Virginia Satir

Virginia Satir (26 June 1916 – 10 September 1988) Psychotherapist, family therapist, co-founder of the Mental Health Research Institute (MHRI) in Menlo Park, founder of the International Human Learning Resources Network (IHLRN; originallythe "Beautiful People") in 1970, and The Advanta Network in 1977; born Virginia Pagenkopf.

Quotes

 * “Life is not the way it’s supposed to be. It’s the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference” - 1986 meeting of 600 Los Angeles-area psychologists, psychiatrists and other mental health professionals.
 * “I think if I have one message, one thing before I die that most of the world would know, it would be that the event does not determine how to respond to the event. That is a purely personal matter. The way in which we respond will direct and influence the event more than the event itself.” - 1986 meeting of 600 Los Angeles-area psychologists, psychiatrists and other mental health professionals.
 * Why Family Therapy?...because it deals with family pain.
 * Conjoint Family Therapy: A Guide to theory and technique (1967)


 * A growing body of clinical observation has pointed to the conclusion that the family therapy must be oriented to the family as a whole.
 * Conjoint Family Therapy: A Guide to theory and technique (1967)


 * I believe the greatest gift I can conceive of having from anyone is to be seen, heard, understood and touched by them. The greatest gift I can give is to see, hear, understand and touch another person. When this is done, I feel contact has been made.
 * Brief biography at Webster University


 * I have often thought had there been somebody like me around, something might have been able to be done. I also think I don't see how I could have done what I've done in the world had I been married. And when I decided-because I've been on the verge of marriage many times-I said no, because if I wanted to roam the globe like I did, it wouldn't be fair. It wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to the people. At the point, I really feel it was a kind of destiny because I've been able to get to places. There are some people in the world who have other jobs to do.
 * Brief biography at Avanta.net (1999)


 * To all my friends, colleagues and family: I send you love. Please support me in my passage to a new life. I have no other way to thank you than this. You have all played a significant part in my development of loving. As a result, my life has been rich and full, so I leave feeling very grateful.
 * Brief biography at Avanta.net (1999)


 * We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.
 * Magic Touch: Six Things You Can Do to Connect in a Disconnected World., Forbes, 18 Jan 2011.