User:Zer0431/Sandbox

JonTron is a web series as well as a character within that series. In it, Jon (played by Jon Jafari) and his pet cyborg/bird, Jacques, review games in a humorous manner.

Monster Bash Starrin' Johnny Dash
(Jon explains why the episode is late over an instrumental version of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air's theme song.)

Jon: Now this is a story all about how when hookin' my rig to SLI, that I accidentally burned out my processor, and now the Halloween video's a couple days late... Oh no... I REALLY BIT THE BIG ONE AGAIN!

(The song stops.)

Jon: So just pretend it's Halloween, you douchebags! - (Jon explains, shortly, how he got the game, after speaking about the history of games on MS-DOS, which is the platform this game is on.)

Jon: This game almost came to me as if by chance, a passing game out there somewhere in the world landed in the hands of a starry-eyed child waiting for adventure. And it meant more back then, too. Well, old friend, let's pop you in over some fine dining and booze and catch up, shall we?

(Cut to a shot of the game disc stuffed inside a rolled-up slice of pizza as Jon stumbles drunkenly over to the computer to put the disc in and play.)

Jon: (singing drunkenly) Don't forget to be careful with your rare games! (slams the game disc onto the disc drive's platter) Come on, just get in there, we gotta play. (shuts the disc drive) Oh, I hope it doesn't ruin - get any pizza in there... - (Jon tries to boot the game using DOSBox on his modern computer.)

Jon: (referring to the fact that DOSBox automatically starts on Drive Z:\, requiring the user to "mount" drive C:\ as a folder on the user's computer before it can be switched to) OK, so we're on Z:\ here - oh, oh wait, C:\ doesn't exist, 'cept it does. OK, (types as he is speaking) "mount C:\ C:\dosbox." OK, good, let's change directory to C:\, right, making progress here! (types in cd\dosbox) Change directory to "dosbox." (DOSBox apparently tries to run the file "dosbox," which does not exist, resulting in the following message popping up onscreen: "Illegal command: dosbox.") Okay, apparently I'm going to jail for that, 'cause it's "illegal."