MacGruber (film)

MacGruber is a 2010 SNL action-comedy film. The Ultimate Tool (taglines)

MacGruber

 * I'm in.
 * If ripping throats gets that warhead back, I'll suck as many dicks as I've go— I'll rip as many throats as I have to!
 * You're loco, man!
 * Subtited: You're crazy, man!
 * Never ever say 'never ever'.
 * Pound some Cunth.
 * I got a better idea, no fucking way!
 * I bet you wish your nose was a dick so you could fuck butts!
 * Classic Macgruber
 * That was fuckin' tits
 * Just tell me what you want me to fuck!

Dialogue

 * Vicki: I'm a virgin.
 * MacGruber: Not for long.


 * MacGruber: I just took an upper-decker in the master bathroom.
 * Vicki: Upper-decker?
 * MacGruber: Yeah, it's where you take a shit in the water tank and not the bowl- You look great.


 * MacGruber: Don't worry we got your back. We're only seven blocks away. So if anything goes down-
 * Vicki: Seven blocks?
 * MacGruber: [laughing] Okay, you got me. About twenty blocks.
 * Vicki: Wasn't there anything closer?
 * MacGruber: Nope.
 * Dixon: There were tons of spots closer.
 * MacGruber: Yeah! With meters!


 * [MacGruber is trying to defuse a nuclear warhead]
 * Vicki: Can you defuse it?
 * MacGruber: Are you kidding me? Look at all this crap! There's like a million wires in here. I'm more like a three wire guy!


 * [Vicki and MacGruber are driving away from an assassination attempt, believing Dixon, who is in the back to be dead]
 * Vicki: Is he dead?!
 * MacGruber: YES! HE'S DEAD!
 * [Dixon gets up]
 * Dixon: Jesus...
 * MacGruber: AHHHHHHHH!
 * Dixon: How did you know I was wearing a bulletproof vest?
 * MacGruber: You were wearing a bulletproof vest? ... Awesome!


 * Vicki: [dressed like MacGruber] If you're the one they want to come after why can't you be dressed like you?
 * MacGruber: Because...you are!


 * Dixon: [using a phone tracer] Now remember, MacGruber. You gotta keep him on the line long enough to get a location.
 * MacGruber: Don't worry, I've done this before. [to the phone] Now listen to me you piece of sh- he hung up. Did you get it?
 * Vicki: No.
 * MacGruber: Damn it! Is that thing working?

Tagline

 * The Ultimate Tool
 * Do Not Underestimate This Man

Cast

 * Will Forte - MacGruber
 * Kristen Wiig - Vicki Gloria St. Elmo
 * Ryan Phillippe - Lt. Dixon Piper
 * Powers Boothe - Col. Jim Faith
 * Val Kilmer - Dieter Von Cunth
 * Maya Rudolph - Casey Janine Fitzpatrick
 * Chris Jericho - Frank Korver
 * Montel Vontavious Porter - Vernon Freedom
 * The Great Khali - Tug Phelps
 * The Big Show - Brick Hughes
 * Mark Henry - Tut Beemer
 * Kane - Tanker Lutz
 * Andy Mackenzie - Hoss Bender
 * Derek Mears - Large henchman
 * Rhys Coiro - Yerik Novikov
 * Jasper Cole - Zeke Pleshette
 * Kevin Skousen - Senator Garver
 * Brandon Trost - Brick's boyfriend
 * Jason Trost - Smoking guard
 * Amar'e Stoudemire - himself
 * Chris Kittinger - Man in tux
 * DJ Nu-Mark (uncredited) - Club DJ