MythBusters

MythBusters is a science entertainment television program on Discovery Channel starring Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman, two special-effects experts who set out to test the validity of timeless myths and urban legends of popular culture.

Jet-Assisted Chevy, Pop Rocks and Soda

 * Jamie: These are actually more powerful than the JATOs—
 * Adam: But they're smaller; how's that possible?
 * Jamie: Well, we're gonna use more of them.


 * [The '67 Impala they just bought has broken down on an onramp.]
 * Adam: We are 8.5 miles from where we bought the car.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's 100 degrees, we're three hours from the shop, and—thanks to a blocked fuel filter—our rocket car is doing exactly…zero miles per hour. Thank goodness Adam's got the gold breakdown package.


 * [Adam's cellphone rings in the middle of his work.]
 * Adam: Who the hell could be calling me? I can't answer that, I'm tying a pig stomach into a skeleton.

Vacuum Toilet, Biscuit Bazooka, Leaping Lawyer

 * Jamie: [To Kari] That's probably the best shot that you'll ever see of your own butt.


 * Jamie: She'll have a huge hicky!
 * Adam: A huge butt hicky. It is hard to explain.


 * Adam: I've only never broken one bone in my body—my neck.

Larry's Lawn-Chair Balloon, Goldfinger, Poppy-Seed Drug Test

 * [After they've inflated over 40 weather balloons for the test.]
 * Jamie: I think we've used up all the helium in the Bay Area.


 * [In the opening to the Goldfinger myth.]
 * Adam: Tub of body latex: $22 . Tub of gold pigment: $6. Watching your friend get naked, covered in gold paint and then jogging until he passes out: Priceless!

2003

 * 2003 season

Octopus Egg Pregnancy

 * Adam: Yes Honey! That Is An Octopus Hickey!

Killer Washing Machine

 * Adam: How many of you have ever seen a washing machine... naked?


 * Adam: What's that? That can't be that necessary, I don't recognize it!


 * Adam: Basically now I'm about to pour the dog wee on the pile of baking soda, which, if the myth is correct, should cause a small explosion, or, if we're actually on Earth, will do absolutely bupkis.


 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Some of last season's fashions are packed around his legs.
 * Adam: (in a strange accent) I told you no colors with the whites!


 * Adam: Get me the Jack Russell terrier urine! That oughta do it! They're hyper little creatures.

Explosive Decompression

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): You know a rock band has made it when they get their own private jet. The MythBusters know they've made it when they get to destroy their own private jet.

Rear Axle

 * Jamie: Since he's already dirty, he's been kind enough to...spare me.
 * Adam: That's how his shirt stays white. I do all the dirty work!


 * Adam: I reject your reality, and substitute my own!


 * Adam: An empty car doing doughnuts and a police car with its lights flashing...Nah, I checked. There's nothing more fun than that.


 * Jamie: [In a bored voice] When will the fun ever stop?

Frog Giggin'

 * Adam: (very fast): Jamie! Jamie! Can I try it this time? Can I blow the bullet up? can I? Can I? really I can try.
 * Jamie: Shut up and set the bullet off.

Goldfish Memory

 * [Adam and Jamie buy goldfish and supplies for the test from Steve, a pet shop owner.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's the easiest sale Steve's ever made: two tanks, ten fish, and enough supplies to feed a whale.


 * [The beginning of the competetion, to Adam.]
 * Jamie: I'm gonna kick your goldfish ass.


 * (Jamie's goldfish has just finished the maze in twenty-five seconds.)
 * Adam: Mine are eating their own poo.


 * (Adam taps on Jamie's goldfish tank and says: "Goodnight fish")
 * Jamie, talking to the camera: You see, this is what has basically screwed him up, like, "Goodnight fish" (Imitating Adam), Yea, that helps!
 * Adam: We have to identify the smart ones.

Trombone Explosion

 * Jamie: Hi, we're here to buy a trombone.
 * Clerk: Sure, for a student?
 * Adam: Well no, actually we want to blow it up.
 * Clerk: You want to blow it up? [pauses] We have some used ones.

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 * [Pyrotechnician Jack Morocco is loading an explosive-filled mute into a trombone.]
 * Jack: So how much is in there?
 * Jamie: It goes all the way to the tip. That's six rocket engines.
 * Jack: Got a regular Panzerfaust here.

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 * Jack: Boy, I sure hope we don't fly beyond our limits here.

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 * Jack: Just another day of blowin' somethin' up.

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 * [Adam blows the demolished trombone.]
 * Adam: Hey, it still makes noise!

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 * Adam: [trying to make Buster stand in front of the trombone] It's like trying to make a dead man stand.
 * Rufus Hound (U.K. Narrator): Better not ask why Adam knows that.

Break Step Bridge

 * [During the initial test, where Jamie's soldiers aren't getting enough air power]
 * Adam: Jamie's made a doo-wop group, not a battalion of soldiers. Looks like the California Raisins.

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 * Adam: [Referring to Jamie's soldiers] They're cute...cute for SCIENCE.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Ah, the old Mythbusters motto: when in doubt, add something heavy.

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 * [Adam tips the bridge over, destroying it.]
 * Jamie: Feel better now?
 * Adam: I do feel better.
 * Jamie: Good for you.

Toothbrush Surprise

 * Jamie: There's poo everywhere!

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 * [Adam talking with a toothbrush in his mouth.]
 * Adam: We're using the ones that were on top of the toilet.

The Hunt for Hoffa

 * [Adam is digging a hole in front of the workshop to bury pigs for a test.]
 * Jamie: Adam doesn't know it yet, but he's digging his own grave.
 * Adam: What's that?
 * Jamie: What? Nothing.

Jet Taxi

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Who'da thought? Cheap car, dud battery.
 * Jamie: It seems like you have to take the car tire off in order to change the battery. What is the point? Probably because someone built the damn thing in a computer and doesn't have any sense. Piece of crap.
 * Rob Lee: While Jamie curses all things modern...

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 * [Jamie rigs the taxi to be operated remotely.]
 * Adam: I think Jamie and I should drive around and pick people up.
 * Jamie: Yeah, with nobody in the front seat.

Myths Revisited

 * [Jamie is wearing a thermal suit while they're testing a myth on exploding aerosols. He hasn't spoken since he put on the suit.]
 * Adam: You wanna take your hood off and participate in this conversation?
 * Jamie: I kinda like it in here. It's private.

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 * [Jamie is deciding whether he is going to pee on the fence]
 * Adam: All those years spent as a political prisoner in South America and they never ONCE attached a battery to your nuts.
 * Jamie: Well why do you think I don't want to do it.

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 * [Playing with Buster's face]
 * Adam: You guys have f***ed with me long enough. It's payback time and payback's a b****.
 * (Adam's ****** is censored with rifle gunshot sounds, and Grant is heard laughing in the background)

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 * [Talking to Tory after taking off Buster's face that he had on]
 * Adam: You know what's funny is that when you put this on you can smell, and you get all these scents and memories of blowing him up, dropping him off a cliff, a little salt water, a little rotting pig.... It's like a... It's like a trip down memory lane. You wanna try?
 * Tory: No thanks.

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 * Adam: Not only do we get to short out a battery, but we get to do it in a gasoline-rich environment! I can't think of a better way to spend a Monday afternoon.

What Is Bulletproof?

 * Adam: [referring to the safety glass the team uses] You told us all it was bulletproof, and, it's not!

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 * Jamie: [Adam, after several tries, has finally hit the target] Good shot, Adam.
 * Adam: [little-boy voice] Thank you, Uncle Jamie.

Skunked!

 * [Adam and Jamie release a skunk into the women's room in an attempt to incite it to spray them.]
 * Christine: Thanks for putting it in the women's bathroom.

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 * [Adam is pouring beer onto the floor to try and get rid of skunk smell]
 * Jamie: What...you're doing it all wrong! It's spilling everywhere.  You gotta start at the top and move down.
 * Adam: It's hard being Jamie sometimes.

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 * Adam: Finally! We smell foul!

Ancient Death Ray

 * Adam: I can't help but notice that IT'S NOT ON FIRE YET!

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 * Jamie: Our death ray doesn't seem to be working right. I'm standing right in it, and I'm not dead yet.

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 * [After Busting the myth, Adam has the "death ray" flop to the concrete face-first, breaking every mirror in the array.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): And that's about 2,000 years bad luck right there.

Levitation Machine

 * Adam: This is the show. It's like four minutes of science and then ten minutes of me hurting myself.

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 * Adam: COME OOOOON!!!!!!

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 * Rob Lee (U.S. Narrator): It's a very un-MythBusters-like moment. They've built an invention, and nothing has gone wrong... [Adam loses his balance and falls onto his back from a standing position as the machine is turned off.] Ah. That's more like it.

Elevator of Death

 * [Jamie and Kari are scouting a derelict hotel as a location.]
 * Kari: Since we're here anyway, can we film a horror movie?

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 * (Jamie, Kari and Scottie are testing the jump mechanism, Buster falls on his face)
 * Scottie: Faceplant!

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 * [Jamie and Kari are measuring the height of the elevator shaft.]
 * Jamie: 92 feet, to the top of the pulleys.
 * Kari: Uh, 92 feet to the dead bird.
 * [Jamie laughs]

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 * [The crew cleans debris from the elevator car.]
 * Scottie: [Holds up a dead bird.] Two words — Naaas-tee. Ugh...

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Elevators are designed not to fall. Fortunately, the MythBusters wrote the book on disabling safety features.

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 * [Adam is disabling the elevator's safety brake for the experiment.]
 * Adam: Anticlimactically enough, I believe I've disabled the entire mechanism by removing this simple pin.

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 * [After Buster falls down the elevator.]
 * Adam: I believe this is more damage than we've ever done to Buster in one myth before.

Beat the Radar Detector

 * Scottie: We'll never get pulled over for going six miles an hour!

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 * Rob Lee: A few of the guys from CHPs [California Highway Patrol] are on-hand to oversee the experiment. If anything does beat the radar, they wanna know about it.

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 * [Kari just fired off the fire-extinguisher chaff gun.]
 * Tory: [to police officer] Which is gonna be more expensive: the speeding ticket or the littering ticket?
 * CHP Officer: [laughs] The littering ticket.

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 * Tory: The only thing that gave us any result, but just barely, was my favorite—And I think you'll like this one, Adam...the Radar Wheel of Death! [The Build Team plonks it in front of Adam.]
 * Adam: [laughs] Oh my god!

Plywood Builder

 * [Adam makes a miscalculation judging the necessary weight for a ten-inch-tall miniature Buster doll.]
 * Adam: 10 inches tall…25 pounds. I just did the math. I need him to weigh 25 pounds.
 * Jamie: So you're saying that he needs to be built out of depleted uranium.
 * Adam: [Laughs.] Do you have some? Is it under "D" or "U" over here?

