Mr. Baseball (film)

Mr Baseball is a 1992 American sports comedy film about a New York Yankees player suddenly traded to the Chunichi Dragons of Japan's Nippon Professional Baseball and now has to adjust to Japanese culture.
 * Directed by Fred Schepisi. Written by Theo Pelletier, John Junkerman, Gary Ross, Kevin Wade, and Monte Merrick.

He's the biggest thing to hit Japan since Godzilla.taglines

Jack Elliot

 * [in Japanese talking to players during a lull in training] I would like to apologize to you all. From now on, I would like to make an effort, to be a real member of the team. And between us, I'd like to build... a chopstick [Yoji signals him to speak that last one differently] ..an edge. A bridge? Build a bridge of friendship. [bows deeply to the team]

Dialogue

 * [Jack Elliot is flustered that the Yankees are ditching him for a rookie first baseman]
 * Jack Elliot: I don't believe this. I'm a World Series MVP!
 * Skip: That was four years ago, Jack.
 * Trey: You hit .235 last season.
 * Elliot: Last season? I led this club in 9th-inning doubles in the month of August! Screw it man, I don't wanna play where I'm not wanted here. [throws off his cap] What are my choices? I'm ready.
 * Skip: [clears throat] There aren't exactly choices, Jack. We only had one taker so we... took.
 * Trey: We called everyone, Jack, Canada...
 * Elliot: No, not Canada!
 * Skip: [as Elliot talks] It goes without saying.
 * Elliot: I ain't paying those taxes!
 * Trey: [laughs] It's not Canada.
 * Elliot: Not Cleveland... No! Say it's not Cleveland!
 * Trey: [looks at Skip] Not Cleveland.
 * Skip: [clears throat] We got a call from a manager in...
 * Elliot: What?
 * Skip: ...Japan.
 * Elliot: Japan?
 * Skip: Yes, the uh... chu-chey? chu?
 * Elliot: Hey.. Forget it!
 * Skip: Chunichi.
 * Elliot: No. I'm a Major Leaguer! There's no way I'm gonna play in Japan!
 * Skip: If you wanna play this season Jack, you're a Chunichi Dragon.
 * Elliot: A Chunichi Dragon?


 * [Jack Elliot tries to imagine a grand entrance at Nagoya Stadium]
 * Jack Elliot: [addresses some Japanese at the bleachers] Any of you guys speak Americano? Jack Elliot here bringing you the best in Major League thrills for the fellas, and free mustache rides for the ladies.
 * Woman in Orange jacket: I have seen "free mustache rides" offered on t-shirts in America. Always by guys you would not want to ride with.
 * Elliot: [removes hat in respect] Sorry.


 * [After the Chunichi Dragons lose to the Yomiuri Giants at home, Jack notices Uchiyama-san facing the Dragons' executive committee]
 * Chunichi Dragons GM Hiroshi Nakamura: He is becoming an embarrassment to us. You do not appear to have found the answer to the Giants.
 * Uchiyama: As usual they stand between us and the pennant. I beg your patience.
 * Nakamura: Our patience is running out. And your CONTRACT is running out. [the executives leave]


 * [During a Dragons away match against the Hiroshima Carp, Jack rushes the pitcher who belatedly tipped his hat after hitting him in the head.]
 * Max DuBois: [pulls him away] Jack, dammit he tipped his hat, it means he didn't mean it!
 * Jack: I don't care if he ate his GODDAMN HAT!!! I've had it!
 * Yoji: Jack-san, no!
 * Jack: Bullshit! [tries to the punch the pitcher... but Yoji is knocked out instead] Yoji!!
 * Max: I'm sick and tired of this shit. Haven't you heard a word I said? You're really pissing me off now! [puts down Jack] Now just take your base and get with the program!
 * Jack: You too, huh Max?
 * Max: [points at Jack] You know the one thing I didn't miss about playing in the States? It's putting up with hotshots like you. Now I don't even have that anymore! [walks off]
 * [at the dugout, the Dragons GM confronts Uchiyama]
 * Chunichi Dragons GM Hiroshi Nakamura: [coldly] Suspend Elliot indefinitely... and consider yourself out as soon as a replacement is found. You have brought dishonor to the team! [leaves]


 * [At the meal with Uchiyama-san's parents alongside Hiroko and Uchiyama-san himself, Jack notices something the grandfather said]
 * Jack Elliot: What did he say?
 * Hiroko Uchiyama: He says, "You have a hole in your swing."
 * Elliot: Like father, like son huh?
 * Uchiyama: [in English] Everybody can see it but you.
 * Hiroko Uchiyama: [to her father, in Japanese] Why do you always put people down? You always do! [stands up] And try to fit everybody in the same mold! [walks off]
 * Uchiyama: [in Japanese] Hiroko, sit down!
 * Hiroko: [to her father] Try a little understanding! [Jack smiles at Hiroko standing up to her father] and you, Jack... [Jack looks at the mention of his name] Grow up! [leaves]


 * [Elliot jogs up and down the homefield bleachers]
 * Elliot: You look thirsty, Chief. What do you say I buy ya a beer?
 * Uchiyama: Later! AGAIN!
 * Elliot: [mutters] You're no fun anymore...
 * Uchiyama: C'mon, c'mon, c'mon! Pick it up! Pick it up! Harder! Harder, Jack!
 * Ryoh Mukai: [as the other players come out on the field for practice, in Japanese] Looks like Elliot's run out of excuses.


 * [At the Concepts Graphics Design office, a colleague still sees Hiroko Uchiyama at her desk in the late afternoon and asks her why still be there on the day of the Central League championships]
 * Hiroko Uchiyama: [in Japanese] I'm working.
 * Colleague: But the game is about to start, aren't you going?
 * Hiroko: No... Foreigner charming, foreigner romantic... foreigner going home to America.
 * Colleague: [humbling] I'm so sorry. [bows]
 * Hiroko: No, it's ok.
 * Colleague: I'll see you! [leaves]
 * Hiroko: See you.


 * [The day after the game, Hiroko Uchiyama receives someone at the door of her apartment - it's her father]
 * Uchiyama-san: Can I come in? [Hiroko lets him enter; looks around] Nice place! I have come on behalf of Jack. [presses button on stereo remote; music plays but he turns off] He wants you to know... [radio continues but he turns it off] He loves you and wants to discuss the future with you, when your "jets are cool."
 * Hiroko Uchiyama: But he's like you, father. He will not change.
 * Uchiyama-san: Changes occurring all around. Perhaps you should listen first.
 * Hiroko: He is a foreign ball player
 * Uchiyama: Who you are in love with.
 * Hiroko: It doesn't matter.
 * Uchiyama-san: It does matter... More than anything, doesn't it? [offers paper bag he brought] This is for you.
 * Hiroko: [sees item] Very nice of him.
 * Uchiyama-san: It's not from him, it's from me. From now on... I want to speak to you from my heart with no holding back.
 * Hiroko: [slightly emotional] Father. [they embrace]

Taglines

 * He's the biggest thing to hit Japan since Godzilla.
 * An inspirational baseball movie.

Cast

 * Tom Selleck - Jack Elliot
 * Ken Takakura - Uchiyama
 * Aya Takahashi - Hiroko Uchiyama
 * Dennis Haysbert - Max "The Hammer" DuBois
 * Toshi Shioya - Yoji Nishimura
 * Toshizo Fujiwara - Ryoh Mukai, Chunichi Dragons No 2