The Royle Family

The Royle Family is a popular BBC television situation comedy that ran for three series between 1998 and 2000. It concerned the lives of a cash-strapped working class Manchester family, the Royles.

Examples of humour
Jim Royle: These underpants cost me a quid, and I've got about fifty pence worth stuck up my arse.

(It's Christmas day and Emma and her parents have been invited to the house - Jim is telling Roger about his career prospects) Jim Royle: I've joined the dance. Roger Kavanagh: What dance is that, Jim? Jim Royle: The REDUNdance.

(Same episode as the one above- discussing Roger's visit to a lap-dancing club.) Jim Royle: How much for a dance, then, Roger? Roger Kavanagh: Ten quid. Jim Royle (horrified): Ten quid for a dance? Roger Kavanagh: Aye, you can't touch, either. Jim Royle (even more horrified): Ten quid for a dance and you can't touch?!

Antony Royle: Dad, where were you when Kennedy was killed? Jim Royle: What? Kennedy's dead? Antony Royle: Well, you know they say everybody remembers where they were when they heard he was killed? Jim Royle: Well, I don't remember, but I bloody bet our bloody immersion heater was on!

Antony Royle: Who's stunk that toilet out? Barbara Royle: Who d'ya think? Jim Royle: Well that's what it's for, isn't it, where d'you expect me to shit? You'd have something to complain about if I crapped in the kitchen. Denise Royle: Dad! Your fly hole's all undone. Jim Royle: Ah, the cage might be open, but the beast is asleep. Barbara Royle: Beast, my arse.

(Dave has just changed baby David and has put his nappy in a nappy bag. Barbara has asked Antony to take it to the bins with Darren.) Darren: Ay' Ant, Bag of Shite!

Jim Royle: It's good to talk, my arse...

Barbara (To Denise): Your Dad will go and pick Nana up on Sunday. Jim Royle: Why can't she get the bus on her own? Barbara: She's eighty-two. Jim Royle: Well, then, she should know the way by now.

Norma: May God forgive you, Jim Royle, for speaking ill of the dead like that! Jim: I wasn't talking about the dead. I was talking about you: the living bloody dead!

Anthony: Hey Denise I told Duckers about the baby, he's well made up. Denise (shocked): Why are you telling people about my baby? Mum, will you tell him. Barbara: Stop telling people will you Anthony. Anthony: I only told Duckers. Denise: Oh so Duckers knows about it before Nana. Jim: The only bloody thing your bloody Nana's more bloody interested in is bloody Coronation bloody street than the baby. Barbara: How many bloodys was that, Jim?

[Twiggy leaves after Sunday lunch] Jim: One greedy scrounging get that one. Fancy coming round here for his Sunday dinner! Dave: You asked him Jim! Jim: I know, but I didn't think he'd say yes!