Mermaids (1990 film)

Mermaids is a 1990 American comedy-drama film, set in 1963, about a carefree single mother who uproots her family every time her love life goes awry. When she and her daughters relocate to a small town in Massachusetts, the family encounters a series of events that test and strengthen their bonds with one another.
 * Written by June Roberts. Directed by Richard Benjamin, based on Patty Dann's book of the same name.

This is our mother. Pray for us. taglines

Charlotte Flax

 * A word about Mrs. Flax and food: the word is "hors d'oeurves". "Fun Finger Foods" is her main source book and that's all the woman cooks. Anything more, she says, is too big a commitment.
 * [narrating] Please, God, let him throw me on the ground and make another Joey Junior.
 * I may be pregnant with the next Jewish-Italian Messiah!
 * [everyone in town is stricken by the news of President Kennedy's assassination] It feels like there isn't a single adult left on the entire planet.
 * So Joe, tell me about the nuns in the convent. Do they wear underwear in the shower? [narrating] I don't believe I said that.
 * Oh, I'm going to hell for sure. Here he is, talking about his poor dead mother and I can't help wishing his hands were unbuttoning my dress!

Rachel Flax

 * OK, I've had a little scotch...I'm real calm.
 * Death is dwelling on the past or staying in one place too long!
 * [Charlotte is praying at a shrine she has made in her room to the Virgin Mary] Charlotte, we're Jewish.
 * [to Charlotte as she goes out to spend time with Joe] Don't do anything I wouldn't do…[pause] Or don't do anything I would!
 * [Charlotte has a newfound obsession with Greek mythology] Charlotte, we're Jewish.

Kate Flax

 * [to her sister] Act your age, not your shoe size.
 * [wanting a glass of wine] Hit me, Sergeant!

Dialogue

 * Lou Landsky: If you care about us, would it kill you to show it?
 * Rachel: "Us"? When did YOU and *my* children become "us"? You're just YOU, Lou - me and the girls, THAT'S "us”!
 * Lou Landsky: I was talking about you and me.


 * Rachel: Charlotte, you drive like old people make love.
 * Charlotte: Mom, I'm only 15. I get nervous.
 * Rachel: Driving happens to be one of the two most important skills a woman could have. You should be tickled pink that I taught you early.


 * Charlotte: [narrating] Oh, God, please let Mrs. Flax control herself.
 * Lou Landsky: You're still a perfect seven, Reverend Mother. You know, most women's feet get bigger.
 * Rachel: Only if they marry.
 * Charlotte: [narrating] Oh, no!
 * Rachel: You know, your feet swell. When you get pregnant, your feet swell.
 * [Charlotte is mortified]
 * Charlotte: [narrating] How could she? How could she?
 * Rachel: I know mine got swollen when I was pregnant.
 * Charlotte: [whispering] Mother, how could you say that? She's a holy vessel!


 * Rachel: [wearing a mermaid costume for the New Year's Eve party] All right, I can tell by my mermaid watch that it's time for me to get in my mermaid car and hit the mermaid road!
 * Kate: And get the mermaid outta here!


 * Mother Superior: Yes, dear?
 * [Charlotte stands in front of her, smiling awkwardly]
 * Charlotte: [narrating] I desperately wanted to ask her what color her bra was and if she had pure thoughts every second of the day, but…
 * [Charlotte is unable to speak]


 * Kate: When I die, I want to be sprinkled in the ocean. I don't care if a whale eats me. I could live inside a whale like Jonah with an angel guard.
 * Rachel: Girls…
 * Charlotte: Yeah, well, what if you get a whale that doesn't have a living room inside him and you end up in someone's tuna fish sandwich?


 * Rachel: You know, Charlotte, I think you might be old enough for a boyfriend now.
 * Charlotte: If I'm old enough, maybe you're too old.
 * Rachel: Don't be ridiculous. A real woman is never too old.


 * Charlotte: What are you doing?
 * Kate: Sucking out the pimentos. They give me hernias.
 * Charlotte: You mean hives, fish-head.


 * Charlotte: [wearing heavy makeup] OK, how do I look?
 * Kate: Like someone drew all over you.


 * Dr. Reynolds: [after examining Charlotte, who thinks she is pregnant after kissing Joe] Has your mother ever talked to you about sex?
 * Charlotte: [narrating] Please, God, I want to die.
 * [to the doctor]
 * Charlotte: Yeah, all the time.
 * Dr. Reynolds: So you do know how babies are conceived?
 * Charlotte: Oh, yeah. We talk about everything. She's a wonderful mother.
 * Dr. Reynolds: Then why did you think you were pregnant? You're still a virgin.
 * Charlotte: [narrating] I want to die now. Right now.


 * [Charlotte is going fishing with Joe]
 * Joe: Do you want to bait your own hook or do you want me to do it?
 * Charlotte: [narrating] Mary, mother of God... he still wants to fish?


 * Charlotte: I want to stay!
 * Rachel: And do what?
 * Charlotte: Finish high school!
 * Rachel: Great start! What's your major, town tramp?
 * Charlotte: No, Mom, the town already has one.
 * [Rachel slaps her]

Taglines

 * Mom Is Many Things...Normal Isn't One of Them.

Cast

 * Cher - Rachel Flax
 * Winona Ryder - Charlotte Flax
 * Christina Ricci - Kate Flax
 * Bob Hoskins - Lou Landsky
 * Michael Schoeffling - Joe Peretti
 * Rex Trailer - Dr. Reynolds
 * Jan Miner - Mother Superior