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Adam removes 5 plywood sheets from the 12 available.
 * [Adam breaks a sheet of wood veneer.]
 * Adam: Screw.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Uhh - make that 11.
 * Adam: One tore, bringing it out...trying to get it out of the way of Jay the cameraman!

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 * [Buster is dropped 60 feet to the ground. He lands with a solid thud.]
 * Christine: [laughs] I was laying on the ground when he hit, and I felt the ground move a little bit.
 * Adam: I never get tired of doing that.

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 * Christine: He's gonna die... but it's gonna look great.

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 * [Adam's Plywood Parachute is about to be tested.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): These rigs represent three days of skill, passion, and effort. Pity, really.
 * [The parachute fails miserably.]
 * Adam: Well, a fat lot of good that did.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): And that's why they don't make parachutes out of wood.
 * Adam: [to Jamie] I'm taking solace in the fact that your wing is going to fail so utterly spectacularly.
 * Jamie: You're probably right. But then you never know.
 * Adam: [nods] But then you never know.

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 * [Jamie's design falls to the ground, hitting the surface on its side and snapping into pieces. Buster thuds to the ground loudly as Adam begins laughing hysterically.]
 * Adam: [laughs] Whoooo!!!
 * Christine: Do you feel better now?
 * Adam: I do, I feel a lot better.

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 * [a trailer just before a commercial]
 * Rob Lee: Next, In his quest to build the ultimate plywood parachute, Adam Savage...screws up.
 * Adam: [after ruining a part of plywood] Oh, *beep*!

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 * [Adam flying over Jamie on a zip-line.]
 * Adam: AAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOO! I fart on you!

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 * Jamie: We're trying to up the bar on this stupid stuff we're doing.

Bathtub Electrocution

 * [Christine is hauling in a toilet to use in their bathroom set.]
 * Christine: Rented it for $10... and it's dripping on me! God knows what's in this water.

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 * [Adam is working on creating a full-size dummy out of ballistics gel.]
 * Adam: Let's get on our knees and pray. I don't know to whom. Is there a patron saint of ballistics gel?

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 * Adam: Next up, we have the iron, or as we like to call it, "Fierro de los Muertos!"

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 * Adam: If Jamie doesn't believe it'll work, then I have no trouble dropping the toaster in the bathtub when he's sitting in it. But something tells me he won't.

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 * [The MythBusters have just dropped a hair dryer with a ground fault interruptor (GFI) switch into the bathtub. The GFI switch has failed to trip.]
 * Adam: What kind of ground fault interruption is this? It's pumping water!  I would say that's bad!

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 * [Electricians are assessing why the test bathroom has electrical problems.]
 * Rob Lee: Turns out there are two faults in the system: Adam and Jamie.

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 * [Adam drops a toaster into the test tub. The flash pot goes off, indicating a fatal shock.]
 * Adam: Whoa...
 * Rob Lee: Our friend here is...toast.
 * Adam: Oh yeah: 12 milliamps. Toasters—no good.

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 * [After Adam drops the toaster into the bathtub and picks up the curling iron.]
 * Adam: Now it's time for one of my personal favorites, [imitating Pee Wee Herman and making the curling iron look like it's talking] the curling iron! Let's go!
 * Jamie: What are you? Pee Wee Herman?

Killer Quicksand

 * Adam: Killer quicksand. Is that why I'm standing here in this stupid pith helmet?
 * Jamie: No, you're standing there in that stupid pith helmet because you're an idiot.

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 * Jamie: Adam needs a cookie.

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 * Jamie: [pushing Adam into the quicksand] Drown, you bastard!

Exploding Jawbreaker

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): [After a microwaved jawbreaker was put in the metal teeth which caused it to explode, injuring Christine] So, the MythBusters have conclusively proved that jawbreaker plus microwave plus steel teeth equals scalded MythTern.

Static Cannon

 * Adam: STOP SPARKING MY [censored]!

Pingpong Rescue

 * Adam: In Monterey Bay, Ping-Pong ball plus sea otter equals jail time for at least some member of the crew, I think we'll have to draw straws to figure out who.

Boom-Lift Catapult

 * [Tory tries a second test of the boom-lift.]
 * Tory: All right, I'm gonna count down...49, 48... just kidding. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...
 * [The test fails.]
 * Tory: Aaand Buster didn't even spill his coffee.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Doing things "the MythBusters way" usually spells trouble... on a titanic scale.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's audacious. It's ludicrous. It's... MythBusters.

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 * Adam: I think it's about a 10% chance of the whole thing falling down, about a 40% chance of Buster actually flying any distance, and the other 50% is Buster going "FOOM!" right in front of the thing.

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 * Tory: [commenting on the amount of destruction] Hey Adam, would you say it's safe to say that there won't be a second shot?

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 * Kari: Myth totally failed. Completely busted. Totally, completely busted.
 * Scottie: And Buster: busted. And boomlift: busted.
 * Jamie: And everything's busted.
 * Adam: Ground:
 * Scottie: busted.

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 * Jamie: MythBusters.
 * Adam: Breaking big things for science, every day.
 * [One of the crew members' phone rings; cast and crew crack up]

Needle in a Haystack

 * Jamie: NASA can put a man on the moon.
 * Adam: But can the MythBusters find a needle in a haystack?

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 * Jamie: That means the first stop is a hay store.
 * Adam: Uh, otherwise known as a farm.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Ah, the hay store.

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 * Adam: Its funny, because if you asked me to pick out what you would think of as your traditional, y'know, "movie-type" hay, I would point to the straw.
 * Jamie: Traditional "movie hay?"
 * Adam: Yeah, y'know, like the people are always getting stuck in a hay bale or rolling in the hay, or whatever they do in the movies? Thats what I would think of as hay.
 * Jamie: Having a roll in the hay with your girlfriend?
 * Adam: Yeah... don't get all red-faced.

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 * Kari: Do you see his [Jamie's] machine working? It's like Dante's Inferno over there!

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 * Adam: I can see the cut now, "Hey! We'll be drinking mimosas in an hour or two."...
 * Adam: [in a flashback clip] We'll be, like, sipping mimosas on the beach...
 * Adam: ...Cut to, "6 hours later, Adam's team is still going at it."
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): 6 hours later, Adam's team is still going at it.
 * Adam: "They've found two needles..."
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): They've found two needles...
 * Adam: "But still have the smallest needle and the bone needle to go."
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): But still have the smallest needle and the bone needle to go.

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 * Adam: This is adding some magnets to the front end of our feed trough. These are super strong neodymium magnets. And see if we can't pick the needle out at the very beginning.
 * Scottie: You just had your finger on it!
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Good idea. Jamie thought of it ages ago.

Exploding House

 * Adam: All right, so I think my faulty wiring of the faulty wiring is no longer faulty, so that it's correctly faulty.

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 * Jamie: Yet again we're blowing things up in front of my shop. And not only that but there are noxious chemicals involved which will probably leave a residue over the whole block and, um... I guess it's okay. I'm getting used to it. So are the neighbors.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Time to take stock. Model house — check. Potentially explosive bug bomb — check. Various open flames and electrical sparks — check. What could possibly go wrong?

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 * Adam: Big boom, big boom, big boom!

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 * Adam: Here on MythBusters Makeover, we're turning this lovely California bungalow into a disaster zone.

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 * [After they succeed in blowing up the gas from the bug bombs.]
 * Adam: That's what I wanted to hear!

Talking to Plants

 * Jamie: Putting all of these greenhouses up on the roof, I think I'm gonna get checked out by the police for growing pot or something up here, y'know. It's like "What are you doing?" It looks kinda suspicious.

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 * Tory: Do you have hardcore, to-the-bone death metal?
 * Music Store Clerk: Do we ever!

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 * Kari: I just think the talking plants are committing suicide because they're listening to [in a very high-pitched voice] "I loveyouloveyouloveyou" all freaking day!

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 * Kari: [From the recording] If you were in college, you'd be a freshman!
 * Adam: You called the plant a freshman?
 * Kari: [embarrassed] I... I was running out of material!!!

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 * [Scottie and Kari are recording various lines for their 'nice' and 'nasty' houses]
 * Scottie: [to a pea plant] I hope your roots rot in hell. The only thing you're good for is giving people gas.
 * Kari: [yelling to another pea plant] YOU SUCK FRESHMAN [censored]! [to a crew member (normal voice)] How's that?
 * Scottie: Beautiful round green peas...
 * Kari: You nasty little awful green pea that's ruined every single burrito I've ever had.

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 * Kari: [Talking while mimicing a mitten puppet.] The plants are doing very well today, Tory!
 * Scottie: [In the same puppet voice.] Hi Tory, what plants do you think are doin' better?
 * Tory: Hey, you guys... [Leading them to the door in a concerned way]
 * Scottie: Well I think the heavy metal plants are better! Because there's so much anger in this world it really helps to listen to that kinda stuff so we can get it all out.
 * Tory: Its okay, shhhh.
 * Scottie: [Answering herself] Oh! I can see what you mean! That classical music really kinda makes the hairs on my neck stand up!
 * Tory: Lets get out of the sun.

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 * Kari: Dumbass peas.

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 * Adam: Me and Tory are going to try one of the Death Metal peas.

Ming Dynasty Astronaut

 * [On experimenting with different mixtures of gunpowder.]
 * Adam: In this line of questioning, the only way to know without... being educated is to just keep on trying different formulations. And at a certain point we have to stop and just, you know, blow [censored] up.

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 * [Adam has failed at several attempts to create effective rockets.]
 * Adam: I think we need to get some professional help... and then I think we need some rocket experts.

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 * [Adam joins Jamie as he's making new rocket fuel.]
 * Adam: You makin' pudding?

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 * Adam: 80 pounds of gunpowder, 22 idiots, 1 crash-test dummy... priceless.

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 * [Just after the first rocket chair launch.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Just like Xuan Hu, Buster's vanished, but he's no astronaut. In fact...he's toast.

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 * Adam: His a** is on fire!

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 * Adam: And here I thought the Elevator of Death was the most damage he's ever withstood. He is burnt to a crisp!

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 * Adam: [in a Chinese accent] I going to teach you a lesson.

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 * Adam: I'm staring at a Chinese-dressed crash test dummy on a throne strapped to 70 pounds of gunpowder. [laughs] I just had another one of those Mythbuster moments.

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 * Adam: Buster was taken to another world in a puff of smoke.

Free Energy

 * Jamie: Kind of makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, don't it?
 * Adam: If you mean it makes me feel like I feel about the Easter Bunny or Santa Claus, yeah, that kind of warm and fuzzy, cause it's a FANTASY!

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 * Jamie: I'm not sure what it's gonna do, but it looks cool.

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 * Adam: Nonetheless, we were able to do it with a reasonable number of tests, and I'd say it's busted, busted, busted! and I don't wanna get any e-mails about it!

