Vegas Vacation

Vegas Vacation is a 1997 film about the Griswolds trip to Las Vegas, as Clark got an extra bonus for developing a food preservative.
 * Directed by Stephen Kessler.

This time the Griswolds are on a roll. (taglines)

Clark Griswold

 * That's nothing, it's a...birthmark.
 * Hard six coming out.
 * It's my long-life food preservative. The FDA finally approved it!
 * Eddie, This is great! They don't have any of these games at the Mirage.
 * His name is not Papagiorgio. His name is Rusty Griswold and he's a C+ student!
 * Don't think unnatural thoughts about your cousin, Rus.
 * ...and he want's to enter that garden, with a knowledge, and a mulch...
 * Oh, Keno! This is easy.
 * My pen burst. (after hotel employee notices Clark's arm is blue from falling in the plane's toilet)

Ellen Griswold

 * (after an attempt to have sex with Clark in the bathroom goes horribly wrong) I'll never fly again.
 * Clark, this is a family trip. Can you try to stay with the family.
 * Could be worse...you could be pregnant again.
 * You find the Clark Griswold that I married and you tell him that I'm at the Mirage!
 * I love what you've done with the kitchenette.
 * Well, I don't know what you would do with your horses, because, Clark likes to use the garage for the cars and the lawn mower.
 * I've got news for you Clark. I haven't said yes, yet.

Rusty Griswold

 * Couldn't you just roll us around on the bed again.
 * I put a dollar in I won a car, I put a dollar in I won a car, I put a dollar in I won a car, I put a dollar in I won a car.
 * Who would have thought my sister had the legs of a thoroughbred. Am I right?
 * So I says to him, I said, "Get your own monkey!"
 * It's expensive having an entourage.
 * Security: "No corrective lenses tonight Mr Papagiorgio?" Rusty: "No sir, I do not require them."
 * Holy crap, Wayne Newton's hittin' on mom!

Cousin Eddie

 * Clark, have you ever tried to swim with the dolphins?
 * [to Wayne Newton] Do you need a bodyguard? I'd die for you!
 * Aw, she's got her mother's looks and her daddy's sense of balance.
 * My garden's spittin' out 50-lb tomatoes.
 * Hey, kids. Round-up time!
 * Oh, yeah. That's from when I sold my kidney.  I figured with all the advancements in modern science, I'd better sell it while someone still wanted to buy it.  Smartest thing I ever did, Clark.
 * Ahh Uban Coffee you know you can sprinkle that stuff on anything, ice cream, mashed potatoes or just eat it straight out of the can for a quick pick me up.
 * Don't worry, he's with me.
 * It's a bust, Las Vegas fun police, hand over your chips. ha ha ha ha
 * Whoa man it is a blazer out there. You're lucky you got air conditioning in here {Casino} - like mother nature intended.
 * I gotta warn ya Clark – they don’t play the same games that they do at them regular casinos

Cousin Vicki

 * Lord is my witness, I hate this heat! If it isn't gluing your butt to the truck seat it's making you sweat like a farm animal!
 * In this world, you’re either up on the stage in the spotlight, or down in the pit serving drinks
 * Honey, these boys ain't much to talk to, but, if you want a night away from your cat... they're more than fine.

Other

 * Jilly - That's it, kid. Now all we have to do is teach you how to dress.
 * Roy - What a great audience.

Dialogue

 * Clark: Eddie, did anyone ever tell you, you're bad luck.
 * Eddie: You know, those were my mother's dying words.  Course, when you're covered in third degree burns and your leg's caught in a bear trap, you're bound to say weird things.




 * Ellen: Clark. Are you feeling lucky tonight, Sparky?
 * Clark: Not right now, honey. They're teaching me baccarat.




 * Clark: Here, make the seats good.
 * [begins pouring coins into the Maitre d's hand]
 * Maitre d' : No...gratuity...necessary, sir. Right this way.




 * Jilly: Kid, you made me a lot of money tonight. Hey, you like gettin' massages?
 * Rusty: By who?
 * Jilly: [sarcastically] By who...by me. Meet me in the spa tomorrow at 10 o'clock.




 * Clark: You need any help with the grill, Eddie?
 * Eddie: No thanks, Clark. Don't have one. [throws chicken onto a rock] I'll get the tongs




 * Audrey: OK, what happened to you last night?
 * Rusty: [giggles]
 * [Audrey and Rusty sit down to breakfast]
 * Audrey: Coffee
 * Rusty: Me, too.
 * Ellen: Make it three.
 * Clark: [to waitress] Four coffees it is.
 * Clark: Kids!
 * Audrey: Daddy, don't shout.
 * Clark: What do you say we each have an 'alone day', where each of us can go out and explore the city of Las Vegas in their own way.
 * Ellen: Clark, I don't think that's such a good...
 * Rusty: Thanks
 * Audrey: See, ya.
 * Clark: Don't worry, honey. You're gonna love it.  See ya.




 * Security: Have you seen a guy named Nick Papagiorgio?
 * Clark: Yes, he took my wallet. He's over there.




 * [at Club Areola]
 * Security: Your usual table, Mr. Papagiorgio?
 * Rusty: Not today, Jimmy.
 * Clark: You're in deep trouble, my friend.




 * Ellen: Clark. Are we lost?
 * Rusty: Yeah, dad. What block are we on?
 * Clark: Very funny, Rus.




 * Rusty: I wanna gamble.
 * Clark: Russell. I never want to hear those words come out of your mouth again.  Gambling is a very serious business.

Cast

 * Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold
 * - Ellen Griswold
 * - Cousin Eddie
 * - Russell "Rusty" Griswold
 * - Audrey Griswold
 * - Cousin Catherine
 * - Cousin Vicki
 * Juliette Brewer - Cousin Ruby Sue
 * - Marty the Blackjack dealer
 * - "Girl in the Red Ferrari" (non-speaking cameo)
 * - Mirage desk clerk
 * - himself
 * - themselves
 * - young Frank Sinatra impersonator/fake ID salesman
 * - Mr. Ellis
 * - "Gilly from Philly"