Talk:Leo Buscaglia

I have seen the poem beginning:

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.

attributed to a raft of different authors (including Leo Buscaglia, Ralph Waldo Emerson, "A Chicago teacher", Janet Rand). Can we get a reliable source to prove this is (or isn't) Leo Buscaglia please? I strongly suspect it was originally by Janet Rand, but quoted heavily by Buscaglia to the point where people assumed he'd penned it.

Source 1 and Source 2 - Search for "Janet Rand"

I couldn't find much else about Janet Rand, but I did notice this page:

Declarations of pseudonyms

which lists Janet Rand as a pseudonym for "Louise L Wilson". CSS-Prince 11:53, 16 April 2006 (UTC)

While a Leo Buscaglia tribute website attributes the quote to Janet Rand who "stepped forward" as the author. http://members.aol.com/shyguycpa/buscaglia.htm  And Janet Rand is credited by  Jeanne Sharbuno in her use of the quote in "52 ways to live Success." I have most often found the quote attributed to William Arthur Ward (1921-1994) US college administrator. ( Texas Wesleyan College )who was a pithy writer of many maxims including: "The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails." This quote of William A. Ward is often found tacked on to the end of the "To Risk" piece.

Unsourced
Wikiquote no longer allows unsourced or inadequately sourced quotations, and they are in process of being removed from our pages (see Wikiquote:Limits on quotations); but if you can provide a reliable, precise and verifiable source for any quote on this list please move it to Leo Buscaglia. --Antiquary 19:03, 30 April 2009 (UTC)
 * The greatest risk is risking nothing at all.


 * A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be himself — to laugh with me, but never at me; to cry with me, but never because of me; to love life, to love himself, to love being loved. Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart.


 * A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my world.


 * A wonderful realization will be the day you realize that you are unique in all the world. There is nothing that is an accident. You are a special combination for a purpose — and don't let them tell you otherwise, even if they tell you that 'purpose is an illusion.' (Live an illusion if you have to). You are that combination so that you can do what is essential for you to do. Don't ever believe that you have nothing to contribute. The world is an incredible unfulfilled tapestry. And only you can fulfill that tiny space that is yours.


 * A lot of people don't want to talk about love and feelings and I'm always going around saying, "Hey, let's talk about love!" I don't care. And if you think I'm crazy, that's wonderful, because when you think I'm crazy, that gives me lots of leeway for behavior.


 * Ancient Egyptians believed that upon death they would be asked two questions and their answers would determine whether they could continue their journey in the afterlife. The first question was, "Did you bring joy?" The second was, "Did you find joy?"


 * Change is the end result of all true learning.


 * Change. It has the power to uplift, to heal, to stimulate, surprise, open new doors, bring fresh experience and create excitement in life. Certainly it is worth the risk.


 * Death is a challenge. It tells us not to waste time... It tells us to tell each other right now that we love each other.


 * Don't brood. Get on with living and loving. You don't have forever.


 * Don't hold to anger, hurt or pain. They steal your energy and keep you from love.


 * Don't smother each other. No one can grow in the shade.


 * Don't spend your precious time asking "Why isn't the world a better place?" It will only be time wasted. The question to ask is "How can I make it better?" To that there is an answer.


 * Everyone needs a hug. It changes your metabolism.


 * Find the person who will love you because of your differences and not in spite of them and you have found a lover for life.


 * Happiness and love are just a choice away.


 * I believe that you control your destiny, that you can be what you want to be. You can also stop and say, No, I won't do it, I won't behave his way anymore. I'm lonely and I need people around me, maybe I have to change my methods of behaving and then you do it.


 * I have a very strong feeling that the opposite of love is not hate - it's apathy. It's not giving a damn.


 * I still get wildly enthusiastic about little things... I play with leaves. I skip down the street and run against the wind.


 * I've always thought that people need to feel good about themselves and I see my role as offering support to them, to provide some light along the way.


 * I see people who are always saying, "I'm a lover, I'm a lover, I'm a lover. I really believe in love. I act the part." And then they will shout at the waitress, Where's the water?!" I will believe your love when you show it to me in action. When you can understand that everybody is teaching everybody to love at every moment.


 * I will leave you with this one thought. You know, I am really convinced that if you were to define love, the only word big enough to engulf it all would be "life." Love is life in all aspects. And if you miss love, you miss life. Please don't.


 * If I don't have wisdom, I can teach you only ignorance.


 * If we wish to free ourselves from enslavement, we must choose freedom and the responsibility this entails.