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 * [Adam recoils as an electrical device shorts out.]
 * Adam: That might have been, I dunno, a bad noise. I'm releasing the mysterious blue smoke here.  The problem is once you release the mysterious blue smoke, electronics don't work anymore.

Killer Ceiling Fan

 * [The MythBusters are about to subject a ballistics gel bust of Adam to a custom-made razor-sharp ceiling fan.]
 * Adam: As long as you're going to do it with me, let's make sure everyone knows who it is.
 * [Adam then puts his glasses onto the bust.]
 * Adam: You'll have to tell me how it turns out 'cause I can't see a damned thing.
 * Kari: [Points to the bust.] Judging by the Coke bottles on this thing, he can't see a thing either

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 * Kari: It's like a little tornado down here!

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 * Adam: Absolutely, and so probably some human cranium, we've done this before when we did Penny Drop..
 * Scottie: Human cranium? We have human cranium?
 * Adam: I have the human cranium in storage, yep.
 * Scottie: You would!
 * Adam: We have one of everything here at MythBusters.

Cement Removal

 * [After detonating a cherry bomb in a cement truck.]
 * Adam: It sounded like we just planted a midget with a paper bag.

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 * [The team have just destroyed a cement truck with over 800 pounds of ANFO.]
 * Adam: Jamie, I swear I left it right here!

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 * Jamie: This has got nothing to do with the myth; it's just a big boom.

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 * Jamie: Talk about removing concrete; there is no concrete; there is no truck; there's no nothing.

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 * Kari: Failure is always an option on Mythbusters.

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 * [Adam holds up what appears to be one of the cement truck's engine parts.]
 * Adam: Well, there's your problem!

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 * Adam: It's all gone, man that's it... (Laughing) Mythbusters 1... Cement Truck,0

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 * Adam: OK, everybody say it with me... Jamie wants big boom.

Salsa Escape

 * Christine: Don't shoot me with that pellet gun.
 * Adam: I'm not gonna shoot anyone with the pellet gun...[imitating southern accent] Not unless I have to!

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 * Jamie: Did I ever tell you that I worked as a concrete inspector for several months up in Seattle?
 * Adam: Was this before or after you were the big animal veterinarian for the circus?
 * Jamie: No, I never did that. You must be mistaken.

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 * Jamie: Think, then act. Don't act, then think.

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 * Christine: [Looking at level on top of homemade concrete prison] Oh my God, it's level! [level falls over] awwwww...

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 * Jamie: Time for us to pit our skills against each other.
 * Adam: You have an unfair advantage because you've broken out of a Mexican prison before.

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 * [Adam notices that Jamie is using a radio part on his salsa.]
 * Adam: What is that?
 * Jamie: This is a radio.
 * Adam: How'd you get a bloody radio?
 * Jamie: I was good.

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 * [After spending hours trying to dissolve the window bar]
 * Adam: If anything, my bar is bigger! I'm increasing the mass of the bar!!

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 * [Jamie watches Adam burning salsa.]
 * Jamie: He's practicing for his experience with the electric chair.
 * [Adam burns his hand with salsa.]
 * Adam: Ow! [cries in pain] ow, hot, burning, salsa napalm!

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 * [Jamie watches Adam scrape burnt salsa off his bars.]
 * Adam: God, this stuff smells rank.
 * Jamie: It looks kinda like... poo.

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 * [Adam handles a silk shirt soaked in urine.]
 * Adam: You know, I don't think Jackie Chan used real wee for this. God, this stuff smells rank. Eew, it's warm! I didn't want it to be warm! There's wee everywhere!

Driveshaft Pole Vault

 * Jamie: It's our mission to destroy the car, no matter what.

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 * Jamie: This is pure dumb luck, if it works, that's why I wanted Adam on it.

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 * Kari: [to Adam] Anytime you show up I'm scared.

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 * Kari: [to Adam] Your way of working is one of the great mysteries of our time.

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 * Kari: This is MythBusters - of course I'm expecting problems.

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 * Scottie: [to Kari, about Tory] Let's egg him on until he hurts himself. That's always fun.
 * [She and Kari encourage him to jump over a wagon on his bicycle; he tries, but fails spectacularly.]
 * Scottie: [to Tory, laughing] Why do I always laugh when you get hurt?

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 * [Scottie removes the driveshaft from the car and presents it to Jamie.]
 * Scottie: For you—one nice, greasy part: guaranteed to get your shirt dirty.

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 * Scottie: [sniffs] Smell that?
 * Kari: What's that?
 * Scottie: Baaad things.

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 * Adam: MythBusters took another car out of its misery.

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 * Kari: I have to say the jackhammer makes you look really tough, the little red wagon...
 * Tory, Adam and Jamie in unison: Not so much

Exploding Port-a-Potty

 * Scottie: Maybe it's a myth that methane is flammable.
 * Adam: It's not a myth; we're just idiots.

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 * Kari: I guess we don't have a Plan B because we kinda expected Plan A to go off without a hitch.
 * Adam: You should never, ever, ever expect Plan A to go off without a hitch. Usually, Jamie and I, it's Plan D.

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 * Adam: This is the point of in day, which we come to many times, when we start to go, "What else do we have that's flammable in the truck?"

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 * Tory:(mimicking Adam; puts ear up to the hose) "I hear it!"

Real Car vs. Toy Car

 * Kari: [Holding toy car.] I got my first kiss over one of these. Then he punched me.

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 * Adam: It's the newest kid thing. It's Brick Car! It's faster than anything and uglier than anything, too.
 * Jamie: And if you throw it at your brother really hard, it'll kill him!

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 * Adam: Shall we race?
 * Jamie: Yeah, whatever.
 * Adam: 'Cause whoever wins this race is BETTER!

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 * Adam: It looks like it was built for one thing: it was built for super speed!
 * Jamie: I think it looks like it was built for killing children. ...And what's all that crap on the back of it?
 * Adam: That's the rocket engine, man! That's the solid... rocket... fuel... boos...ter...thing!

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 * Adam: Please note the Hyneman doing his careful straightening work. Jamie's people have been track-straighteners since the Middle Ages.

Buttered Toast
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 * Kari: Y'know, my toast, my toast ALWAYS lands butter side up!

Ancient Battery

 * Tory: I'm building the Ark of the Covenant. Well, a replica.

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 * [Just after Tory tests the electric fence through their contraption.]
 * Kari: On a scale of 1 to 10, what was the electrocution pain on that one?
 * Tory: Uh, I would say 211.

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 * [Just after Scottie is shocked.]
 * Scottie: Ho-leee!!!! I feel like I just got punched in the chest!

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): What he [Adam] doesn't know is they might have replaced the ancient batteries with an electric fence transformer...which would be the dirtiest trick in MythBusting history.

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 * [Kari and Tory have hooked an electric fence generator into something Adam's going to be touching without his knowledge.]
 * Adam: Now, you guys haven't hooked in the electric fence thing in here, have you?
 * Kari, Tory, and Scottie: Hahahahaha, no!

<hr width="50%"/> (Adam touches the battery, receives a shock)
 * Adam:: OW! *bleep bleep*

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 * [Just after Adam is shocked.]
 * Kari: Did you feel God?

Cooling a Six-Pack

 * Adam: Science, plus beer, equals good!

Son of a Gun

 * [A civil war recreationalist has just shot a bullet straight into a small cloth pouch over 50 feet away.]
 * Adam: Bloody hell, I think he did it…

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): And in the pouch, well, let's just say a sample of genetic legacy has been obtained and dyed blue for easier visibility.
 * Jamie: Genetic legacy? IT'S SPERM! Any kid in grade school knows that! Helps make babies, you know?

On the Phone in a Thunderstorm

 * [Adam is on his knees behaving like a stereotypical mad scientist's hunchbacked assistant - and speaking like it]
 * Adam: What are your plans, my master?
 * Jamie: We are going to take over the world.
 * Adam: Ohhh, yeeesss.

Breaking Glass

 * (Introducing the first attempt at breaking glass while Dr. Roger Schwenke of Meyer Sound paces, seemingly looking for something)
 * Adam: So, this is "MythBusters" wine glass breaking test number one, simply playing a tone through the speaker to the glass. That's it.
 * Dr. Roger Schwenke: I'm really sorry. I need to actually plug that speaker into something.
 * Adam: Oh, details, details.

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 * Adam: The best-case scenario is that the glass shatters in my face! How do you think that makes me feel?

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 * Jamie: Jaime, what am I doing wrong?
 * Jaime Vendera: You have got to shave your moustache!

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 * (While Tory is constructing a Jet engine with vacuum parts):
 * Tory: Yeah...there's probably a bunch of engineers looking at me and going "What the hell is he doing here?!" And, ah...I've been asking myself that as well on a moment-by-moment basis...

Jet Pack

 * Adam: I love aluminum... aluminum, I love you [smooches aluminium part].

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 * Jamie: We're either gonna die, or we're gonna fly.

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 * Adam: The problem with making two, is that once you've done one...you're only halfway there!

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 * Adam: Damn this is a sexy machine!

Pyramid Power

 * Adam: Can we not do any more of these "oogie-boogie" myths, please?

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 * [After Tory has returned from shaving with numerous cuts on his face]
 * Tory: [to Kari] Baby give us a kiss. You don't find me hot, like this?
 * Kari: You look like hell!

Killer Brace Position

 * Kari: I promised my mom I wouldn't do anything dumb and unsafe again.
 * Tory: Looks like you didn't keep your promise.
 * later, after the test:
 * Kari: I just want to say I'm sorry, Mom and Dad.

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 * [Kari dresses a dummy with a bra]
 * Jamie: Did she come with a bra?
 * Kari: We want it to be decent, this is a family show.
 * Jamie: Where did you get the bra? Did you give her yours?
 * Kari: No!

Cell Phones vs. Drunk Driving

 * Kari: Once again, I'm going to humiliate myself in front of a very large audience.

360° Swing

 * Tory: [After breaking a swing set and falling to the ground.] I'm so glad we had the mats!

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 * Kari: Busted, but the rockets were spectacular.
 * Adam: Well, hopefully, that's our job... to strap rockets onto everything!

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 * Jamie: Sounds like a good way to break your neck.

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 * Jamie: Yet another everyday household item turned deadly.

Bulletproof Water

 * Adam: Well, that ought to silence most of our detractors on this one... but I expect we'll still get some complaints.
 * Jamie: Yeah, like you didn't use a cannon, or something...

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Jamie's picked up enough ammunition to start a military coup.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): They have more guns here than in a Tarantino movie.

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 * [Adam and Jamie are comparing the sizes of the .30-06 and .50 caliber bullets.]
 * Adam: (points to the .30-06 bullet) This kills you (points to the .50 bullet) this kills you and everyone else in the room.

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 * [Jamie prepares to fire the monster .50BMG into the pool.]
 * Adam: We should all get ready to break down and pack up... hopefully we'll be out of here before the pool completely drains!

