Talk:Tobacco

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 * He who doth not smoke hath either known no great griefs, or refuseth himself the softest consolation, next to that which comes from heaven. :Edward George Bulwer-Lytton


 * Gentlemen, you may smoke.
 * [ending the long ban on smoking held by Queen Victoria in the early 20th Century]
 * King Edward VII


 * I'll smoke anything anybody gives me, I'm not particular.
 * Peter Falk


 * [Tobacco] is the passion of honest men and he who lives without tobacco is not worthy of living.
 * Moliere (Jean Baptiste Poquelin).


 * If smoking is not allowed in heaven, I shall not go.
 * Mark Twain


 * It has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake.
 * Mark Twain


 * It's easy to quit smoking. I've done it hundreds of times.
 * Mark Twain


 * I'm not really a heavy smoker any more. I only get through two lighters a day now.
 * Bill Hicks


 * Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.
 * Florence King


 * Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast.
 * Woody Allen


 * Looking back now, I have come to realize that she was my nicotine.
 * Tipper Boharic


 * My own experience has been that the tools I need for my trade are paper, tobacco, food, and a little whisky.
 * William Faulkner


 * Tobacco and alcohol, delicious fathers of abiding friendships and fertile reveries.
 * Luis Buñuel


 * The only way to break a bad habit was to replace it with a better habit.
 * Jack Nicholson, explaining why he switched from cigarettes to cigars.


 * Nobody has died because of not smoking, but why take a chance?
 * Satish Chothani


 * Non-smokers...die every day. Sleep tight!
 * Bill Hicks


 * Anti :


 * My smoking might be bothering you, but it's killing me.
 * Colette


 * Variation People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them... Well, it's killing me!
 * Wendy Liebman


 * Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar.
 * Steve Allen


 * When I heard smoking will kill you I bought shares in Marlboro and Dunhill.
 * Thomas Geraghty


 * A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
 * Groucho Marx


 * Ah, if only I had brought a cigar with me! This would have established my identity.
 * Charles Dickens


 * Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.
 * Mark Twain


 * Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.
 * Groucho Marx


 * I drink a great deal. I sleep a little, and I smoke cigar after cigar. That is why I am in two-hundred-percent form.
 * Winston Churchill


 * I have made it a rule never to smoke more that one cigar at a time.
 * Variation: I smoke in moderation. Only one cigar at a time.
 * Mark Twain


 * I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
 * George Burns


 * If I paid ten dollars for a cigar, first I'd make love to it, then I'd smoke it.
 * George Burns


 * If I had taken my doctor's advice and quit smoking when he advised me to, I wouldn't have lived to go to his funeral.
 * 98 year old George Burns


 * Cigars are like new life in a twisted world
 * James Francesco


 * Of course, I started as a collector. A true collector. I can remember as if it were only yesterday the heart- pounding excitement as I spread out upon the floor of my bedroom The Edward G. Robinson Collection of Rare Cigar Bands. I didn't play at collecting. No cigar anywhere was safe from me.
 * Edward G. Robinson


 * Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
 * Sigmund Freud


 * There are men here and there to whom the whole of life is like an after-dinner hour with a cigar; easy, pleasant, empty, perhaps enlivened by some fable of strife to be forgotten - before the end is told - even if there happens to be any end to it.
 * Joseph Conrad


 * There is nothing more agreeable than having a place where one can throw on the floor as many cigar butts as one pleases without the subconscious fear of a maid who is waiting like a sentinel to place an ashtray where the ashes are going to fall.
 * Fidel Castro


 * What this country needs is a good five-cent cigar!
 * Thomas Marshall, Vice-president of Woodrow Wilson


 * Cigar smoking is a hobby, not a habit.
 * Art Fuente


 * A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied.  What more can one want?  :Oscar Wilde


 * A cigarette is the only consumer product which when used as directed kills its consumer.
 * Dr. Gro Harlem Brundtland


 * For the first time in history, sex is more dangerous than the cigarette afterward.
 * Jay Leno


 * I tried to stop smoking cigarettes by telling myself I just didn't want to smoke, but I didn't believe myself.
 * Barbara Kelly


 * To some, the cigarette is a portable therapist.
 * Terri Guillemets


 * The only "safer" cigarette is your last one.
 * Duane Alan Hahn


 * There's something luxurious about having a girl light your cigarette. In fact, I got married once on account of that.
 * Harold Robbins


 * I believe that pipe smoking contributes to a somewhat calm and objective judgment in all human affairs.
 * Albert Einstein


 * If you can't send money, send tobacco.
 * George Washington to the Continental Congress, 1776.


 * Man, the creature who knows he must die, who has dreams larger than his destiny, who is forever working a confidence trick on himself, needs an ally. Mine has been tobacco.
 * John Boynton Priestley


 * Pipe-smokers spend so much time cleaning, filling and fooling with their pipes, they don't have time to get into mischief.
 * Bill Vaughan


 * The believing we do something when we do nothing is the first illusion of tobacco.
 * Ralph Waldo Emerson