The Hills (TV series)

The Hills is an American reality television series that originally aired on MTV from May 31, 2006, until July 13, 2010. Developed as a spin-off of Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County, the series aired six seasons and focused on the personal and professional lives of several young women residing in Los Angeles, California. Its premise was conceived by Adam DiVello, while Liz Gateley and Sean Travis served as executive producers.

Season 1

 * Susan Aronson (Director of Admissions, FIDM): How would you characterize yourself as a high school student?
 * Heidi: I never did learn anything, I never went to school, I never did anything, I just went shopping and hung out.


 * Lauren: Did you ever see that Seinfeld episode where that bald guy’s fiance licked all of the envelopes and she like died from glue poisoning?
 * Whitney: No!
 * Lauren: And there were only 300 of those.

A Change Of Plans [1.2]

 * Heidi: And their office is gorgeous. Like inside they have brick walls and this awesome paintings, and I get like a lunch break and stuff.


 * Lauren: (singing) Fashion school dropout. No graduation day for you. Fashion school dropout.

An Unexpected Call [1.3]

 * Laure:You know you are going to have to work, though.


 * Lauren: How was your first day? (of work)
 * Heidi: Well, it’s not what I thought it was going to be. Now they’re saying it’s full time 9-6. It’s so boring! I’m stuffing envelopes. This was my nightmare of a job.
 * Lauren: You’ve got to give it more than one day.

Lauren And Jason, Take Two [1.4]

 * Lauren: How do you get rid of hiccups?
 * Heidi: Drink water upside down and put a pencil in your mouth.
 * Lauren: Is that possible?
 * Lauren: My Dad always told me ‘Flowers mean I’m sorry, chocolates mean I love you.


 * Whitney: Sometimes there are just some people you just never get over.

Jason's Birthday [1.5]

 * Lauren:It sounds kind of golf.


 * Whitney: Jeans can be really addicting. There’s always new ones and you feel like you have to have them. I can’t do it.

Boyfriends And Work Don't Mix [1.6]

 * Lauren: Just make the best of it.


 * Elodie: Okay, Miss ‘I-have-a-really-big-personal-schedule.

Somebody Always Has To Cry [1.7]

 * Heidi:You know you’re growing up when you want stuff for your apartment. Instead of like toys and clothes. I’m not there yet.


 * Lauren: Heidi, it looks like you may be my New Year’s kiss. ‘Cause we have 12 minutes and I will have a New Year’s kiss.

You Can't Just Be With Me? [1.8]

 * Whitney: Guys, I’m glad I’m skipping school for this day.
 * Heidi: I love ditching. It’s like a thing I love.
 * Lauren: She loves ditching so much, she permantly ditched school.
 * Heidi: I did.


 * Male Model: Where’s the party at tonight?
 * Whitney: Um, I don’t know. Where’s your party at tonight?
 * Male: I’m gonna be all over.

Love Is Not A Maybe Thing [1.9]

 * Heid:I feel like it’s all on the verge of a turning point but I don’t know exactly what it’s going to be.


 * Lauren: Love is not a maybe thing; You know when you love someone.

You Know What You Did [3.1]

 * Lauren: I just could never understand hating someone so much that you would want to do something like that to me.


 * Jen “Bunny”: I’m totally focused on my real friendships right now and like you’re a very important person to me. I’m just really glad that I’m here and we’re talking.
 * Heidi: I’m glad that you’re part of my fresh start. I’m glad that you’re here to really be a part of this because you mean so much to me.
 * Jen: Did you invite Lauren?
 * Heidi: I did. I just wish she were here to see how much fun this is.


 * Audrina: Heidi knows exactly what she did. She acted stupid like ‘What did I do? Why did she get so mad at me?’ We’ve heard all the s*** you guys have been talking about Lauren. You know what you did. Go talk to her.

Big Girls Don't Cry [3.2]

 * Spencer: You’re brainwashed, that’s why.
 * Heidi: Ooo, master, what should I order for lunch. No, I just don’t even know what her problem is. And Audria, oh my God, this is between me and Lauren, you can go back to whatever you were doing lil lady.  *** We still need get all the stuff for the apartment and start really moving in.  Maybe I’ll pick out some paint colors for the walls.
 * Spencer: Whatever.
 * Heidi: Like a light yellow.
 * Spencer: Light yellow? EHHHH!


 * Spencer: I definitely want you to be my best man.
 * Brody Jenner: Best man? For what?
 * Spencer: Dude, I’m probably going to pop the question tomorrow at my beach house.
 * Brody: What? Dude? Are you talking about getting married? (pause) You can’t even say it with a straight face. Look at that little smirk.
 * Spencer: That’s ‘cuse it’s not getting married, it’s getting engaged. The st step to marriage.
 * Brody: Homey, you’ve been dating Heidi for one year. Why don’t you wait at least two or three or four or five
 * Spencer: But I mean this has been the best year of my entire life
 * Brody: Just because all of a sudden you get into a relationship where it’s great, that doesn’t mean you need to get married.
 * Spencer: Not great. Flawlessly perfect.
 * Brody: Okay, okay but do you know what I mean?
 * Spencer: I can totally…
 * Brody: Get your hopes up
 * Spencer: It’s not about hopes, I would go marry her in f****** Vegas right now.
 * Brody: You don’t have to get married right now Spencer, you’re 23 years old.
 * Spencer: Turning 24 player.
 * Brody: Oh but it’s like homey, get married at like 30, 35, it’s like wait, you gotta live your youth, you wan to really waste your whole youth?
 * Spencer: By the way, did you bring your credit card, I think I’m going need to borrow that, $100, 000.
 * Brody: You ain’t using my credit card, fool. This is your ring. I’m not stupid enough to get married at 23. You are.

