The Dream Team (film)

The Dream Team is a 1989 comedy film directed by Howard Zieff and produced by Christopher W. Knight for Imagine Entertainment and Universal Pictures. Jon Connolly and David Loucka wrote the screenplay.

Dialogue

 * [Jack McDermott sits nude in his room and drinks red wine]
 * Jack McDermott: This is the body and blood of our savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. And a damned fine Beaujolais!


 * Billy: Ah, it's great to be young and insane!


 * Giant Chicken: Leiter's unbelievable. The man could throw a lamb chop passed the goddamn wolf.


 * Billy: You see those two towers? World Trade Center. I was an architect working on them. First they just wanted to build one but I said, "Fellas, we're here. What the hell, throw the other one up." Turned out pretty well, didn't it?
 * Henry: Fantasy.


 * [some patrons are harassing a waitress]
 * Billy: You guys need to pay up and get out of here.
 * Drunk: Who the hell are you?
 * [Billy grabs the drunk by the hair and slams his face on the table]
 * Billy: I'm an escaped mental patient with a history of violence.


 * Billy: Yeah, I got a big story for ya; we came to town to see a ball game, and now they wanna give us the chair. I love New York. Bring your kids. Have 'em arrested. Do some time in The Big Apple.


 * Jack McDermott: I don't want him next to me. He smells like tuna fish.


 * Billy: Restaurant security. Just a minor utensil violation. Go ahead, enjoy your dinner.


 * Dr. Weitzman: There's about 65,000 seats up at that stadium. But I don't want you to get your hopes up, because they're all screwed down.


 * Jack McDermott: I am the Lord they God. Thou shalt not have strange gods before me. Out of my way, asshole.


 * [their van is being towed]
 * Jack McDermott: Stop! Who dares to tow the van of the living Christ?
 * Driver: The city of New York, Tarzan! $50 for the violation, $75 for the tow and $20 a day for storage.
 * Jack McDermott: [skyward] Father, forgive us for we have sinned! We parked our car in a forbidden zone!


 * Sergeant Vincenté: You know what? You got the whole think back-ass-wards, I think you're the missing persons. Just go to 48th street and wait. The guy doesn't show, we're open 24 hours. [answers phone] Hello, Vincenté.
 * Billy: We're not done!
 * Sergeant Vincenté: You're done, it's been a pleasure.
 * Billy: Hey, we used to be tax payers!
 * Sergeant Vincenté: Now that will get my attention. You're not out of here in 30 seconds, you got a night in jail!
 * Billy: What kind of bonehead cop would send four confessed mental patients back out in the streets?


 * Billy: Where the hell did you go to take that piss? Moscow?


 * Henry: I'm the doctor until the doctor comes back!
 * Billy: Okay, you be the doctor and I'll be the escaped mental patient, okay?
 * [kicks the van and walks off]

Cast

 * Michael Keaton as Billy Caufield
 * Christopher Lloyd as Henry Sikorsky
 * Peter Boyle as Jack McDermott
 * Stephen Furst as Albert Ianuzzi
 * Dennis Boutsikaris as Dr. Jeff Weitzman
 * Lorraine Bracco as Riley
 * Milo O'Shea as Dr. Newald
 * Philip Bosco as O'Malley
 * James Remar as Gianelli
 * Michael Lembeck as Ed, Riley's ex-boyfriend
 * Jack Duffy as Bernie
 * Larry Pine as Canning
 * Ted Simonett as a yuppie
 * John Stocker as Murray
 * Lizbeth MacKay as Henry's wife
 * Olivia Horton as Henry's daughter
 * Ron James as Dwight
 * Freda Foh Shen as a TV newscaster
 * Dennis Parlato as TV newscaster
 * Donna Hanover as a field reporter
 * Jihmi Kennedy as the tow truck driver
 * Guglielmo Goffi as opening scene accordion musician