Killer Klowns from Outer Space

Killer Klowns From Outer Space is a 1988 film about aliens, who look like clowns, that come from outer space in their circus-tent shaped spaceship to terrorize a small town.
 * Directed by Stephen Chiodo. Written by Charles Chiodo, Edward Chiodo, and Stephen Chiodo.

In Space, No One Can Eat Ice Cream! Taglines

Farmer Gene Green

 * [after just witnessing the blinding light] Well I'll be hornswaggled! Did you see that little ole sky doggy zip down there, Pooh? [Looks at his comic]] Haley's Comet! And it's landed in our backyard! [Excitedly runs into his house to get his shovel, axe, and pick]] This is out lucky day! We gonna be rich! Pooh, we gonna be rich! Thousands of people are comin'! Gonna have hot dogs and helicopters and airplanes and tacos! This is our lucky day! Pooh, we gonna be rich!


 * [Encountering the Big Top] Well I'll be greased and fried! What in blue blazes is the circus doing here in these parts? I love the circus! Come on! Maybe we can get some free passes. [Noticing the purple lights on the tent's cables] I've never seen one that looked like this 'un before. Well... I don't know Pooh, you know there's something kinda peculiar around here. Where is everybody? There's nobody around. Where's the dang ticket booth? [A shadow from inside the tent follows them] How are we supposed to get in and see the show?


 * [Discovering Pooh has been dognapped] What in tarnation is going on here! Where's my dog?! Where's my Pooh Bear?! I'LL TEAR THIS THING APART WITH MY BARE HANDS!!!

Curtis Mooney

 * They took your wife away in a balloon? Well you don't need the police, pal, you need a psychiatrist!


 * I made it through Korea I can make it through this bullshit!


 * I'm supposed to read you your rights. But you're in Mooney's jail, and you ain't got no rights!

Others

 * Amusement Park Guard: What are ya gonna do with those pies, boys?


 * Paul Terenzi: [as Jo-Jo The Ice Cream Clown] I'm Jo-Jo the ice cream clown with the bestest ice cream in town! We'll give you a stick, you'll give it a lick. And it'll tickle you all the way down. Ice cream! ice cream! We brought our goodies here to you! A tasty treat for while you screw! Let's take a break! Cool off those hot lips with our frozen fruity bars! Icy-Wicies, Fudgy-Wudgy bars. And everyone's frozen delight, the Lick-a-Stick!


 * Debbie Stone: Nobody's gonna put me in a balloon again!

Dialogue

 * [Watching the stars, suddenly a bright light appears and disappears]
 * Mike Tobacco: Did you see that?
 * Debbie Stone: Yeah I saw that! That was incredible!


 * [Mike and Debbie are inside the alien's "circus tent"]
 * Mike Tobacco: God, is this place great, or what? I mean, it looks like it was decorated by "Clowns R Us"!
 * Debbie Stone: [Feeling a little uneasy] I don't know...
 * Mike Tobacco: Hey, didn't you ever want to run away and join the circus?
 * Debbie Stone: I wanted to run away from the circus.
 * Mike Tobacco: How come?
 * Debbie Stone: When I was five years old, my mom and my dad took me to the circus for the first time. Lion tamers, acrobats, tightrope walkers... I guess they were okay. But then, this little car drove up... and stopped right in front of me. Out jumped this huge clown. He jumped over to me... he lifted me right up out of my seat. Everybody was laughing, even my parents. Then he threw me up on his shoulders and he... he ran me out in the center ring. And all the other clowns started dancing around me... honking their horns and squeaking their noses. Their cakey white faces, and yellow eyes and dingy teeth, were tormenting me. I was terrified. I will never forget those horrible smiling faces as long as I live. Ugh!
 * Mike Tobacco: Hey, don't worry. Nothing in here is going to hurt you.


 * Debbie Stone: We were up at "the top of the world" and we saw this shooting star and we decided to go look for it! But instead of finding the shooting star we saw this... this circus tent! And that's when we went inside and that is when we saw those people in those... those pink, cotton candy cocoons! Dave, it was not a circus tent! It was something else!
 * Dave Hanson: What?! What?!
 * Mike Tobacco: It was a spaceship! And there was these things! These killer clowns! And they shot popcorn at us! We barely got away!
 * Curtis Mooney: Killer clowns from outer space? Holy shit!


 * Paul Terenzi: Mike, what do you want us to do? We've got ice cream to sell tonight.
 * Mike Tobacco: Paul, this is more serious than selling ice cream. There's clowns going around killing people. We're all in danger.


 * Slug: [to Tricycle Klown] Mean bike you got there.
 * [bikers laugh mockingly]
 * Slug: Can I take a ride... pal?
 * [Klown shakes head no]
 * Slug: Can I beep the horn?
 * [Klown shakes head yes]
 * Slug: [sarcastically joyous] Oh, thank you!
 * [proceeds to smash Klown's bike, bikers laugh uproariously]
 * Black Biker: Shoulda' let the man ride his bike.
 * [more laughter]
 * Slug: [sarcastically remorseful] I'm sorry, I... I seem to have broken your bike. [as Tricycle Klown raises his fists] What are you gonna do... knock my block off?
 * [Klown knocks Slug's head into a trash can]
 * Black Biker: [amid screams from bikers] Damn!


 * Debbie Stone: Do you think it's over?
 * Mike Tobacco: Yeah, sure.

Taglines

 * In Space, No One Can Eat Ice Cream!


 * Alien Bozos With An Appetite For Close Encounters.


 * Horrific Harlequins With An Appetite For Close Encounters!


 * Big Top...Big Shoes...Big Teeth!!


 * (from trailer) Killer Klowns From Outer Space...It's Crazy!

Cast

 * Grant Cramer - Mike Tobacco
 * Suzanne Snyder - Debbie Stone
 * John Allen Nelson - Dave Hanson
 * John Vernon - Curtis Mooney
 * Michael Siegel - Rich Terenzi
 * Peter Licassi - Paul Terenzi
 * Royal Dano - Farmer Gene Green
 * Christopher Titus - Bob McReed
 * Charles Chiodo - 'Klownzilla' the King Klown