Slap Shot

Slap Shot is a 1977 film about a failing ice hockey team that finds success with outrageously violent hockey goonery.
 * Directed by George Roy Hill. Written by Nancy Dowd.

Slap Shot out slaps... out swears... out laughs... (taglines)

Reggie Dunlop

 * Jesus Christ, what a fuckin' nightmare.
 * I'd like to place a personal bounty on the head of Tim McCracken. He's the coach and chief punk on that Syracuse team.
 * [baiting the opposing goalie from behind the net] Hey, Hanrahan! Hanrahan!...Hey, Hanrahan! Suzanne sucks pussy!...Hey, Hanrahan, she's a dyke! I know! I know!...She's a lesbian! A lesbian! A lesbian!

The Hanson Brothers

 * Well Reg is our coach. Yeah, sure, Old Time Hockey! Like Eddie Shore. Eddie Shore, yeah. Coach... our line starts?
 * [to Ogie Ogilthorpe] Hi, Ogie!  Buy ya a soda after the game?
 * Hey ya think they show Speed Racer here?

Others

 * Ned Braden: You take the van, I'll keep the dog.
 * Jim Carr: I may be bald, but at least I'm not chicken-shit!
 * Denis Lemieux: [discussing hockey rules and customs, in broken English] Icing 'appen when dee puck come down... Bang! You know... before dee udder guy. Nobody dere. My h'arm go comme ça, den dee game stop den start h'up.
 * Denis Lemieux: My h'allergy to those fucking fans, you know, has returned.

Dialogue

 * Reggie Dunlop: How's it going, Nick?
 * Nick Brophy: I'm drunk.
 * Reggie Dunlop: Nah.
 * Nick Brophy: I'm not bullshittin' ya. Got stinkin' shit-faced on the bus, Louise left me, and that son of a bitch over there keeps playin' me, when he knows I'm shit-faced.
 * Reggie Dunlop: Geez, I'm really sorry.
 * Nick Brophy: Anybody throws me against the boards, I'm gonna piss all over myself.


 * Reggie Dunlop: What are you guys doing?
 * Steve Hanson: Puttin' on the foil!
 * Jeff Hanson: Every game!
 * Jack Hanson: Yeah, you want some?


 * [Following a pre-game brawl instigated by the Hanson brothers, during the National Anthem]
 * Referee: I got my eye on the three of you. You pull one thing, you're out of this game. I run a clean game here. I have any trouble here, I'll suspend you–
 * Steve Hanson: I'M LISTENING TO THE FUCKING SONG!


 * [After the Chiefs win on a forfeit after Reggie baited the opposing goalie into a fight, when the opponent had no other goalies available]
 * Mo Wanchuk: Hey, Reg! Reg! What did you say to him?
 * Reggie Dunlop: I told him his wife was a dyke.
 * Mo Wanchuk: NO!
 * Reggie Dunlop: Yeah!
 * Mo Wanchuk: Fuuuck!
 * Jim Mahern: Jesus Christ, no wonder he flipped his lid.
 * Johnny Upton: Anybody called my old lady a dyke, I'd go fucking bananas!
 * Reggie Dunlop: His wife is a dyke!


 * [Chiefs fashion show]
 * Jim Ahern: I look like some cock-sucking faggot in this thing.
 * Joe McGrath: Have you seen Reg or Braden?
 * Jim Ahern: Joe, I don't care man. Enough is enough. Nowhere in my contract does it say I gotta make a fool out of myself. Am I right?
 * [McGrath walks toward Upton]
 * Joe McGrath: Have you seen Dunlop or Braden–
 * Johnny Upton: I'm gonna flash 'em, Joe!
 * Joe McGrath: Aw, now, son...
 * Johnny Upton: I'm gonna walk down that stinkin' aisle, I'm gonna open up this faggot bathrobe and wiggle my dick at 'em!
 * Joe McGrath: You will not.
 * Johhny Upton: Yes I am, Joe, and you know why? Because I want you to have a heart attack and die so that we never have to do this shit again. You and your fucking fashion shows.
 * Joe McGrath: It's good publicity! You boys just haven't been bringing in the crowds like you used to.
 * Johnny Upton: I'm gonna wiggle it at 'em, you cheap bastard. I'm telling you, ya better be prepared, because when I yank it out, everybody in that audience with the exception of my wife is gonna be runnin' for the exits!
 * [Upton storms out]
 * Announcer: Ensemble #8, as we watch Chiefs defenseman, Johnny Upton, modelling #8...
 * Joe McGrath: [on the phone] Joe McGrath, just checking on Dunlop–
 * [The audience can be heard screaming at Upton, who apparently flashed the crowd; McGrath slowly hangs the phone up]


 *  Reggie Dunlop: You guys triplets or something?
 * Jack Hanson: Nah, I am in the middle... Steve's 20 and Jeff's 18.
 *  Reggie Dunlop: Where ya from?
 * Jack Hanson: Iron League.
 *  Reggie Dunlop: The Iron League, huh? Lotta fights?
 * Jack Hanson: Nah... Hey I want a a soda.
 *  Reggie Dunlop: We paid for you here for a week then you gotta find a room of your own.
 * Jack Hanson: Okay, coach. Gimme a grape or an orange and none of that stinkin' root beer.


