Purple Cow Parodies

Parodies of the poem "The Purple Cow" by Gelett Burgess.

By Carolyn Wells

 * A cow of purple is a joy forever. Its loveliness increases. I have never Seen this phenomenon.
 * "John Keats"


 * She lived unknown, that Cow, and so I never chanced to see; But if I had to be one, oh, The difference to me!
 * "William Wordsworth"


 * For the wind is in the gum-tree, And the hay is in the mow, And the cow-bells are a-calling "Come and see a Purple Cow!"
 * "Rudyard Kipling"


 * Hence, vain deluding cows. The herd of folly, without colour bright, How little you delight, Or fill the Poet's mind, or songs arouse!
 * "John Milton"


 * I dream of a purple creature Which is not as kine are now; And resembles cattle only As Cowper resembles a cow.
 * "Henry Wadsworth Longfellow"


 * Though cows of rare sorts I am buying, Not one breathes a balm to my breast. Oh, rapturous, rose-crowned occasion, When I such a glory might see! But a cow of a purple persuasion I never would be.
 * "Algernon Swinburne"


 * Our most hearty laughter Something sad must rouse. Our sweetest songs are those that tell of Purple Cows.
 * "Percy Bysshe Shelley"


 * Full many a cow of purplest ray serene Is haply grazing where I may not see; Full many a donkey writes of her, I ween, But neither of these creatures would I be.
 * "Thomas Gray"


 * Ask me no more. A cow I fain would see Of purple tint, like a sun-soaked grape -
 * "Alfred Tennyson"


 * Open then I flung a shutter, And, with many a flirt and flutter, In there stepped a Purple Cow which gayly tripped around my floor.
 * "Edgar Allan Poe"

By Oliver Herford

 * Corniferous wet-nurse of the human race, Calm, comfortable cow, with placid pride Yielding your offering at eventide
 * "Thomas Gray"

By Susan and David Hollander

 * And to my horror down the lane Came a sight; I froze inside A spectral cow with purple hide.
 * "Edgar Allan Poe"


 * In Bovine majesty she stands, Her purple tail she swings, The amethyst cow
 * "Emily Dickinson"