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 * Jamie: The worst case scenario today is someone dies from a bullet wound.

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 * [Jamie is looking at a .50BMG round.]
 * Jamie: It's smaller than my head... it's all right.

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 * [After Jamie fires a shotgun into a water tank, breaks the tank with the shot, and almost creates an electrocution risk in the workshop.]
 * Jamie: Well, it looks like we're not gonna be shooting any more guns off in the shop.

Border Slingshot

 * Adam: Ah, the hazards of giant slingshot-making...

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 * Adam: Shockingly [holds up an improvised sling they had just used] That didn't work! I-I can't imagine why...

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 * Adam: [holding up a bowling ball] Now this may look like one of the lost Seeing Stones from The Lord of the Rings, but it's actually an eight-pound bowling ball. What we're going to do is head out to some unsuspecting football field, rig up our unreasonably large slingshot to the goal posts, and probably embed this bowling ball somewhere in the next town.

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 * [looking up at the completed border slingshot]
 * Adam: I think what we've got here is a thing.
 * Jamie: Looks like a big-a** slingshot to me.

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 * Jamie: This is gonna kill you!

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 * Jamie: Unfortunately, humans are big heavy things.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): The Boom-Lift Catapult tossed him a respectable 90 feet... if you include the 60 feet of boom. In Raccoon Rocket, 10 lbs. of black powder blasted him 80 feet. And in the myth of the Ming Dynasty Astronaut... well, he just got burnt to a cinder. Come to think of it, Buster could do with a launch break.

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 * [Adam picks up the arm of Simulaide Suzy, broken off when hitting the tarmac]
 * Adam: Here, let me give you a hand.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): And while Jamie is hard at work rigging up the rig, Adam is busy fulfilling the "fooling-around" clause in his contract.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): The kid's a goner - but how's the slingshot?

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 * [After Jamie tosses Simulaide Suzy into the slingshot yoke.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): When it comes to handling children, Jamie's old school.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): With an array of test-firings planned, Adam paints the projectile to guard against lead poisoning. Because - that's bad.

Killer Tissue Box

 * [The team has tested the effect of a 45 MPH crash with an unsecured hatchet in the back of a car.]
 * Adam: This is your head. [thumps box of ballistic gel with axe through it] This is your head with an axe in it! Are we clear?

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 * Jamie: I'm sure that there is a speed where a bobble-head could be lethal, but I don't think 45 mph is that speed.

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 * Adam: So clearly the second spike was Buster twisting to get out of the way of the deadly tissue box!

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 * Adam: That the tissue box is the only thing in the car that's completely undamaged might just prove the myth!

Hair Cream Decapitation

 * Grant: Well, I like danger.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): With the hard work done... Adam arrives.

Escape Slide Parachute

 * Adam: We're not leaving here without Buster, man. Leave no crash-test dummy behind!

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 * [Shortly after Buster hits the ground from 400 feet.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Small crash-test dummies, friends and family of Buster may find the following pictures disturbing.
 * Adam: [seeing Buster's remains] Oh no! Oh, my God! Oh, crime-iny!
 * Rob Lee: "Criminy"? So shocked he makes up a new word.
 * Adam: I think I'm calling the local fire department and seeing if they have any Simulaids.

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 * [The escape slide is about to hit the ground at a survivable speed after being dropped from 2,000 feet and lands.]
 * Adam: [running to the landed escape slide] Wowwwww!

MythBusters Revisited

 * [Kari, Tory, and Grant are borrowing Adam and Jamie's jet pack to retest a myth.]
 * Kari: If there is one scratch, one out of place bolt on this jet pack, Jamie and Adam will lock us in a closet for the rest of the season.

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 * [Jamie has just suggested getting an RPG to blow up a car.]
 * Adam: That's the next revisit; someone's gonna write in and say, "you guys should have used an RPG, 'cause that would definitely have blown up the car!" and then we'll go get one of those, and then we'll blow up the car, and then there will be some other problem.
 * Jamie: And we're fine with that!

The Five Second Rule

 * Adam: I love having bacteriological... test stuff!

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Adam's as happy as a kid with a new chemistry set. Come to think of it, Adam is a kid with a new chemistry set.

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 * Jamie: It's a shop... whaddya want?
 * Adam: I wanna be able to eat off the damn floor.

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 * [Adam drops and then picks up a sandwich.]
 * Adam: Whoops! I picked it up within 3 seconds... would you eat it?
 * Jamie: I wouldn't eat it just because you handled it.

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 * Adam: So, no french-kissing dogs I think is our conclusion here.
 * Jamie: I would be more inclined to say, no french-kissing Adam!
 * Adam: I don't eat my own poo!

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 * [Adam is playing with aluminum pans]
 * Adam: For some reason...I have the desire to smash them on my head.

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 * [Jamie has explained their use of 'beef broth' to simulate a dirty floor, but stumbled over the words.]
 * Adam: Bleef bloth? Wlhat bleef bloth? Thlis bleef bloth?

Chinese Invasion Alarm

 * Tory: So, Jamie? If we, uh, find gold, are you gonna share it with me?

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 * [Grant and Kari are making a drum.]
 * Kari: Y'know my people come from a long line of goat shavers, so I feel it's in my blood.

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 * Grant: Apologies to everyone who actually makes their own drums... we have no idea what we're doing.

Confederate Rocket

 * Rob Lee: While the Boxer makes progress, the Hale is out for the count—because Jamie's made an error of schoolboy proportions, and, to avoid public humiliation...
 * Jamie: You know, if I don't talk, you don't get any good TV.
 * Rob Lee: ...he's run away from the cameraman.
 * Adam [of Jamie's welding slip-up]: What happened?
 * Jamie: ...Nothing.
 * Rob Lee: 'De Nile (denial) is a river in Africa.
 * Adam: C'mon, what happened? Did you accidentally weld the thing at the end of your pipe that was supposed to be a screw fitting?
 * Rob Lee: Overzealous welding has sealed his rocket shut - and he's not happy.
 * Jamie: [censored]

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 * Adam: I've got a Boxer rocket, and I'm gonna fire it!

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 * Jamie: I don't know, but I think that's one of the rockets, and, judging by the size of the hole, I - I think it's mine.
 * [He gestures toward a large hole in the dirt.]
 * Jamie: I don't know, I'll see if I can feel the end of it…
 * [He reaches a full arm's length in the hole.]
 * Jamie: [giggling] I'm still not touching anything!
 * Crew member: Uh-oh, backhoe time!

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 * Adam: This is where the danger zone happens. When nothing happens for a while, everyone's like "well, let's get closer... let's get closer... let's get closer..." and BOOM! everyone's dead.

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 * [Adam and Jamie have just test-fired a rocket inside the workshop. The most obvious result is a lot of smoke.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): We clearly have ignition... but what the hell's going on in there?
 * [Inside, there is lots of smoke and several small fires.]
 * Rob Lee: Not so much "fire in the hole" as fire in the whole shop!

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 * Adam: Hey, that WORKED!!

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 * [Kari mixes two ingredients to gun cotton, with the ingredients replaced by a donkey bray and a rooster cackle respectively (to conceal just what those ingredients are)].
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): So when you add "donkey" to "rooster", you got a violent reaction.

Compact Compact

 * Kari: A lot of things would have to go right for that plan to work...

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 * [Following a near-disaster with a semi]
 * Adam: What was your plan for stopping these things?
 * Tory: Well, there wasn't really a plan...

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): We've got ourselves a runaway (semi). Uhhh... Run away!

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 * Adam: I'm a little sad because it didn't go exactly as planned. We may have to revisit this one - but WOW!!! (They did revisit it several seasons later)

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 * Kari: Did you actually think we were going to confirm this one?

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 * Adam: This myth, much like the two trucks, and the car, is totally busted.
 * Jamie: Boy, is it busted!

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 * Jamie: Let me see that pulley there...
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): The biggest crash in MythBusters history, and he wants to see the pulley??

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 * Adam: Some nice toggles! I'm saving those!
 * Grant: Dude, you're salvaging in the middle of a rescue operation?!
 * Adam: Why else do you think I got into this line of work?

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 * [The tow rope has snapped, and a semi truck is now off course and out of control]
 * Tory: How do we stop this thing?
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): That's a very good question... with no answer.

<hr width="50%"/>
 * Adam: [commenting on their first test] I hope you enjoyed that little sequence of failure.

Vodka Myths

 * [After Grant smells Adam's feet]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's not foot odor, it's foot "oh, dear!"

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 * Adam: There is no dignity in television.

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 * Kari: And this is the 'plastic bottle brand' vodka... [whispering] always the finest for MythBusters!

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 * [Adam is eating crackers with limburger cheese on them.]
 * Kari: You know, my eyes are watering being in the vincinity of these three items. I think I need an official umm... Tester. So while you continue chewing. [Adam nods] Grant Imahara, I need your nose!
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Dead man walking...

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 * [Kari is washing Adam's feet with Vodka.]
 * Grant: Would this be considered a perk of your Mythbusters experience?
 * Kari: Are you talking to me or him?

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 * Adam: I have to say, I think there are going to be a lot of jealous fans out there that I'm getting my feet washed by you, Kari.
 * Grant: Now you know you've made it.

Bottle Rocket Jet Pack

 * Tory: See? Science IS fun.

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 * [Kari is suspended from a engine hoist to test the strength of the harness she is wearing.]
 * Tory: What...the...hell are you guys doing?
 * Kari: (giggling) I'm a piñata!

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 * Tory: Kari's too nervous, no more jokin'. Let's grim up.

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 * Grant: I'm pumping as fast as I can!

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 * [A water cooler bottle rocket carrying a 2kg weight launches surprisingly high into the air.]
 * Grant: Holy crap... run!

Steel Toe Amputation

 * Adam: I don't know about you, but that looks like some pretty crushed toes to me.

Seasickness-Kill or Cure

 * Adam: (on Jamie) He will ride in that chair, he will swallow his vomit...

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 * Kari: (when Jamie won't yield to seasickness) He's just a little too amused with this; it's starting to piss me off.

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 * Tory: (in the seasick chair) This is fun! I could do this all day!

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 * Adam: (on the wrist-strap seasickness cure) It may work for Barry Manilow, but it don't work for crap for me.

Paper Crossbow

 * [Adam is testing the holding strength of wood glue.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): It's been a while since Adam hurt himself on the show - but this setup has potential.
 * [Adam's test rig then separates and hits his fingers.]
 * Rob Lee: Yup - business as usual. 60 pounds of force across the knuckles is going to sting a little.

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 * [Adam is seeing Jamie's version of the crossbow for the first time.]
 * Adam: Dude, if the full draw of the bow makes it collapse, is candy gonna pour out?
 * Jamie: Adam's, you could use as a club and it'd probably be just fine; you could still shoot it.

