Punchline (film)

Punchline is a 1988 American comedy film about a talented young comic who helps a housewife who wants to break into stand-up comedy.
 * Written and directed by David Seltzer.

Dying is easy. Comedy is hard.taglines

Steven Gold

 * We are all God's animated cartoons.
 * I've been coming down here for 18 months. 18 months! And I have not missed a night. I take the money that my father sends me and I pay for a shrink, and I buy groceries. Now I owe my shrink, and I'm behind in my rent. My roommate's a bastard - he's changed the locks in in my front door - I can't get in! He won't give me a key until I pay him. You wanna play games? I can play games! I can play games. I can play ventriloquist with my underwear. I can play darts while maintaining an erection. I can gargle dishwater and fart O Canada at the same time! I can play piano without being popular. I once had this dream - I was dancing on the streetcorner with a jackhammer up my ass - now that was either a sex dream or I need more fiber in my diet. If any of this is turning you on, just let me know.
 * If you're sending someone down, you better send him fast - 'cuz funny Steve's going under.
 * Don't be scared, 'cuz I'm funny Steve... with a lampshade on his head. Singing and dancing, for your entertainment, his own rendition of "Singin' in the Rain"!

Lilah Krytsick

 * Oh okay, so I'm not funny, SHOOT ME!


 * Hello, my name is Lilah Krytsick, and on our wedding night, my husband gave me something very long and hard... a new name.

Others

 * Stand-Up Comic: [doing an impression of Ghandi's mother] Please, sweetheart... just a sandwich?
 * Albert Emperato: You don't want carpet! You want an area rug!

Dialogue

 * John: $500! What the hell did you buy for $500?
 * Lilah: Jokes.

Taglines

 * Dying is easy. Comedy is hard.
 * It only hurts when you LAUGH!

Cast

 * Sally Field - Lilah Krytsick
 * Tom Hanks - Steven Gold
 * John Goodman - John Krytsick
 * Mark Rydell - Romeo
 * Kim Greist - Madeline Urie
 * Paul Mazursky - Arnold
 * Taylor Negron - Albert Emperato
 * Damon Wayans - Percy
 * Mac Robbins - Billy Lane