Talk:Shannon Sharpe

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 * WR Plaxico Burress: "Plexiglas"
 * WR Chad Ochocinco: "ocho no-show" instead of "ocho cinco"
 * WR Freddie Mitchell: "If I had his hands, I'd cut 'em off"
 * RB Corey Dillon, "the biggest robbery since the Louisiana Purchase" (Subway Postgame Show, 2005-01-16, AFC divisional game)
 * QB Jake Plummer: "They're about to take out the 'SN' in Snake and put an 'F' in front of it." (from Movin' the Chains)
 * QB Kyle Boller: "I've got a better chance of winning the Kentucky Derby on the back of a donkey than they have of winning the Super Bowl with Kyle Boller."
 * Head Coach Tom Coughlin: "I would rather die in an abandoned building alone, and my family not know what happened, than play for Coughlin."
 * LB London Fletcher-Baker: "LondonFletcher-Baker.com; he's logged in."
 * Jacksonville Jaguars' strategy in a divisional playoff game against the New England Patriots: "Nothing cheap, nothing deep." (January 12, 2008)
 * CB Ray Buchanan, who wore a dog collar to Media Day and guaranteed an Atlanta victory in Super Bowl XXXIII (which Atlanta lost): "Had anybody heard of Ray Buchanan before he got to Atlanta?"
 * After Buchanan's assertion that Sharpe looked like a horse: "I've never called anybody ugly. Do I think people are ugly? Yeah, I think he's ugly, but I've never said that...Is he my friend? No. Did I ever view him as a friend? No. Do I view him as an acquaintance? No. Do I like him? No. If I see him in a snowstorm, his truck is broke down, mine is going perfectly, would I pick him up? No."
 * QB Steve DeBerg: "DeBerg is old enough to be my father, and he's still in the league. How old is DeBerg, 105?"
 * TE O.J. Santiago: "Santiago? Who, Benito?"
 * FS Eugene Robinson: "He can't out-talk me or cover me. He went to Colgate, but I'm smarter than he is. I might bump into him. I know he's not going to be covering me one-on-one. We know that's not going to happen, don't we?"
 * QB Joe Flacco: "I call him Stock Market Joe, because he's up and down. But, today, his stock has never been higher."
 * About the four people he'd invite to a dinner party: "Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, Michael Jordan and Halle Berry. I'd talk to Gates, Buffett and Jordan first, and then me and Halle would go get another table in the back that's candlelit. And I'd let them discuss whatever they want to discuss."
 * "I won't talk about someone's mother. I won't talk about their girlfriend or their wife, but if you have a deformity, I would talk about that."
 * About growing up in Georgia and hating the Atlanta Falcons: "I've pretty much been in Atlanta my whole life, and I never liked the Falcons. What was there to like about them? They lost all the time. If you had a pair of cleats on and you were in Fulton County, they'd put you in the ballgame, they were so bad. For $20, you could sit in the luxury box with the owner."
 * About the Indianapolis Colts Defense winning the Super Bowl: "I have a better chance of hitting a home run grand slam in Yankee's Stadium with a toothpick."
 * On Chicago Bears QB Rex Grossman's first-half performance in Super Bowl XLI: "Rex Grossman is exactly who I thought he was...inconsistent!" This was a spoof of then-Arizona Cardinals coach Dennis Green, who had famously growled, "The Bears are who we thought they were!" following Arizona's infamous Monday Night Football 2006 loss to the Bears earlier that season.
 * On New England Patriots strategy after a Deltha O'Neal punt-return touchdown during a 30-26 Patriots win over Sharpe's Broncos on Monday Night Football on November 3, 2003: "They can't run the ball! All they're gonna do is play-action, they can't run the ball."