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 * Jamie: I've always had a fascination with crossbows. I've had this one since I was a teenager. That's why there are no cats left in the neighborhood.
 * Adam: I can imagine the scene... [mimicking Jamie] Why... why, thank you, father...

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 * Adam: [giggling] I shot Grant in the face!

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 * Adam: [giggling] I got him right in his left nostril! Oh dude! that is so going right in his nose!

More Vodka Myths

 * Tory: [Commenting on the LED display of a clothes dryer.] It's done with a capital "E".

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 * [As part of an experiment, Tory is spraying bees with vodka.]
 * Tory: Oh, it's terrible! They're drunk!

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 * [Tory is trying to revive some of the bees sprayed with vodka.]
 * Kari: Wow, Tory, you're like some kind of bee whisperer!

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 * [Tory and Grant are talking over if the bees are really dead or not.]
 * Grant: Why don't you do some Bee CPR? BPR!

Shredded Plane

 * [Jamie is having trouble starting a chainsaw.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): What? No elaborate setup? No scale tests? No blueprint plans? This could be the quickest Mythbust on record... if Jamie can start the chainsaw.

Archimedes Death Ray

 * [The MythBusters and the team from M.I.T. are trying to quickly set up for the test.]
 * Adam: Work faster, slaves let's go! Protect your masters!

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 * Tory: What in the hell is that thing?!
 * Adam: It's the disco mirror from hell!

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 * [after Prof. Wallace requests Jamie to move the ship directly in front of the mirror array]
 * Jamie: So holding still isn't good enough? We have to move into the line of fire?
 * Professor Wallace: Shut up, you lazy Roman pig, and do as you're told!

Helium Football

 * [Adam inhales some of the helium used to inflate some footballs]
 * Adam: Okay, these are ready. Don't tell him which ones we have.

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 * [Adam has just inhaled some helium.]
 * Adam: Well, it's weird talking without any oxygen in your system... WOW!

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 * Adam: There's still a couple anomalies, out of 10 there were 3. That's good enough for MythBusters.

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 * Adam: It amazes me that you still don't realize we're filming a television show.
 * Jamie: I'd think we would at least aspire to not be idiots?
 * Adam: And yet we would fail.

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 * [The MythBusters have just inflated a football until it burst. Afterwards, Adam puts it on his head.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): So there's your answer. At 110 PSI you'll lose a football, but gain a hat.
 * Jamie: What are you doing?
 * Adam: I put everything on my head.

Facts About Flatulence

 * Adam: My dignity and good television—they'll never meet.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): At least not on this show.

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 * Adam: Roger that! We have flatus contained. (imitates klaxon) AWOO-GAH! AWOO-GAH!

Franklin's Kite

 * Tory: Ballistics gel—I love it!

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 * [A kite, whose tail has a rock tied to it, swoops toward Tory, barely missing his head.]
 * Tory: It's the death kite—the kite of punishment.
 * [The kite swings the rock and smacks Tory in the groin.]
 * Grant: [laughing] That made it all worthwhile!

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 * Tory: Well, we killed a dead President.
 * Grant: He (Ben Franklin) was never President.
 * [Grant and Kari walk away, stifling giggles.]
 * Tory: Wasn't he? Damn it.

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 * Kari: I've heard that in every schoolroom I've ever been in...'cause I've been in a lot.

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 * Kari: It sounds really, really dangerous.
 * Grant: It could be very dangerous.
 * Tory: Or it could be a lot of fun.

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 * Grant: Stability appears to be an issue.
 * Rob Lee: You don't say. Grant's kite is doing more spins than a washing machine.

Helium Raft

 * Adam: Look at this. It's a cathedral... of failure.

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 * [Adam is stuck upside down in a net, suspended six feet in the air by a gigantic helium-filled raft.]
 * Adam: This wins as the strangest position I've ever been in...on this show.
 * Kari:[looking directly at the camera] Don't you love how he qualifies it with "on this show"?

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 * Adam: [after inhaling helium] Once, in every generation, a myth comes along that does not thrill us.

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 * Adam: I'm fine. I'm upside-down, in a net, under the biggest helium balloon thing you've ever seen, but I'm fine.

Cell Phones on a Plane

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): The MythBusters feel the need. The need... to be very, very still.

Bullets Fired Up

 * Adam: I'm searching across the desert for a pencil-sized hole!

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 * [Adam holds a plastic-wrapped pig's head over his face like a mask]
 * Adam: Jamie, please don't shoot bullets at my head.
 * Jamie: He's only got one ear.
 * Adam: We don't need ears to test the lethality of falling bullets.

Myths Reopened

 * Adam: With all the safety precautions we are taking, check this, check that, you have to stand back and say: Damn! I'm lightin' salamis, man! I'm making a rocket out of meat!

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 * [Jamie is examining the remains of the salami test rocket after it exploded.]
 * Jamie: There's meat everywhere!

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 * Jamie: This may look like salami... it may smell like salami... it may even taste like salami... but it's rocket fuel.

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 * Jamie: Well, this is one of the strangest things I've ever done... I'm about to chuck a salami into the lathe!

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 * Tory: I'm washing my gun.

Mind Control

 * Adam: So, guys, how did it go?
 * Tory: Psychic helmet totally works.
 * Adam: Really?!?
 * Tory: Actually, no, not really...

Dynamite Paint Job

 * [Jamie is naming his explosion painting contraption.]
 * Jamie: The flower of death.
 * Adam: Los flores de los muertos! (The flowers of the dead)

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 * Adam: You're gonna paint your house with explosives? That's crazy!

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 * Adam: Remember kids, I have health insurance!

Exploding Pants

 * Adam: [to camera] If we don't meet again... I love you.

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 * Kari: [while watching "rubbing machine"] This farmer sure's walking fast.
 * Tory: Well, he's in a hurry.

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 * Tory: If it's worth doing it's worth overdoing, right?

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 * [Buster is about to be blown up by explosive-coated overalls.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Friends and family of Buster should look away now.

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 * Tory: Somebody ordered some exploding pants?

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 * Grant: Well they singed the hell out him, but they didn't actually blow up, there was just a lot of fire.
 * Kari: You are so hard to please.
 * Tory: Yeah, if I was a farmer, and my pants did that, I'd say "my pants blew up!", I wouldn't worry about specifics.

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 * [Tory is making explosives from herbicide]
 * Tory: Frank, why are you standing so far away?
 * Frank Doyle: Because I wanna continue to live.
 * Tory: So then the next question is, why am I standing so close?

Crimes and Myth-demeanors 1

 * Kari: (From a lift as the Build Team builds the assault course) Now remember that the safety word is "Run!"

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 * Adam: I think Jamie's just going to be like [mimicking Jamie's impending crawl up an air duct with magnets] "CHUNG!" "CHUNG!" "CHUNG!" And I believe, in a security manual, the proper response to that sound coming from your duct is to just riddle your duct with bullets.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): With Grant and Kari heading up security, bullet riddling is unlikely. But with Tory...you never know.

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 * [There is a loud clang as Jamie begins noisily climbing the duct]
 * Adam: [laughing] Why, Thor, the god of thunder, is trying to enter my building!
 * [There is another clang as Jamie continues climbing the duct. Adam laughs again]
 * Tory: Somebody needs to check that air conditioner!
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): [as Jamie continues] Here's some key phrases from the surreptitious entry heist manual: Be the breeze [clang] As light as a feather [clang] The foot fall of a kitten. [clang]

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 * Jamie: Surreptitious? I don't think so.

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 * Jamie: Lets get cracking.
 * Adam: Um... cracking?
 * Jamie: What?

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 * Adam: I guess I could break into a building too by beating on the ducting with a sledgehammer.

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 * Kari: Is there anything more attractive than the sound of gum being chewed?
 * Tory: Yes there is, watching you chew that gum.

Breakfast Cereal

 * [Jamie has mixed some cardboard in the blender, and tasted the result.]
 * Jamie: Kinda reminds me of high school, for some reason.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Ah, Jamie's school days. Playing football, growing facial hair, and drinking cardboard

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 * [Adam tastes some liquified cardboard.]
 * Adam: Y'know, it tastes uncannily like cardboard.

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 * Adam: Remember this, kids — cardboard is low in fat!

Steam Cannon

 * Adam: It's wedged in there like... I don't know if I could build something that could wedge it in there that hard...
 * [Adam looks back at the steam cannon.]
 * Adam: Oh - apparently, I did!

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 * Jamie: But didn't we spend two seasons busting the last Archimedes myth?

Killer Whirlpool

 * [Holding a box for a model of a container ship.]
 * Adam: It's the toy every kid wants for Christmas! A container ship! "Gee, thanks dad! Now I can replicate international commerce!"

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 * [Adam has thrown up after being spun around in a whirlpool.]
 * Jess: Urgh - smells like pizza.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Welcome to the team, Jess.

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 * [Adam pulls on a wetsuit in preparation for the whirlpool.]
 * Adam: [Imitating heavy French accent.] Is everybody ready for DIVING?!

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 * Adam: Do you care to explain what we're doing 60 feet above the ground, standing above 9000 gallons of swirling water and...I'm in a wetsuit?
 * Jamie: Sure!

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 * [Adam is floating on his back after being spun around in the whirlpool tank.]
 * Adam: Have you ever really looked at the sky?

Snowplow Flips Car

 * Grant: This is a cursed item. There are cursed items in the world and this is one of them. It's everything we try and do to it, goes wrong.

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 * Grant: Make no mistake, this is a deathtrap.

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 * Kari:I don't know but this feels very dangerous, I have a bad feeling about this, something is going to go wrong.
 * Grant: And that is different from the other times how...?

Diet Coke and Mentos

 * [Adam has made a nozzle on the lathe that looks remarkably like a lightsaber handle.]
 * Adam: ...I did what any boy would make—uh, what am I allowed to call it, a plasma sword?—except, instead of a limited beam of pure plasma, it's soda!
 * [Adam pretends he is fighting with the nozzle as if it is a lightsaber.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Not so much Yoda, but soda.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Adam, for reasons known only to himself, puts a bottle of cola on Jamie's lathe.
 * [The bottle unscrews and comes out of the lathe, spilling everywhere. Adam laughs.]
 * Adam: [to camera] Okay, this'll be our little secret.

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 * Adam: (in French accent) I have been a bubble sculptor for about 20 years. The Bubbles are very fine way to sculpt the real world.

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 * [Adam and Jamie light a ten-foot tower of methane bubbles on fire; the bubbles erupt in a massive fireball.]
 * Adam: That was like the beast dying at the end of the movie! "WRRROOOOOEEEAAAGH!"