 * [after meeting the Hansons]
 * Reggie Dunlop: You cheap son of a bitch. Are you crazy? Those guys are retards!
 * McGrath: I got a good deal on those boys. Scout said they showed a lot of promise.
 * Reggie Dunlop: They brought their fuckin' toys with 'em!
 * McGrath: I'd rather have them playing with their toys than playing with themselves.
 * Reggie Dunlop: They're too dumb to play with themselves! Boy, every piece of garbage that comes into the league, you gotta buy it.
 * McGrath: Reg... Reg, that reminds me, I was coaching in Omaha in 1948 and Eddie Shore sends me this guy who's a terrible masturbator. Couldn't control himself.  He would get deliberate penalities so he could get all by himself in the penalty box, and damned if he wouldn't, you know... [pantomimes masturbation]
 * Reggie Dunlop: [disgusted] Aw, Jesus, Joe...
 * McGrath: Now what was that again...? [continues masturbating gestures]


 * Reggie Dunlop: She underlines the fuck scenes for ya? Jesus, if she underlines the fuck scenes for ya, she must worship the ground you walk on.
 * Ned Braden: They teach you how to underline in college.
 * Reggie Dunlop: Not the fuck scenes, they don't. Braden, you gotta learn to put out more, you know what I mean?


 * Reggie Dunlop: You know, your son looks like a fag to me. You better get married again, 'cause he's gonna wind up with somebody's cock in his mouth before you can say "Jack Robinson".
 * Anita McCambridge: How dare you. How DARE you!


 * Johnny Upton: They're horrible looking.
 * Reggie Dunlop: Don't look at me; it was McGrath's doing, not mine.
 * Johnny Upton: What the old man trade for these assholes, a used puck bag? Watch Braden, he's gonna do something.
 * Ned Braden: Hi. Are you guys brothers?
 * Johnny Upton: Are you guys brothers... [laughs] What a life!


 * Tim McCracken: Dunlop, you suck cock.
 * Reggie Dunlop: All I can get.


 * Joe McGrath: You can't put a bounty on a man's head.
 * Reggie Dunlop:  I just did.


 * Reggie Dunlop: Let 'em know you're there!  Get that stick in their side, let 'em know you're there!  Put some lumber in their teeth, let 'em know you're there!
 * Ned Braden: [sarcastically] Bleed all over 'em, let 'em know you're there.


 * Reggie Dunlop: Lard ass Barkley Donaldson. You all saw what happened. Stick down, gloves off, he challenged the Chiefs. Called us names, CALLED US NAMES! But Dave was there.
 * The Hansons: [in unison] Dave's a killer!
 * Johnny Upton: Dave's a mess...
 * Reggie Dunlop: But Dave's out. Who's gonna take his place?
 * Ned Braden: Is the answer Jesus?
 * Reggie Dunlop: [glares at Braden] Okay, guys. [looks directly to the Hansons] Show us what you got!


 * [The Chiefs play normal, less raucous hockey in the championship game, only to get hammered in the first period ]
 *  Joe McGrath: They've come tonight.. to scout the Chiefs, the toughest team in the Federal League. Not this... bunch of... pussies. [stomps out of locker room]
 * Reggie Dunlop: Scouts?
 * [The Chiefs immediately return to their violent style of play]

Taglines

 * Slap Shot out slaps... out swears... out laughs...
 * you'll see Paul Newman doing things you'd never expect him to do... saying things you'd never expect him to say!
 * If this movie doesn't make you laugh, you better look up a psychiatric!!

Cast

 * Paul Newman – Reggie Dunlop (#7)
 * Strother Martin – Joe McGrath
 * Michael Ontkean – Ned Braden (#10)
 * Jennifer Warren – Francine Dunlop
 * Lindsay Crouse – Lily Braden
 * Jerry Houser – Dave "Killer" Carlson (#3)
 * Jeff Carlson – Jeff Hanson (#18)
 * Steve Carlson – Steve Hanson (#17)
 * David Hanson – Jack Hanson (#16)
 * Yvon Barrette – Denis Lemieux (#1)
 * Allan Nicholls – Johnny Upton (#12)
 * Brad Sullivan – Morris "Mo" Wanchuk (#2)


 * Stephen Mendillo – Jim Ahern (#6)
 * Yvan Ponton – Jean-Guy Drouin (#14)
 * Matthew Cowles – Charlie
 * Kathryn Walker – Anita McCambridge
 * Melinda Dillon – Suzanne Hanrahan
 * M. Emmet Walsh – Dickie Dunn
 * Swoosie Kurtz – Shirley Upton
 * Paul D'Amato – Tim "Dr. Hook" McCracken
 * Ronald L. Docken – Lebrun (#30)
 * Guido Tenesi – Billy Charlebois (#5)
 * Jean Rosario Tetreault – Bergeron (#8)


 * Christopher Murney – Tommy Hanrahan
 * Blake Ball – Gilmore Tuttle
 * Ned Dowd – Ogie Ogilthorpe
 * Andrew Duncan – Jim Carr
 * Nancy N. Dowd – Andrea
 * Barbara L. Shorts as Bluebird
 * Larry Block – Peterboro Referee
 * Paul Dooley – Hyannisport Announcer
 * Connie Madigan - Ross "Mad Dog" Madison
 * Ross Smith – Barclay Donaldson
 * Joe Nolan – Clarence "Screaming Buffalo" Swamptown