Truth and Time Tells All [1.3]

 * Spencer: Okay, in all seriousness. You’re pretty much the most amazing human I’ve met in my whole life. And it’s so real and every single day I’m with you, I’m really happy everyday and it’s so real that eveytime I wake up next to you I’m just like ‘Ah, you’re there, yea You’re still there.’ I want to spend the rest of my life with you so I got this for you.
 * Heidi: I love you.
 * Spencer: I love you more, I really do.
 * Heidi: I don’t think so.
 * Spencer: I don’t even know what hand a wedding ring goes on.
 * Heidi: I don’t know I just I love you more than anything. When people told me don’t be with him, I was like you obviously don’t know him because he’s the most amazing guy I’ve ever met in my life. I never had a relatinoship like this; it’s so fun, it’s so everything and you’re always there and I know for my whole life that you’ll always be there. And I know that you’re the most loyal, amazing, loving everything person and I love you more than anything in the whole world.


 * Brody:You said you’ve been a bacholor for 23 years, that’s good because you’re about to get married, you won’t have an sex. I know married couples, they don’t have sex!” ~Brody, Season 3, Episode 3


 * Brody: Homie we’ve planning this for two months, it’s like they’re all – don’t look at me like that you’ve known about it for two months; check your little backberry schedule.

Meet the Parents [3.4]

 * Spencer: I mean all I can tell you is that my whole life I never, never thought I was going to be the kind of person that wanted to get so serious with a girl ever ‘cuz I was like oh I’ll get married when I’m 50. And it’s like at the end of the day, I just love spending every second with Heidi so..


 * Heidi’s Stepdad (Tim)': But Heidi has been this type of gal that would be very social, and then should would get a boyfriend and she would lose all of her friends because they would become secondary to her and I mean, now all she has is you. If things were to go south, what would happen to her?  I just hate to have all of her eggs in one basket.


 * Spencer: What an angel.
 * Darlene: So Spencer, it seems to me that Lauren saw it has Heidi being taken away from her. Why does it have to be an either or?
 * Spencer: Cuz it’s literally like a stubborn immature selfish little girl who’s like ‘I want Heidi to myself. You don’t share her.’ It’s like literally like that, that’s what it’s about.

Rolling with the Enemy [3.5]

 * Lauren: Want to hear something kind of funny? I was in the bathroom, there’s three sinks, so I’m standing there are there are two other girls.  And all of a sudden one of them looks at the other and there’s a moment and they start full on making out.  Hands in the hair, making out.  Who makes out in a public restroom with another girl?

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 * Brody: Him and Heidi, I guess they’re just inseparable and that’s all he needs right now. That’s what I feel like. So, now me and Frankie have started dating.

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 * Heidi: You know what happened, Brody was saying things about Lauren. So then, he starts hanging out with her.  And Spencer’s like ‘You know what, Dude, where’s your loyalty?’ It’s like do you know who spread all these rumors? It’s Brody Jenner. And it’s like she’s hanging out with Brody Jenner as her new friend?

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 * Jen: You know what she said to me when we were fighting. She’s like ‘You know that I don’t want to be friends with you right now, you know that we need our space right now’ and I was like ‘yea’ but she’s like ‘But if you ever needed me, really needed me at 2 a.m. in the morning, crying, you know I’d be there in a second.’

Second Chances [3.6]

 * Lauren: And for once, my career and my personal were under control. Why is it that just when you get things together, you hear from the one person who could pull it all apart?” ~Lauren, Season 3, Episode 6

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 * Lauren: Don’t you hate that? Like bads guys, you’re like I just want to get over you, I just want you out of my life.  And as soon as you stop thinking about them, they’ll send you a text message or they’ll call you ‘cause they know you just stopped think about them.  It’s like a radar

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 * Derek: Well now that thrift stores are $50, $60 bucks for shirts. I was in one the other day in Melrose, it’s vintage, $70 bucks, I was like I have nine shirts at home that were all 40 cents.  Now vintage is like more trendy, that’s why they can mark it up, you know what I’m saying?  Isn’t it weird that I can buy a shirt for 40 cents and then a year later I can probably find the same shirt it’s going to be $40?

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 * Derek: What? What if I can’t stop thinking about you? Is that a bad thing? In a non-psychotic way. Maybe I’m psychotic. Maybe I murdered people, but… In high school, I dated a girl for seven years.

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 * Lauren: I think you just want to be with him when he’s the good Justin. But he can’t always be the good Justin.  And you can’t just like half of who a person is.

They Meet Again [3.7]

 * Heidi: And now me who was there for her through all of that hell is the one she won’t talk to. Because of you. I mean its just baffling, it’s like are you kidding me?

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 * Heidi: Ugh, you’ll never guess who I ran into? I went to dinner at Ketchup and guess who was there two tables away from us? Lauren and Jason.  So, first of all, we walk and they’re sitting there. I just can’t believe she’s talking to her crazy abusive ex-boyfriend who went to rehab and jail and she can’t forgive me? It’s like is she out of her mind?  So we try to send them over drinks to be like let’s feel out the water ya know, so they send them back, so we’re like, okay.

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 * Elodie: So what exactly did you do to her that makes her not even want to accept a drink? And also, you were also friends with Audrina and now she doesn’t talk to you anymore.  You were friends with Whitney too, you don’t even know what’s wrong and what’s right anymore.  It’s so sad.  Well, I’m going to finish up on this, so see ya.