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 * Adam: This is one I've known about for a long time, it's called "Dry Ice Bomb." Years ago I went to an ice company to pick up some stuff for Jamie, this was like 20 years ago, 15 years ago, and it said: "You cannot buy dry ice unless you are 18", and I thought: "Why would that be?" so I said "Hey, how come you can't buy dry ice unless you are over 18", and the guy goes: (assumes a "surfer dude" voice) "Oh, 'cause you can stick it in a 2-liter bottle and make a huge bomb out of it; it blows up, it'll, like, set car alarms off across the street; it's really cool! (normal voice): and I thought, "You're new here, aren't you?" Since then I've always wanted to try it.

Rough Road Driving

 * Tory [talking on two-way radio to Grant] Okay, Grant... ready for your 45 mile an hour run? Paramedics are... nowhere to be found. [to camera crew] This may be the last time we see Grant.

Shattering Subwoofer

 * Jamie: [camera shows a shot of Jamie's shirt] This better work... my shirt's all dirty.

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 * Jamie: We have three melodies...they're called First Gear, Second Gear, and Third Gear.

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 * Adam: Inexplicably, Adam is wearing chainmail.

Earthquake Machine

 * Adam: We're 100 feet away, and I can still feel it moving the bridge... it's eerie.

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 * Adam: And now we're going to see if we can shake this bridge apart.
 * Rob Lee: Uh, hold on Adam...
 * Adam: [in a flashback clip] I promise that if this works, we'll use this power only for good.
 * Rob Lee: Yeah, right Adam.

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 * Rob Lee: Keen-eyed observers will note that the guys are actually standing on the bridge they're trying to destroy. Confidence in Tesla's machine isn't exactly sky high.
 * Adam: Neither Jamie or I give a high percentage of anything actually occurring out here, nonetheless MythBusters is nothing if not a compendium of ways in which Jamie and I have been wrong.

Stove Myths

 * Tory: I'll do the lava lamps.
 * Kari: I'll do the stove.
 * Grant: [pauses] ...I'll do the math.
 * Rob Lee: While Grant calculates with what to do with his day off...

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 * Grant: A theory is that the shock of cold water will— [lava lamp suddenly explodes]
 * Tory: [Laughs] You should have seen the look on your face, it was priceless.

Deadly Straw

 * Jamie: [commenting on the penetrating power of piano wire on the palm tree] Hey, what do you think? You think we can get that [piano] wire to go all the way through an engine block?

Primary Perception

 * Tory: Cool, we get to torture yogurt!

Killer Cable Snaps

 * Adam: I love hearing big sounds in the next room.

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 * Adam: [being whacked repetitively on the shoulder by the cable] Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow.

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 * Adam: Oh please, please, let there be a pig cut in half in there!

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 * Adam: (Referring to their lack of success in cutting the pig in half) Can we get a sword?
 * Jamie: (laughs) Meat cleaver?

Pottery Record

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): The voice of an angel rings out...
 * Kari: (yells at full volume) TORY!
 * Rob Lee: ...or maybe, make that the devil.
 * Tory: That was a good one, Kari. Now I know what it would be like to be married to you.

Air Cylinder Rocket

 * Jamie: It was the lard that did it!

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 * [A strange noise sounds when Jamie opens an air cylinder]:
 * Jamie: These tanks are actually filled with geese...and they're complaining.
 * Adam: (silence) Was that a joke? Fascinating...

Rough Road Driving

 * Tory: Alright, Grant. I'm ready to start breaking windows with rocks, but before I stick you in that car to shoot it, I wanna make sure we can actually break a windshield with a rock.

Exploding Lighter

 * Adam: The only thing that differentiates you and me from a couple of 14 year-old pyromaniacs... is ballistic glass.

Concrete Glider

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): ...there's a chance that maybe Adam will let [Jamie] forget about it.
 * Adam: [imitating Jamie] It's not about winning or losing, it's about proving the concept. [normal voice, slightly giddy] But I won!!!
 * Rob Lee: ...But unlikely.

Firearms Folklore

 * [Tory has swung a hammer at a nail, but missed.]
 * Tory: I was inches away from hitting it.
 * Kari: Inches?
 * Grant: "I was just inches away!"
 * [Tory swings again and misses again.]
 * Tory: I hit the same spot as before.
 * Grant: Then why don't you put the nail there? (laughs)
 * Rob Lee: It's worth noting that a smart remark rarely goes unpunished.
 * [Tory swings again, but the hammer slips out of his hand and hits Grant]

Anti-Gravity Device

 * Kari: You see that hole where it blasted off?
 * Tory: No.
 * Kari: Nope, neither do I.

22,000 Foot Fall

 * Adam: So, we need you guys's help. Um, we wanna focus on the large-scale experiment, and we want you guys to do the bench tests for us; the small-scale experiments.
 * Kari: Aye, aye, captain! Whatcha need?

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 * Rob Lee: With a plan as concrete as that, what could possibly go wrong?

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 * Adam: Perfect. I'll tell you what. Um, all we need is to get him up to 120 mph. That's a human's terminal velocity; we know that from umpteen myths we've done about people falling.

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 * Tory: Well, OK, considering we're going to be blowing up a sheet of glass, it's probably a good idea to, uh, give ourselves a little bit of protection.

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 * Adam: Say it with me, "Jamie wants big boom!"

Lights on or Off?

 * Rob Lee: But first, they need to do some shopping, which will highlight another question: "How many MythBusters does it take to buy a lightbulb?"

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 * Kari: These will explode, these will melt, this will kill you—this is great.
 * Grant: Welcome to my world.

Hindenburg Mystery

 * [Adam is holding two bottles, the labels of which have been obscured by the censor.]
 * Adam: This ingredient is made of blur. Ha! And this has blur in it too. Blur is very dangerous.  You don't wanna mix blur with blur.

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 * [Adam is about to demonstrate a thermite reaction.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): For this cooking lesson, Adam will need the fire suit, and it's safety masks all around. So - just like gumbo night at Adam's.

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 * Adam: [after a thermite square ignites without warning] Deuteronomy!

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 * [Adam has just lit a panel of cotton. It is burning extremely slowly in contrast to the rapid destruction of the Hindenburg.]
 * Adam: We don't need a high-speed on this, we need a time-lapse.
 * [Cue time-lapse of the panel burning.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Anything you say, Adam.

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 * [The first test Hindenburg catches fire and nearly burns out in the shop.]
 * Adam: That would be the textbook definition of irony, kids...

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 * Adam: Next on Discovery, the world's deadliest piñata!

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 * [Adam had just ignited the hydrogen under a skin sample covering a wooden box, which explodes violently.]
 * Adam: WHOA! (in quiet voice) Okaaaay... is everybody okay?
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Eh... fresh underwear for Mr. Savage, please.

Speed Cameras

 * Adam: Show me what you got, cheater.

Exploding Nitro Patch

 * Kari: Why is it that the first day of rain we get for the entire year, is going to be the day we're using... high explosives and electricity - whoooo!!!

Dog Myths

 * Jamie: Now behave, or we're going to make you into a coat.

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 * Adam: So, can you clearly communicate what clever canine conundrum you're currently concocting?
 * Jamie: What?!?
 * Adam: What's the myth?

Myths Reopened

 * Tory: [Holding shotgun] Boy, you'd better marry my daughter!

Walking on Water

 * Adam: If I had any dignity, that would have been humiliating.

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 * Adam: (To Jamie) Come, Silent Walrus, let us storm the castle! I will don my safety gear!

<hr width="50%" /> [While wearing comically large pontoons on his feet with an array of diving gear.]
 * Adam: Oh, I am as stealthy as the night. Don't I look like silent death, bringing justice in the night?

Big Rig Myths

 * Adam:(In a hill-billy accent) Dude, give it more gas! Ah hell. That ain't a truck no more, that's a dynamometer!

"Viewers' Pick Special"

 * Adam: It bleeds!

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 * Jamie: One way to tell that Mythbusters has been in the area: look for shrapnel in the trees.

Hot Bullets

 * [Jamie is about to shoot an oven door with a shotgun.]
 * Adam: (with British accent) All right, Jamie, here's your motivation: this oven door 'as run off with your wife, [Jamie laughs] and you've decided to gear up and get even. So go for it!
 * [Jamie shoots oven door couple of times. Adam starts laughing at the second shot.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): I guess the moral is: don't elope with Mrs. Hyneman.

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 * [Adam gives his assessment of what happens when an aerosol can is tossed in a campfire.]
 * Adam: While I don't necessarily think it's lethal, it definitely took a while to happen. So you might think, "Oh well. I guess nothing's gonna happen." and come back over here... BOOM! All of a sudden, your head's in a fireball and you're missing an eyebrow - and I know what that's like.
 * [Cue flashback from Cell Phone Destruction.]

Red Flag to a Bull

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): ...and our trio of tall-tale tacklers (are) speaking in bull.
 * Grant: Moooo!
 * Tory: Those are whales.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): ...and Grant stunt-double requires an CPR.
 * [Grant is seen performing "CPR" on his dummy.]
 * Grant: Don't give up on me now!
 * Tory: Are you done playing with yourself?

Bull in a China Shop

 * Grant: You know how they say Tory is like a bull in a china shop?
 * Tory: No.
 * Kari: Yes.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): So the first guy has let the team down. They were expecting a bull in a china shop to be like... well, a bull in a china shop.

Grappling Hook

 * Adam: It’s a key component on the belt of Nocturnal-Echo-Locating-Flying-Mammal-Man.
 * Jamie: Batman?
 * Adam: Yes. Shhh!

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 * Jamie: You all set, Batman?
 * Adam: I'm all set, Boy Wonder.

Ring Punch

 * Grant: So, you named your guy there?
 * Tory: Yes.
 * Grant: What did you name him?
 * Tory: Pork-loin-io.
 * Kari: You did not.
 * Tory: He's an evil pig-man.

Phone Booth Quick Change
Tory: Let's go!

90 Degree Turn

 * [The force of the hook shooter causes both the hook and shooter to fire with great force—in opposite directions.]
 * Kari: Ah, the Newton's Laws! We forgot the Newton's Laws!

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 * Tory: (regarding the hook shooter) That was that first time I ever felt any real danger.

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 * Tory: Holy air cannon Grantman!
 * Grant: How long have you been waiting to unleash that one?
 * Tory: All day!

Exploding Water Heater

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): The water heater shot up so high, you could order a pizza while you wait.

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 * Adam: (stepping out of the house they built) Hi everyone! Welcome to the Mythbusters Clubhouse!

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 * Adam: House? What house?

Pants on Fire

 * Kari: [about the myth] This has Tory, written all over it!
 * Tory: Why am I always written all over it?

Shrinking Pants

 * Kari: Are you ready to let go of the muffin top?
 * Grant: I am ready to let go of the muffin top.
 * Tory: But is the muffin top ready to let go of you?

Supersize Shark

 * Adam: Blue Pointer 2. Makes me wonder what happened to the Blue Pointer 1.

