The Absent-Minded Professor

The Absent-Minded Professor is a 1961 black-and-white Walt Disney Productions film based on the short story A Situation of Gravity.
 * ''Directed by Robert Stevenson. Written by Samuel W. Taylor and Bill Walsh.

Professor Ned Brainard

 * Let's see, flying rubber... Flubber!
 * Corners beautifully, doesn't it?
 * I'm an American! See it? My credit cards!
 * Substance X, we dub thee... Flubber!
 * Mr. Hawk, let me get this straight. You want me to turn my discovery over to you so you can blackmail our government?

Others

 * First Referee: There's nothing in the rule book that says one team can't jump higher than the other.
 * Biff Hawk: Oh, it's just Neddy the Nut out flying his old Model T.

Dialogue

 * [The fire crew has arrived to rescue Alonzo Hawk, who is now bouncing out of control.]
 * Fire Chief: [shouting through a megaphone] Mr. Hawk! This is the Fire Chief speaking! We'll have everything under control in just a moment. Now Mr. Hawk, try to relax.
 * Alonzo J. Hawk: Relax? How can I relax, you fat-head?


 * [The fire crew's net has been accidentally broken by Alonzo Hawk during their attempt to rescue him.]
 * Fireman: I told you we needed a new one.
 * Fire Chief: You told me? What do you think I've been telling the town council? How am I supposed to buy a new net without an appropriation?
 * Fireman: Well, don't get hot. I only mentioned it.
 * Fire Chief: Well, you just keep the kinks out of the fire hose. That's all I want from you. I'm the Chief!


 * [Prof. Brainard has repeatedly slammed his "Flubberized" Model T down of Prof. Ashton's car roof while in motion, causing to go out of control and crash into a police car.]
 * Prof. Shelby Ashton: [as he and the two officers get out of their crashed cars] Officer! Help me! It's after me! Help me!
 * Officer Hanson: I do hope that you will excuse my appearance, but I was just having a cup of boiling hot coffee.
 * Prof. Shelby Ashton: But it's after me!
 * Officer Hanson: What's after you?
 * Prof. Shelby Ashton: I don't know, some kind of a... thing!
 * Officer Hanson: A thing? Can you describe it?
 * Prof. Shelby Ashton: I don't know. I didn't see it. But it flies. And it made a noise, like, uh, "Aaa-OOO-gah! Aaa-OOO-gah!" And then it banged down on the top of my car! BOOM, BOOM, BOOM! And when I looked, there wasn't anything there.
 * Officer Hanson: Oh, that kind of a thing.

Cast

 * Fred MacMurray - Professor Ned Brainard
 * Nancy Olson - Betsy Carlisle
 * Keenan Wynn - Alonzo P. Hawk
 * Tommy Kirk - Biff Hawk
 * Leon Ames - President Jeffrey Daggett
 * Elliott Reid - Professor Shelby Ashton
 * Edward Andrews - Defense Secretary
 * David Lewis - General Singer
 * Jack Mullaney - Air Force Captain
 * Belle Montrose - Mrs. Chatsworth
 * Wally Brown - Coach Elkins
 * Wally Boag - TV Newsman
 * Don Ross - Lenny
 * Forrest Lewis - Officer Kelley
 * James Westerfield - Officer Hanson
 * Gage Clarke - Reverend Bosworth
 * Alan Hewitt - General Hotchkiss
 * Raymond Bailey - Admirial Olmstead
 * Ed Wynn - Fire Chief