Talk:Marriage

Merged from Wives: * (cur) (last) 21:49, 6 August 2005 Thomas (+de) * (cur) (last) 13:02, 30 July 2005 Aphaia * (cur) (last) 13:06, 25 July 2005 MosheZadka m (cat) * (cur) (last) 01:07, 18 April 2005 69.199.220.88 * (cur) (last) 00:37, 13 April 2005 24.13.38.211 * (cur) (last) 20:17, 24 February 2005 12.9.186.2 ~ MosheZadka (Talk) 02:14, 21 August 2005 (UTC)

Why are all the quotes so negative ?
I am looking for good positive quotes to put on my wedding dinner presentation slides. I found the quotes all so negative ? . Can someone please post some good ones? I will post some later --Andrewkeith80 09:50, 20 February 2007 (UTC)

Whoever finds a wife finds a good thing (Holy Bible)-Davis Ochieng

Yeah i know that's whati was thinking too. I really liked this one:

If you marry for love and not for money, then you'll have warm nights and cold days. - Unsourced --69.229.108.100 08:23, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

I can't verify the sources... so I add it here....
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Guitry

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. Dumas

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want? Sigmund Freud

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. Anonymous

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays." Henny Youngman

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years." Sam Kinison

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." James Holt McGavran

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't." Patrick Murray

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. Nash

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... Anonymous

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. Henny Youngman

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. Milton Berle

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. Anonymous

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

--88.249.208.188 20:27, 5 November 2007 (UTC)

Marriage is like a game of cards. You begin with two hearts and a diamond, but soon you wish you had a club and a spade. Anonymous

64.231.122.228 02:43, 26 April 2013 (UTC)

Unsourced

 * Marriage is socialism between two people.
 * Barbara Ehrenreich


 * Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight.
 * Georg C. Lichtenberg


 * Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy.
 * Huey P. Long


 * Marrying is all about just obtaining a piece of paper. Divorcing is just obtaining another.
 * Celeste Tan


 * An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
 * Agatha Christie (denied by her)


 * He's a wonderful first husband.
 * James Goldsmith, on his daughter Jemima's marriage to Imran Khan


 * I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck.
 * W. C. Fields


 * I first learned the concepts of non-violence in my marriage.
 * Mohandas Gandhi


 * I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
 * Groucho Marx


 * Garth, marriage is a punishment for shoplifting in some countries.
 * Mike Myers (As Wayne Campbell)


 * Marriage is a wonderful invention; but then again, so is a bicycle puncture repair kit.
 * Billy Connolly


 * Marriage makes an end of many short follies - being one long stupidity.
 * Friedrich Nietzsche


 * Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings...and lawyers.
 * Richard Pryor


 * Marriage is a wonderful institution ... but who wants to live in an institution?
 * Groucho Marx


 * Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
 * Groucho Marx


 * No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.
 * Honore de Balzac


 * On rare occasions one does hear of a miraculous case of a married couple falling in love after marriage, but on close examination it will be found that it is a mere adjustment to the inevitable.
 * Emma Goldman


 * Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
 * Henny Youngman


 * The concept of marriage must have been thought up by an unimaginative pig.
 * Albert Einstein


 * There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again.
 * Clint Eastwood


 * The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
 * Henny Youngman


 * Thus Dante's motto over Inferno applies with equal force to marriage: "Ye who enter here leave all hope behind."
 * Emma Goldman


 * You only know what happiness is once you're married. But then it's too late.
 * Peter Sellers


 * Any marriage where the bride is allowed to speak and wear clothes is doomed to failure.
 * Quark (Star Trek: DS9)


 * Worf: "Before the wedding we must endure 5 tests. Blood, pain, sacrifice, suffering and finally, death." ''"Sounds like marriage all right."
 * Star Trek DS9 (You are cordially invited...)''


 * Now non-Indian people think they know all about arranged marriages. 'So I hear that when you're born, the first thing your parents do is chose a nice girl for you to marry when you're old enough.' 'No, No! It doesn't work like that. Arranged marriages are more like going to a car show. Your dad lets you look at, and compare all the cars. 'Oh that one is nice. You would like that one, you like it? Ya, you are going to get that one.' - 'Don't I get to test drive it?' - 'No, not now, wait until you are married, then you can test drive it all you want.
 * Russell Peters


 * Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
 * Oscar Wilde


 * Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
 * Oscar Wilde


 * How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.
 * Oscar Wilde


 * The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.
 * Oscar Wilde


 * The proper basis for a marriage is mutual misunderstanding.
 * Oscar Wilde


 * No one can consider themselves truly married until they understand every word their spouse is not saying.
 * Lord Mancroft


 * Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.
 * Lewis Grizzard, quoted in Readers Digest


 * Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
 * Mae West


 * A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he is finished.
 * Zsa Zsa Gabor


 * No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not.
 * H L Mencken


 * Let him go let him tarry, Let him sink or let him swim; If he doesn't care for me then I don't care for him. For I'm going to marry a far nicer boy.
 * Old English West Country rhyme