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 * Adam: Are you planning to be buried in something very similar to this?
 * Jamie: I'm not gonna get buried.
 * Adam: No?
 * Jamie: No!
 * Adam: Just get your ashes scattered into space or something?
 * Jamie: Mulch!
 * Adam: Mulch?!?
 * Jamie: Yeah!
 * Adam: You'll feed yourself into a wood chipper?!
 * Jamie: Yeah!
 * Adam: Ah!

Supersize Rocket Car

 * Jamie: Go ahead, tailgate, see if I care.
 * Jamie: The Batmobile can kiss my butt!

Supersize Cruise Ship Waterskiing
Tory: [in the water with a bird next to him] Hey, my little friend! You better not attract any sharks, you little [censored].

Shooting Fish In A Barrel
. [after Jamie has fired hundreds of rounds at the bass with an M134 minigun]
 * Adam: The people at home want more! Right, guys? You want more? Okay, they want more, Jamie!

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 * Adam: My head is sticking out of the bottom of the barrel. [pauses]

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): We need to stress that no fish have been or will be injured in filming this myth. They're mostly blown to pieces.

Hot Chili Cures

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Sombreros, boots and bandoleers. A desperately clichéd battle looms between the tragically uncool, the undeniably hot... and these two idiots.

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 * Grant: [about the fact that he hasn't eaten this much spicy food] I hope that my head doesn't explode.

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 * [after the toothpaste failed to work]
 * Grant: Toothpaste stays in the bathroom - not on the dinner table!

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 * Grant: My Prediction: Pain. And lots of it

Elephants Scared Of Mice

 * Adam: You expose the mouse and all hell breaks loose!

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 * Adam: So, how are we going to get this mouse to those elephants over there?
 * Jamie: Slingshot!

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 * Rob Lee (US narrator): MacGyver and elephant dung... Must've missed that episode.

Pirates 2

 * Tory: [As Tory and Kari start to water down the sand] It's like watering a little Grant flower.

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 * Adam: I hope I don't step on a octopus.

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 * Tory: I've been a baaad pirate.

Airplane Hour

 * Airplane simulator: Don't sink.
 * Jamie: Why is it telling me not to think?
 * Airplane simulator: Don't sink.

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 * [After Jamie crashes a flight simulator]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Jamie hits the deck, putting the terror into terra firma.

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 * [Discussing a myth that will involve Tory skydiving.]
 * Kari: Logistically, it's a little more complicated than just throwing a dummy out of a plane.
 * [Camera shot moves to broken dummy.]
 * Rob Lee: Logistically, more difficult. [Camera shot slides over to show Tory and the dummy side by side.] But essentially the same.

James Bond Special 1

 * Jamie: It's Hyneman. James Hyneman.

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 * Grant: My name is Grant... Imahara. What's my name?

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 * Kari: Anyone else feel like an evil genius? (Tory guffaws)


 * Grant: Bye-bye, double-oh Buster! (all three laugh manically)

Lead Balloon

 * Jamie: [whilst making the fragile lead balloon] Little did the MythBusters know there was a herd of cattle in the next room!

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 * Adam: This is a lead balloon! Who has one of these?!  Nobody!

Surfing with Dynamite

 * [Tory leaps into tub of water]
 * Tory: Yahoooo!!!
 * Grant: Have you lost your damn mind?

Airplane on a Conveyor Belt

 * Jamie: I'm not sure if I can handle this, actually. We're using this particular item the way it was intended to be used.

James Bond Special 2

 * [Tory is sitting next to statue]
 * Tory: [In Italian accent] So, I finish my statue, and I like to call her 'Hey, there, Lonely Girl', but I canna' look at her too long, 'cause she make me cry. So, now we're gonna try to chop her head off!

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 * [Statues are being brought in]
 * Grant: Hey, be careful with those statues, I hear the heads fall off at the drop of a hat.

MacGyver Special

 * [Adam is working on picking the lock on his and Jamie's cell door]
 * Grant: Well, he's got the filaments, and he has lockpick experience.
 * Tory: Can we just pump in the nerve gas now?

Sharks 2

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): But it seems that either the sun or the jet lag has got to Tory.
 * Tory: We are going to start at the giant iguana. And if that doesn't happen, we will go north until we see the two humongous parrots. Hopefully they won't eat us. And let's not forget the floating dolphin head! Everyone wants to see it! I know I do!

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 * Grant: Oh, damn you and your science!

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 * Grant: Oh {censored}, something just touched me!

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 * Grant: I just want to say to whatever fans posted this on the fan-site, I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU!

Cabin Fever

 * Kari:Can I remind you that I'm in the exact same conditions as they are, except I have to watch them be bored?

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 * Kari: I'm pulling a trick on Jamie and Adam, with the help of... Mr. Abominable Snowman!

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 * [Kari is sending a fake yeti to bug Adam and Jamie.]
 * Jamie: (unenthusiastic) Oh great, we got a yeti outside.

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 * Kari: Haha! Adam's hiding in the toilet! (sticks out tongue at the screen displaying Adam's sheer bravery)

Moose Mayhem

 * Tory: Do ya think I'm excited? You better believe I'm excited.  We just built a rubber moose and now we're gonna crash cars into it.  It doesn't get better than this.

NASA Moon Landing

 * Tory: [about marshmallow spaceman in vacuum chamber] That's what happens to you in space if you don't have a spacesuit.
 * Kari: Oh, he's like a raisin!

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 * [Kari has a pair of astronaut's gloves draped over her shoulders.]
 * Kari: It's a portable hug!

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 * [Kari puts on a moon boot]
 * Tory: You know how to moonwalk?
 * [Kari shuffles awkwardly backwards]
 * Tory: Okay, so the answer's 'no.'

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 * Tory: Now all we need to do is go to the moon and try this for real. [Pause] I'm just kidding, we don't have the budget.

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 * Grant: [about vacuum chambers] And you're actually gonna let us use it?
 * Vacuum Glove Technician: Yeah, I think I will, it's just, uh, be careful.
 * Rob Lee: He's obviously never seen the show before.

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 * Rob Lee: It's the MythBusters motto. If it's worth doing - it's worth overdoing.

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 * Adam: [about spacesuit he's wearing] By the way, I should point out, this is not a real spacesuit. It's just my 'wear-around-town' spacesuit.

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 * Adam: It's a thing to wear a rig like this. It takes a lot of stamina. It's also making me quite sore in some very private places.

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 * Adam: [about conspiracy theorists] What do you think?
 * Apollo Specialist: I think they're crazy.

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 * Tory: [after busting a moon landing myth] In your face, conspiracy theorists!

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 * [Jamie and Adam are floating in NASA's special zero-gravity plane]
 * Adam: That's a hundred-percent wacky right there!!

Viral Hour

 * Grant: Non-dairy creamer cannon in three, two, one...
 * The cannon exploded, one of the biggest explosions on the show.
 * Tory: Oh my God. That was frightening.
 * Kari: Terrifying.
 * Tory: Did you get that on high-speed?
 * Rob Lee: Yeah, we did remember to push the R button, on the off-chance that this might be one of the biggest fireballs ever.
 * Tory: This was frightening. But seriously, there was a moment where we were like "Oh crap, this was a bad idea."
 * Kari: All I heard in my head was run, and I started up the hill as fast as I could go. And I'm still on my adrenaline buzz right now.

Phonebook Friction

 * [While interleaving two phone books together...]
 * Adam: Does this remind you of when you used to count money for the mob?
 * Jamie: I was a hitman; I wasn't a money counter.

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 * [Two military tanks are attached to two phonebooks, in order to pull them apart]
 * Jamie: I just wanted to make a phone call. That's all I wanted to do!

Blind Driving

 * [After Adam destroys the course while driving blindfolded]
 * Driving instructor: That was great!
 * Adam: Was it?
 * Driving instructor: You nailed that! Every single one of them!
 * [Adam laughs hysterically]

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Beer Goggles

 * [While drunk.]
 * Kari: What is red and smells like blue paint?
 * Adam: I don't know. What?
 * Kari: Red paint.

Stone Cold Sober

 * [Jamie slaps Adam in the face.]
 * Adam: AH! Holy crap! Holy bleeping bleepity bleep!
 * Jamie: Can I do that again? That was fun.
 * Adam: No, that made my head ring!

Hwacha

 * Grant: HWAAAACHAAAAAAAA!!!

Viewer Sequel Threequel

 * Rob Lee: It's Crouching Savage, Hidden Hyneman.

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 * Jamie: Well, we've got our bamboo. It's time to go back to the shop and torture some dummies.

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 * Tory: We're gonna blow the CRAP out of that toilet! Get it?

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 * Adam: [In an East Indian accent] Jamie is imagining himself to be a plant.

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 * Jamie: This may look nice and sunny. And it is. But it's also a torture chamber. Or will be soon.

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 * Tory: Yeah, normally Grant's a better shot when he's using the toilet.

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 * Tory: I feel like I've been lied to. What I saw on that internet video was an explosion.

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 * Kari: Next on MythBusters, extreme plumbing!

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 * Adam: I ate a radio for science!

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 * Jamie: [referring to whether brandy from a St. Bernard will bring a person back from the brink of death] Or this is like an apertif before I eat the dog?
 * Adam: You can't say that!

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 * Kari: It's always a good day when you start it at the bomb range.

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 * Grant: We love pianos. We're not enjoying this in the least. ...Okay, maybe just a little bit.

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 * J.D. Nelson: What I think you need is the MythBusters Concerto in C4.

Demolition Derby Special

 * Jamie: Excellent! I see everybody got the message
 * Kari: Yeah, Dress for Demolition Derby Special
 * Grant: So what's exactly going on here?
 * Adam: Ha, ha, ha!, You're gonna love this (Points to Jamie) Tell em'
 * Jamie: Well, its the...
 * Adam: MYTHBUSTERS DEMOLITION DERBY SPECIAL!!!
 * Tory: Sweet!
 * Adam: I know..., (Points to Jamie)give him the details!
 * Jamie: Well, we've got...
 * Adam: FOUR MYTHS ABOUT SMASHING, TRASHING AND CRASHING CARS, BUSSES AND TRUCKS!!!
 * Grant: Nice...
 * Jamie: (Clears Throat)
 * Jamie: To do this we'll be using...
 * Adam: HELICOPTERS, EXPLOSIVES AND ROCKET SLEDS...
 * Jamie: (Stares daggers at Adam)
 * Adam: What?!?

Compact Compact Supersized

 * [Having just obliterated a car by smashing a rocket sled into it.]
 * Jamie: So our goal was to fuse metal and pancake the car. Did we succeed?  …What car?

Exploding Bumper

 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Don't you just hate it when something you've paid good money for won't break the way you want it to?

Boomerang Bullet

 * Tory: Well we proved one thing, gravity still works.

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 * Adam: One bullet, three paving stones, and a cardboard hoosier... and a cartridge in a pear tree.

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 * Adam: Does this remind you of when you used to hunt mastodons?