 * It is difficult for some people to accept that love is a choice. This seems to run counter to the generally accepted theory of romantic love which expounds that love is inborn and as such requires no more than to accept it.


 * It is paradoxical that many educators and parents still differentiate between a time for learning and a time for play without seeing the vital connection between them.


 * Life is our greatest possession and love its greatest affirmation.


 * Life is uncharted territory. It reveals its story one moment at a time.


 * Life lived for tomorrow will always be just a day away from being realized.


 * Like any other living, growing thing, love requires effort to keep it healthy.


 * Love is always bestowed as a gift — freely, willingly and without expectation. We don't love to be loved; we love to love.


 * Love is always changing and unless we stay aware and change with it, it eludes us.


 * Love is always open arms. If you close your arms about love you will find that you are left holding only yourself.


 * Love is not some complex, mystical abstraction. It is something accessible and human that we learn through our everyday experience, as often at times of failure as in moments of ecstasy.


 * Love withers with predictability; its very essence is surprise and amazement. To make love a prisoner of the mundane is to take its passion and lose it forever.


 * Man has no choice but to love. For when he does not, he find his alternative lie in loneliness, destruction and despair.


 * Most of us are pawns in a game of love we don't understand.


 * Never idealize others. They will never live up to your expectations. Don't over-analyse your relationships. Stop playing games. A growing relationship can only be nurtured by genuineness.
 * From Buscaglia's Loving Each Other: The Challenge of Human Relationships, where he is passing on advice suggested by an anonymous survey-taker. --Hughh (talk) 20:02, 16 January 2017 (UTC)


 * Only the weak are cruel. Gentleness can only be expected from the strong.


 * Only when we give joyfully, without hesitation or thought of gain, can we truly know what love means.


 * Our talents are the gift that God gives to us... What we make of our talents is our gift back to God.
 * Variant: Your talent is God's gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God.
 * Relish love in your old age! Aged love is like aged wine; it becomes more satisfying, more refreshing, more valuable, more appreciated and more intoxicating!


 * The fact that I can plant a seed and it becomes a flower, share a bit of knowledge and it becomes another's, smile at someone and receive a smile in return, are to me continual spiritual exercises.


 * The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live.


 * There are two big forces at work, external and internal. We have very little control over external forces such as tornadoes, earthquakes, floods, disasters, illness and pain. What really matters is the internal force. How do I respond to those disasters?


 * There is seemingly so little love shared in this world, it is not surprising that we ask, "Where have all the lovers gone?" Since love is the most vital energy for good that is within our power to utilize, it is puzzling why we so seldom do so. Love is just a useless, abstract idea until we put it into action... Unless we are always actively living in love, we are not utilizing the greatest gift we have been given and which we, in turn, have to offer.


 * Things omitted are often more deadly than errors committed.


 * Time has no meaning in itself unless we choose to give it significance.


 * To live in love is life's greatest challenge.


 * To live in love is to live in life, and to live in life is to live in love.


 * When it comes to giving love, the opportunities are unlimited, and we are all gifted.


 * We all need each other.


 * We are all born with God-given, unique traits and skills. But as with all possibilities they will remain unrealized unless they are developed, nurtured and put into practice.


 * We are no longer puppets being manipulated by outside powerful forces: we become the powerful force ourselves.


 * We seem to gain wisdom more readily through our failures than through our successes. We always think of failure as the antithesis of success, but it isn't. Success often lies just the other side of failure.


 * What love we've given, we'll have forever. What love we fail to give, will be lost for all eternity.


 * What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life.


 * What we need to know about loving is no great mystery. We all know what constitutes loving behavior; we need but act upon it, not continually question it. Over-analysis often confuses the issue and in the end brings us no closer to insight. We sometimes become too busy classifying, separating, and examining, to remember that love is easy. It's we who make it complicated.


 * Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.

"To laugh is to risk appearing the fool. To weep is to risk being called sentimental. To reach out to another is to risk involvement. To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self. To place your ideas, your dreams before the crowd is to risk being called naive. To love is to risk not being loved in return. To live is to risk dying. To hope is to risk despair, and to try is to risk failure. But risks must be taken because the greastest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live. Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave, he's forfeited his freedom. Only the person who risks is truly free." is a quote from William Arthur Ward, NOT Leo Buscaglia

Can you destroy love?
In all of his teachings that I have read, I never heard Dr. Buscaglia directly address this question? Can you destroy love? I believe you can, because I know I have done it at least once!