King of the Hill (season 12)


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King of the Hill (1997-2010) was an American animated sitcom that aired on Fox. The show centers around the Hill family, whose head is the ever-responsible, hard-working, loyal, disciplined, and honest Hank Hill.

Bobby gay [12.2]
(Bobby and all of his classmates are marching down the street protesting).
 * Old Man 1: Here they come to kill us. Oh well.
 * Old Man 2: I liked it when we could just stick 'em in factories.


 * Alejandro: We want a plane to Disney World. And 100 gallons of diesel fuel!
 * Olivia: And we're not leaving until we get some Yuengling!

The Powder Puff Boys [12.3]
Joseph is dressed as a Powder Puff cheerleader and is told to redress into his normal clothing.
 * Gwibble: the fan who threw the dildo on the field Violated a social norm

Four Wave Intersection [12.4]

 * Hank: Hey Bobby. How was the surf today? Did Boomhauer do his famous flamingo? That's when he stands on one leg, that's not easy to do, even on the ground.
 * Bobby: No, all he did was fall flat on his face and embarrass himself, and us by association, we didn't even get to ride the wave.
 * Hank: Boomhauer was embarrassed? I don't know what the heck's going on here but someone needs to get their asses kicked.
 * Bobby: Finally. Yes. Thank you. It's time to kick their local asses!
 * Hank: Bobby, language. But, yes. I am going to kick their asses.

Death Picks Cotton [12.5]

 * Cotton:(After kicking down a wall Hank just finished making) "That was in my way!"
 * Peggy: It's okay. I'm here, you can go now. Go, go into the light. The light is good. You can just let go now.
 * Cotton: Mr. Reaper, I'd prefer that you put your hood back on.
 * Peggy: Why won't you die?
 * Cotton: This was supposed to happen to you. You're worthless. You're not even good enough to be married to my worthless nothing of a loser son!
 * Peggy: Enough! Your son has always loved you despite your constant torture. You want to die alone? Fine. You want to keep coming back and never die? That's fine too. In fact, I hope you do go on living forever as the unhappy person you are in the hell you have created here on this earth. I hope you live forever. I really do.
 * Cotton: Oh, do you, now? (cackles, then dies as his heart monitor goes off)


 * Dale: (After blowing up the shack that Hank just built because Hank's father wanted it destroyed) "Yee-haw! That was for you colonel!" (runs off)

Raise the Steaks [12.6]

 * Hank: [Presses his tongs into the steak cooking on the grill] Firm but with a little give. Yup, these are medium-rare.
 * Bobby: What if somebody wants theirs well-done?
 * Hank: We ask them politely, yet firmly, to leave.

Strangeness on a Train [12.19]

 * Lucky: Lucky is on the case. That's usually what I say when I drink beer, but this time it refers to this mystery.


 * Kahn: Lucky Kleinschmidt,it was you and Luanne wasn't it? You trying to get in as much hanky-panky as you can before she has her baby?
 * Lucky: Not that there's anything wrong with your premise but no, it wasn't us.
 * Luanne: We haven't done in public since Lucky almost fell off a Ferris wheel.

(Kahn trying to find out who had sex in a train lavatory)
 * Bill: I don't have an alibi.
 * Kahn: You're Bill Dauterive, that's your alibi.


 * Lucky: You really enjoyed yourself this evening, didn't you Aunt Peggy?
 * Peggy: (gasps) You know?
 * Lucky: Good for you. Happy Birthday Aunt Peggy.

The Accidental Terrorist [12.13]

 * Hank Hill: He was behind you the last time it broke down. Well, that's lucky, I-I guess.




 * Hank Hill: Stop it, Tom! It's all over! I know.
 * Tom Hammond: You know what, buddy?
 * Hank Hill: That you've been selling me a bag of lies for the last twenty-five years. How could you, Tom?
 * Tom Hammond: Well, what can I say, Hank? I'm a salesman.


 * Dale Gribble: Well, Joseph went to his first sleepover last night. Didn't go so well, he's a cuddler, so I had to go pick him up.

After Dale tells Hank he saw him driving away from the explosion:
 * Peggy Hill: (Whispers) Oh, Hank! You must cover your tracks! We'll have to kill Dale!


 * Bobby Hill: Dad, I'm confused. So you should trust people until they betray you, and then try to blow them up?


 * Hank Hill: The only thing I'm guilty of is trusting you. Well, I'll tell you one thing: I may go to jail, but I’ve zipped my lips for the last time.

Who the fuck do you think you are?.