! There's a whole dimension of fighting techniques that you don't know yet. All training so far has been child's play. The real stuff is yet to come.
 * Krillin: Right!
 * Goku: Right!
 * Master Roshi: (to himself) I should start recording my speeches and sell them.

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 * Goku: (after ferociously eating a lot of restaurant food) I sure was hungry!
 * Bulma: He just ate fifty seven full course meals!
 * Yamcha: Really? I lost track around forty.
 * Goku: Can I have another bowl please? (everyone gets shocked)
 * Master Roshi: I think you've had enough for one day.
 * Goku: Yeah, you're right. I probably should save room for some dessert. (everyone collapses from shock)