Soda Cup Killer

 * Adam: [Before hitting a target with soda cups] Every target needs a motivation. [Holds up a picture of Jamie] Yeah!!

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 * Adam: Mmm, delicious MythBusters non-trademark slush drink. Icy, fruity, blue, and potentially lethal. Use with caution.

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 * Adam: Another in a long series of things: "What the hell am I doing!?"

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 * Jamie: Did you hear that? That's the sound of Mr. Hyneman having fun.

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 * Jamie: [Jamie reveals his soda can air cannon]  I call it my little Pop Gun!

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 * Buster: (On seeing Jamie's Can Shooter) (censored)

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 * Adam: We often learn at the end of an episode of MythBusters, everyday objects can, in fact, be made lethal if Jamie builds a gun to shoot them.

Fall Guys

 * Tory: Alright, when we talked about this in the blueprint room, it seemed pretty straightforward. We just grab on to an edge and see how long we can hang on. But now, standing on top of this seventy-five foot building, I'm wondering is this really necessary? I mean, can't we just test this hanging off a doorframe?

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 * Tory: [Grant is suspended on a harness]   Anybody got a bat?

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 * Rob Lee: And as Adam once said...
 * Adam: Gravity, man... it's not just a good idea - it's the LAW!

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 * Grant: My prediction is I will hang on for ten minutes, at least, and then you'll see the traces of my fingernails going down the wall.

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 * Grant: Does this harness make me look heavy?

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 * Grant: Alright, you ready for two inches?
 * Jessi: Look, my fingers aren't even two inches long, of course I'm ready for two inches.

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 * Grant: That, my friends, is one half of one inch. And that is about how much I can hang on. I'm predicting a lot of pain.

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 * Grant: I'd love to see the action hero who can hang on to that!

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 * Tory: [Immitating Arnold Schwarzenegger]  Get to the choppah, Grant!

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 * Tory: [After Grant climbs into the 'helicopter' in a strong wind gust]  Damn! Thank God his pants didn't come off!

Dive To Survive

 * Adam: Good morning.

Phone Book Freedom

 * Kari: Science get more fun, when I get a bigger gun.

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 * Tory: I don't know about you guys, but I'm having an A-Team moment!

"Spy Car Escape"

 * Jamie: [Speaking through walkie-talkie]  Hey guys?
 * Adam: [Also speaking through walkie-talkie]  Yeah?
 * Jamie: See if you can keep up, okay?
 * Adam: Ha! Roger that, Secret Agent Code Name Walrus!

Bouncing Bullet

 * Adam: The difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.

Clothed vs. Unclothed

 * Adam: Man, Jamie, it snowed like crazy out here last night!
 * Jamie: Yeah, this is how it snows in San Francisco: in plastic bags!

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 * Jamie: Can we show a naked snowman on television? This is a family show.
 * Adam: Maybe we'll put a fig leaf.

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 * Adam: [Imitating Jamie] Just remember, everyone, we're working in a really cold environment, so if your fingers start to lose feeling, make sure you go inside and get a cup of tea or something.

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 * Jamie: Let's count 'em down [the top 10 most popular myths] Top 40 style.
 * Adam: All right, get ready for your favorite myth!

Silver Spoon and Champagne

 * Adam: [pours a glass of champagne] Ooh, I'm feeling lightheaded already. It's like drinking stars!

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 * [Jamie and Adam do a blind taste test to test the fizziness of the champagne.]
 * Rob Lee: Maybe it's the holiday spirit. For once - they agree!

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 * Jamie: Another Christmas myth up the chimney.

Buster Special

 * Adam: I just had one of those "what the hell are we doing" moments!

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 * [On Buster's new skin]
 * Jamie: I don't like the pink color, it's a little creepy.
 * Adam: Yeah, it's a little creepy, but so is what we do to Buster.

Shop till You Drop

 * [Jamie is holding a manly thong.]
 * Jamie: A lot of people watch this show. I'm sure some of them are gonna thinking about me wearing this particular piece of clothing on. Um... [chuckles] and uh... I'm gonna put it away now...

MythBusters Outtakes

 * Adam: [in a London accent] It's a lovely sculpture. It's all about man's inhumanity to man... in a pipe and rope sort of way.

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 * Adam: If we appear on Letterman or Leno and we bring our famous chicken cannon and shoot it off, I want someone to get on their knees and just blow me.

MythBusters Revealed

 * Peter Rees (executive producer): [to Jamie] Why don't you ever pretend to be like Adam?
 * Jamie: What? You mean stupid?

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 * Peter Rees: Adam... is a disaster area.

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 * Kari: Tory tends to clean up, Jamie is neurotic about cleaning up, and Adam is the Tasmanian Devil of filth.

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 * Adam: [In strange accent] Do not try what you are about to see at home. We are what you call 'experts'.
 * [Silence]
 * Jamie: [In normal voice] And what am I supposed to say?
 * Adam: [Attempting to imitate Jamie's voice, while moving Jamie's jaw by hand] That is right, we do this for a living.

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 * [Kari is dancing and clowning around.]
 * Tory: Not a lot going on upstairs; but God, she's cute!

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 * Adam: [In erudite British accent] Here we see the Hyneman in his natural habitat. The Hyneman prefers to live in an extremely clean environment, removing all detritus from its surroundings... at every opportunity.

Hollywood on Trial
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 * [Kari is being painted silver for a myth; Adam pops in to take a look.]
 * Adam: I didn't know we got slave girls.

MythBusters Jaws Special

 * Adam: We've got a robot in the water, he's stuffed with tuna, and it's just another day here at MythBusters.

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 * [Jamie is underwater in a shark cage holding Buster while he's attempting to punch sharks. The shark attacks are getting aggressive.]
 * Jamie: I just had one of those "what the hell am I doing" moments, over.

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 * Kari: If I see a shark coming up with a beret, I'm gonna be mad at you.

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 * Kari: Now that he's not so scared, it's a little less evil.

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 * Kari: I think we need to have one of us get into the chainmail. Not me.
 * Adam: Not me.
 * Kari: Clearly Jamie.

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 * Jamie: I understanding these things [SCUBA tanks] have about a million—or actually, it's 1.3 million—pounds of explosive force. I'm not sure what that means, but it sounds like a lot.

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 * [After being loaned some of the original floating barrel props used in the movie Jaws.]
 * Adam: The only thing we're told we can't do is burn them, blow them up, or lose them.
 * Tory: Has he watched the show?

Mega Movie Myths 2-Hour Special

 * Adam: "Danger" is my middle name.

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 * Jamie: I'm a little worried because it worked too well, so now we'll go full scale, and it'll blow up.

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 * Jamie: I now pronounce this "Hyneman Mountain."

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 * Jamie: We're going to jump the hump.

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 * [After an European Rapier Sword is cut by a Japanese Sword.]
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): I hope D'Artagnan ducked, because his sword was sliced.

Pirate Myths

 * Adam: (pretending to be a pirate) It's time for some pillagin', it's time for some robbin', it's time to blow some stuff up.

Cannonball vs. Shrapnel

 * Adam: That's one of the most... wrongity-wrong things we've ever done.

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 * Adam: The Blowhard 3000—the next evolution in pirate technology!

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 * Adam: I just don't want any leaks. I don't like leaks.

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 * [A large tumbleweed comes up to Adam as he's sanding down the cannonball.]
 * Adam: That's not a pirate thing! That's a tumbleweed! On ya go...

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 * Adam: (pretending to be a pirate) What do ya mean we got no more cannonballs?!

Eyepatch Fad

 * Adam: (pretending to be a pirate) Let's pillage
 * Tory: I don't know if that's legal in California.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Kari's off to see an optima-... an optha-... an eye doctor.

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 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Kari's got the science behind the myth covered... and if she can just find her way to the door, we'll be on our way.
 * [Kari fumbles briefly with the door before turning to the ophthalmologist in exasperation.]
 * Kari: I can't see anything still.

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 * Kari: (pretending to be a pirate) Booty goes inside it!

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 * Kari: Don't Harm The Maiden
 * Grant: Don't Harm The Maiden

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 * Tory: (Cuban accent) 'Cu wanna play rough? OK. Say 'hello to my little friend.

Holiday Special

 * [Adam and Jamie open a box of newly arrived toy monkeys]
 * Adam: There we go, oh, they're hideous!

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 * [Jamie tests Mentos and Cola apparatus]
 * Jess: Ha ha, Jamie, that's excellent! Sort of.

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 * [A forklift lifts Buster into position]
 * Adam: Arise, my son!

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 * [After being hit by shrapnel from a pair of plastic hands]
 * Kari: Do we want to talk about why I just got hit in the head with a thumb?
 * Grant, Tory: Um...no.

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 * [Describing the workings of the Rube Goldberg machine, rapid fire, in just over 1 minute and 40 seconds]


 * Adam: Pay close attention, 'cause here's exactly what's going to happen. At the top of this cone are ten bottles of cola. At a prescribed moment, Jamie will yank on this string, releasing a Mento into each of those ten bottles, which will then spray cola down into this funnel, down into this tube, up to this pair of wires, which will make an electrical contact, which will release this motor... [deep breath] ...sending this bowling ball spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning down. It'll stop, but the bowling ball will keep on spinning, release itself from the screw, fall down, hit all ten Santa bowling pins, which will yank on the string, send the skiers down. The skiers going down will yank on this magnet, which will release this soda bottle, sending the party favor going bup-bup-bup-bup-bup, going like this, boop, releasing this Mento, tick-a-tick-a-tick-a-tick-a, all the way down into the basket, releasing this Mento, tick-a-tick-a-tick-a-tick-a, all the way down into this basket. This ball will go down here, toonk, toonk, doonk, release the train, whoo-hoo, all the way around, all the way around into the present - boom! The present closes, releases a Mento into this bottle of soda, sending this robot, pushing the candle under the string, the candle will burn through the string, the string will release the hammer, hammer will... [smacks hands together] ...hit the stove. The stove, which has a roast in it, will release its roast onto this seesaw, onto the dinosaur platform, jiggling this thing, releasing the, uh, two little doodads here, which will send this seesaw going this way, releasing the ball into this robot, turning him on. This robot will find his way eventually to this hand, which will - boom! - turn this switch on, sending the Jacob's ladder... [makes electrical noises] ...like Frankenstein's monster. That will set off this fuse... [makes sizzling noises] ...boom! Setting the cannon off, the cannon will release the pirate's hat, the pirate's hat will turn on the monkeys. The monkeys will go down the ramp... [out of breath] ...releasing the nut from this nutcracker's mouth - which I just did - releasing another Mento into this bottle of soda, sending this thing spinning, pulling a string out which lets this foot kick the broken crutch here, sending Buster crashing into the ground. And that's what's gonna happen.
 * Rob Lee (US Narrator): Happen or not, you've just witnessed the longest piece to camera in MythBusters history.