The House (2017 film)

The House is a 2017 American comedy film about a couple who open an underground casino in their friend's house in order to pay for their daughter's college tuition.
 * ''Directed by Andrew J. Cohen. Written by Andrew J. Cohen and Brendan O'Brien.

If you can't beat the house, be... The House.(taglines)

Scott Johansen

 * Eat her fucking face off, Martha!

Kate Johansen

 * [Scott and Kate hold up their weapons to intimidate a bad driver] Wrong couple to fuck with, pal!

Frank Theodorakis

 * Are you guys familiar with the cliché, "It's a cliché because it's true? Well, that cliché about clichés being true has never been more true than right now with the cliché, the house always wins."

Dialogue

 * Joe: [gestures to the feminine sunglasses Scott is wearing] Are those women's sunglasses?
 * Scott Johansen: No, they're Italian.
 * Joe: [gesturing to the thin long cigarette Scott is smoking] Well, that's a woman's cigarette - that's nice.
 * Scott Johansen: No - also Italian. Italian sunglasses, Italian cigarettes.
 * Joe: Okay. Ciao!


 * [Carl shows his crooked middle finger to Frank]
 * Carl Shackler: Remember me, motherfucker?
 * Frank Theodorakis: Wow, that looks great.
 * [Tommy points his revolver at him]
 * Carl Shackler: Hey, dickfuck. You're not gonna like Tommy. He doesn't cut off fingers, he cuts off heads.
 * Tommy Papouli: Shut up.


 * Tommy Papouli: Where's the money?
 * Frank Theodorakis: We just got robbed.
 * Scott Johansen: Yeah.
 * Frank Theodorakis: Look, the saves are all empty.
 * Tommy Papouli: Do you know how many times I see someone point to any empty safe and say we have no money?
 * Frank Theodorakis: A hundred?
 * Scott Johansen: 500?
 * Frank Theodorakis: 30,000.
 * Tommy Papouli: It's rhetorical, fuckstick.
 * Frank Theodorakis: Okay.
 * Tommy Papouli: Shut up. This your daughter?
 * Scott Johansen: Where? Who, her?
 * Tommy Papouli: Right here.
 * Scott Johansen: That's such a compliment. This is my wife.
 * Kate Johansen: Alex?
 * Scott Johansen: In fact, there's our daughter.
 * Kate Johansen: There she is. Hello, daughter.
 * Scott Johansen: Hi, honey.
 * Kate Johansen: Don't overthink it, just be our daughter.
 * Scott Johansen: Come right here.
 * Rachel: I'm not your daughter, that's your--
 * [Scott pushes her into a desk and she screams]
 * Scott Johansen: Sorry, Rachel!
 * Tommy Papouli: The fuck's the matter with you?
 * Scott Johansen: What?
 * Tommy Papouli: Shoving a girl like that?
 * Scott Johansen: We are strict diciplinarians in our household.
 * Tommy Papouli: Get out of my way. I know this is your daughter.
 * [takes Alex by the arm]
 * Alex Johansen: Mom!
 * Scott Johansen: No, no, no!
 * [Tommy handcuffs himself to her]
 * Tommy Papouli: Cuff her.
 * Scott Johansen: Sweetie.
 * Alex Johansen: Mom.
 * Kate Johansen: Honey.
 * Scott Johansen: No.
 * Frank Theodorakis: Wait, no. Take me, not her.
 * Tommy Papouli: No. No one cares if you die.
 * Frank Theodorakis: Oh, thank god.
 * Tommy Papouli: Help 'em find the money. Oh, and hey... 300 grand. Or you'll never see your daughter again.
 * Alex Johansen: Mom! Dad! Help!
 * Carl Shackler: [raises his crooked middle finger at Scott, Kate, and Frank] Fuck you.
 * Alex Johansen: Help!
 * Carl Shackler: Fuck you.
 * Alex Johansen: Let go of me.

Cast

 * Will Ferrell - Scott Johansen
 * Amy Poehler - Kate Johansen
 * Jason Mantzoukas - Frank Theodorakis
 * Ryan Simpkins - Alex Johansen
 * Nick Kroll - Bob Schaeffer
 * Allison Tolman - Dawn Mayweather
 * Rob Huebel - Police Officer Chandler
 * Michaela Watkins - Raina Theodrakis
 * Jeremy Renner - Tommy Papouli
 * Cedric Yarbrough - Reggie Henderson
 * Rory Scovel - Joe Mayweather
 * Lennon Parham - Martha
 * Andrea Savage - Laura
 * Andy Buckley - Craig
 * Kyle Kinane - Kevin Garvey
 * Steve Zissis - Carl Shackler
 * Sam Richardson - Marty
 * Randall Park - Buckler
 * Jessica St. Clair - Reba
 * Alexandra Daddario - Corsica
 * Jessie Ennis - Rachel
 * Gillian Vigman - Becky
 * Wayne Federman - Chip Dave
 * Sebastian Maniscalco - Stand-Up Comic
 * Linda Porter - Old Lady
 * Ian Roberts - Driver at College Campus

Taglines

 * A hilarious high-stakes jackpot!